Regulars
Warrenboy75
Anywhere in the USA on any given day
From the few dancers I know the goal normally is to make about 500 a night. Sitting and talking ( unless paying for conversation is the new norm ) isn't going to enhance the odds of making that type of money.
Because most of my opportunities happen when I travel and because I took a long hiatus of over 20 years until last year of going to a strip club (also add the only clubs near where I live are not places I care to frequent) I'm just wondering if there are any advantages or if I am missing something, or if there has been a change in how clubs/dancers operate in the last 20 -25 years.
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While I like trying new girls, I tend to have regular dancers. They will spend time with me at my seat and sometimes it can lead to OTC. With a regular I know what to expect in VIP, and I know it will be fun since she wouldn't be a regular if she was lame.
For the dancer, they know that I'm not going to be inappropriate, I will pay them for their time, and I'm a 'sure thing'; they don't need to hustle me. My ex-ATF only had regulars. Except for me (for some reason), they were all very old, and very rich. She didn't need to hustle the 'wanna dance?' line and made an easy living.
I had another "regular" that was great at hustling new PL's. When I asked her about OTC she was not even remotely interested as she didn't want the hassle of intimacy with customers. She had great skills and even when the club was really slow she was able to get dances from new guys. She would always encourage me to get dances from other girls too, which I kind of liked...
The disadvantage of having regular dancers is you feel guilty if you want to try someone new, and the jealousy that dancers sometimes have when you're chatting up other girls. And if you want to 'break up' with a regular it can get ugly. I've been lucky to avoid that but I'm sure others have some pretty bad stories they could tell.
"...and I know it will be fun since she wouldn't be a regular if she was lame."
From the dancer's perspective, she knows the money is worth her time or he wouldn't be a regular. Both parties have the same amount of control (or as George would call it, "hand") in the relationship.
Downside is the lack of variety, which I crave out of dancers as a married PL. Also, sometimes there's personal life drama that you're exposed to that can kill the fantasy. Additionally, as mentioned above, there is a feeling of guilt when you engage another dancer and sometimes your CF can harbor some toxic jealously as well when that happens.
The most important thing you're missing: You have NO IDEA how much money is being exchanged between a regular and his ATF. Guys sitting around frustrated just see a girl talking with a regular for hours, and don't see them going back for dances. They have no idea if he's bought her night out for $1000, or he just paid her car payment for her, or if at the end of their 5 hours together he takes her back for a $450 champagne room and tips her $450 on top of that. These are, most assuredly, things that happen. So first caution: many of these girls are smarter than you (or me) when it comes to making judgements about the smartest way to spend her time, so if you can't figure out why she's spending so much time and it looks to you like no money is being exchanged, you should assume you just don't have all the data, rather than she is just being dumb.
-->" or if there has been a change in how clubs/dancers operate in the last 20 -25 years. "
No change, still works the same way as it did 25 years ago.
Advantages of regulars to a stripper: consistent source of income to smooth out ups and downs of the extreme micro- and macro-business cycles, regulars will adjust their schedule so she can set an appointment for when it's convenient for her (a less busy time) so she makes money during that downtime and then he leaves and she still reaps the rewards later of busier times at the club, less emotionally and spiritually taxing in the sense that regulars tend to treat their ATFs better than an average PL does (although regulars can be more needy, and that's taxing in a different way).
Advantages of being a regular to PLs: Overall the potential to spend (far) less money for the time and mileage (if you're not dumb enough to become a RIL, in which case, it's the reverse), far more mileage and sex options available to you than most PLs, she'll specifically let you know when things are slow and your $ will stretch the most, and more connection (or the illusion of more connection)
If a dancer doesn't come around to you on her own, either ask her to or let it go and find another one. I have had lame dances result because she wants to put in the minimum effort and get back to a regular, but also have had great ones because she just needed a little push so that it wasn't her idea to leave a regular's side.
From her perspective, maybe she is comparing her income to her friends who work 8 hours at shit jobs making $10-12/hr. In that case, if she can do $150 on a 6 hour shift from guys trying to curry favor with her, that's still winning. As the others have said, it may happen that there is a payoff at the end of the night or in some other way that you aren't seeing.
I have seen dancers that I wanted to get a few dances from go for a 15 minute room, then sit for 30-45 minutes and get a 30 minute room with the same customer. While she might have been able to have made a bit of extra money with me during that 30 minutes in theory, she might not have been able to sell the 30 minute room as a result.
Also, I'm pretty sure that a lot of the positive influence on dancer quality is that they are afforded the opportunity to make their money in the way that works best for them. I can sympathize with this, since I might be able to make an extra $100-200 per shift sucking the manager's cock at my job, but I would rather forgo that income opportunity and stick to activities more closely related to my formal job description.
Also, I'm pretty sure that a lot of the positive influence on dancer quality is that they are afforded the opportunity to make their money in the way that works best for them. I can sympathize with this, since I might be able to make an extra $100-200 per shift sucking the manager's cock at my job, but I would rather forgo that income opportunity and stick to activities more closely related to my formal job description."
Exactly, and it's worth re-emphasizing. I am solidly convinced that the reason a girl might stick around with me as a regular for 4 hours, for $200, and also drastically violate the rules in the VIP room, rather than take her chances for those 4 hours and possibly make $300 or more over that same period: stripping CAN be emotionally and spiritually difficult. With me, she feels respected and is relaxed. What will happen with others? Well, she doesn't know. Strip club customers are the most disrespectful in the sex industry (outside of street walker customers, I imagine)... so she might be disrespected, she might turned down a lot, she might have to turn down roaming hands, she might get subjected to horrible body odors, she might get played for her time then not given the promised dances. Yes, it's her job to deal with all that as a stripper, and she will -- but when she has a chance to deal with a trusted and known-quantity regular, she may choose a period of lower-compensation higher-mileage regular time and the accompanying far lower stress level, and use that to marshal her energy for the end of her shift
Additionally I've seen some of the real life drama first hand--it is possible to meet, date, and have a relationship with one of the girls and not have met her in a club :--) Another story for a different time perhaps.
For the most part I have the area from Ohio to DC to NJ/NY when I have the time and the inclination to visit clubs. Maryland and Delaware as well. I've had good to very good experiences so far to my level of satisfaction ---treated very well in two of the Christie's in N.E. Ohio. I'm just not sure I want to become "Norm" from Cheers fame although you guys are making a good case for doing so I thank-you for the feedback. Not sure what an RIL is but I understand it isn't something I want to become.
The Glossary can be found at the bottom of the page
It can go either way on whether being a club regular is positive or not. It's easier to get pulled into dancer politics when even the ones you haven't gotten dances with recognize you. If you're regularly present during slow periods, being known as a spending customer can be beneficial or lead to dancer wars over who has rights and under what conditions to sit next to the only guy spending money in the club.
Further riffing on my own nonsense: this is also why many girls sit around in the back or at the bar, waiting for their regulars. Yes, they might make $20 (or more) here and there if they hustled, but there's payment to be made in terms of energy and emotional fatigue. A buddy of mine once told me, "your ATF hides in the back until you walk in the club", and I'm not surprised at all... on a particularly frustrating shift, why NOT save your highest energy and best mood for your good regular, even if you leave the club $40 less rich?
2 Years later my favorite had moved to a different club and I made a special trip there just to see her. She was surprised and delighted as hell. We did a couple of dances that were reminiscent of our dances at the other club. Then she got called on stage. While she was up there I decided my next move was to take her to VIP when she got off stage.
When she got off stage she came back to me to tell me. "My regular just came in. I gotta go".
I never went back to see her again. :)
Being a stripper's regular can have big benefits (and negatives -- just depends on what type of experience you're looking for). Being a club regular is the same. I my "home" club, I can 100% guarantee you:
- I'll sashay in without paying the cover. You will be stopped and have to pay the cover.
- If we order a coke, you'll get charged for it ($4.50! WTF?!), I won't. I won't get charged for refills, either
- If we both order gin & tonics, I'll get a bigger pour than you (at least until you tip enough to be shown you should be treated otherwise). Once in a while, the bartender will slip the top-shelf gin in mine, while charging me the bottom-shelf-gin price.
- If we go to the VIP, the bouncer will be checking on you often, and you'll get a talking to if you move your hands too far afield. If it's just me and my stripper back in the VIP, most of the time the bouncer won't even come back there... since I go during slow times, I sometimes go months without ever seeing a bouncer in the back, they simply let me do what I want, within reason
- Both the manager and the bouncer will, at some point, wander by my table to press the flesh, maybe have a drink together, etc. Your best outcome is that you do NOT want any attention from the manager or bouncer; if they're coming over to your table, it might not be a good sign.
In short: it can be good to be a regular :) It is, again, very much a matter of personal style and what you're looking to get out of your experience, rather than right or wrong. But being a club regular, and having a CF, is what provides me with the experience I personally enjoy
Even when I was heavy into the escort scene I was always a one-woman guy....
Unless he liked the public attention I never understood girls sitting with their regulars at the bar which seems like for hours. I didn't realized this when I was a noob but the girls are being paid to sit with them for that long.
For me, I don't like the attention so I'm either getting a LDs, go vip, if possible set up a OTC (which I have never had the opportunity yet) when I'm in the club and talking to my favorite dancer.
If you don't care for variety but like eating the same favorite meal(because u know what your getting) once a month or more frequent its better being a regular because the girls, usually, get comfortable with you and allow more to go on then if u weren't a regular.
Becoming known as a regular to a club and a girl will let the other girls know you are safe, and it's also possible that it will clue the other girls in to what sort of dances you are looking for. Both will make your strip clubbing easier.
As I said, there are no real downsides, but plenty of advantages. At the end of last year, I met a dancer who was a coed at a local college. She had started dancing at the start of the semester, then midway through decided she didn't want to dance anymore - except for me. For the next few months (until she moved away) whenever I wanted to see her I would set up a meeting at a local strip club, we'd spend a few hours together, and then we would both leave. She was a really beautiful girl, and she wouldn't dance for anyone else.
If u see a dancer u like at the bar for 2 hours with the same guy, your shit out of luck, if u wanted a dance from her. Looking back, not realizing it was a regular's club, i never had fun at these types of clubs. Now I know why.
Some pros/cons IMO:
PROS:
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(p) known-quantity - you know her and she knows you - if she's your regular it means you found a dancer that you find attractive and treats you well (vs winging it on every visit) - for her she knows you will spend on her and she's comfortable w/ how you behave
(p) most likely as a regular you will get more/better mileage b/c she's comfortable w/ you and she wants to keep you as a steady source of income (although IMO/IME is not a requirement to be a regular to get good-mileage but in certain clubs it def makes a difference) - also better chance of seeing her OTC (outside the club) since she knows you
(p) priority seating - meaning she will make a beeline for you bypassing all the other losers when she sees you in the club (unless she's already w/ another regular that spends just as well or better than you do - and why many PLs and dancers these days use a free cell-ph burn-app such as "Sideline" to communicate and arrange visits (or OTC) and w/ a burn-app neither party has to divulge their real cell #)
CONS:
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(c) dancers tend to get territorial about their $$$ (can't blame them; lots of competition and we PLs are weak and can be easily snatched-up by the competition) - thus you may not be able to play-the-field in the club as she will stick to you like glue and mark her territory by leaving her purse, part of her outfit, etc, when she has to hit the stage or the restroom; and other dancers will often tend to stay clear of you once they know your are X's regular - most custies find it hard to tell their regular "not today I wanna get w/ other girls" but if your PL-game is strong enough it's def doable to have a regular dancer and also get w/ other girls in the club (but you would most-likely need to approach the other girls)
(c) your regular-dancer can get complaisant and not try as hard as she did at first especially when the PL lets her do pretty-much w/e she wants - "familiarity breeds contempt" thing
(c) "too-close for comfort" - many of these girls often have personal problems and financial problems and these can often become your problems as the only one close to her that may have his shit together - so you can become "Mr Emergency" unless you nip that in the bud upfront
IMO it's worth being a regular if you like that type of interaction - I don't but many do.
nowadays, i have a regular dancer who i see once every other month or so. i THINK i like being a regular more than the variety thing, but its definitely not easy choosing between the two. sometimes it depends on the other girls on shift. for example, the last time i saw my CF was on a slow sunday and there were only 5 or 6 girls in total working. there was MAYBE 2 other girls (not counting my fav) who appealed me. but they weren't so enticing that i wanted to pursue them over my CF who i get an increased amount of intimacy from because i've spent money on her several times in the past.
however, on other nights, when there are more girls working and my CF is there, i gotta admit i get curious when i see another dancer who REALLY appeals to me. the good thing is.....my CF doesn't try to lock me down
I must be doing something right or at least have good karma going.
Again guys thanks for the POV's.