How about this.

15 comments

• jackslash

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  8 years ago

  I wish you had told us her age. If she's very young (18 to 20), I can agree on insisting her mom be told. If she's over 21, I think she is fully adult and must be left to her own devices.
• shadowcat

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  8 years ago

  Bros before hoes! I can't think of a better situation than this. Now I wouldn't rush up to your buddy and say "Guess who I saw at the Pink Monkey last night?" but if her name comes up in a conversation I would mention it. I hope you didn't get any dances from her.
• twentyfive

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  8 years ago

  Shadow I didn't and I wouldn't, I thought about what you said when I first spoke with her but I also don't want to cause a family fight I really wish I hadn't seen her.
  Gawker she turned twenty one just 3 months ago.
• twentyfive

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  8 years ago

  ^^ didn't and wouldn't get dances from her.
• Papi_Chulo

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  8 years ago

  She's of age and can make her own decisions and has a right to do so - if it was a situation where her safety was in danger (hanging w/ druggies, hanging w/ a bad crowd/criminals) then that would be different - my 2 cents - she's also an adult and entitled to her privacy and private life
• JohnSmith69

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  8 years ago

  What happens in the strip club stays in the strip club. I would not say anything to anybody.
• Estafador

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  8 years ago

  You did the right thing. While you may have good intentions, you being her only safety net would look extremely weird since you also dip in the strip. Mama can give her a bunch of pointers and what not to do.
• Dominic77

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  8 years ago

  I Think it goes down like this:
  
  Patriarchal rules if she's under 21 and still living at home (Dad's house, Live under Dad's rules, learn the hard lesson, kiddo).
  
  Otherwise she's a full adult and I wouldn't say a thing. If anything she may need guidance.
  
  If it comes up later with Dad or Mom, I'd take it on the chin.
  
• Dominic77

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  8 years ago

  ^ By guidance, you might tell her mom.
• Subraman

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  8 years ago

  For me, it depends on a lot of things, starting with: how good is this "Friend"? Let me reverse the question for a moment. My best buddy sees my little girl -- the light of my life -- at a strip club, I know for a fact that he's been around the clubs enough to know that girls don't always emerge from this experience intact, and ... he doesn't tell me? That guy isn't my friend, period. Doesn't matter how old my daughter is, she's still my daughter. So, reversing things, if I see the daughter of one of my best, inner-circle of friends, there isn't much discussion or pondering needed: I owe it to him to tell him, just like he'd owe it to me. Easy decision.
  
  Regarding any other of my buddies, it becomes harder. I think you made a fine choice, insisting she tell her mom -- now it's the mom who is on the hook. More casual acquaintances, I'm probably keeping my nose out of it completely.
• twentyfive

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  8 years ago

  @Subraman I'm still having a tough time coming to grips with this situation, I feel the same way about my family as you do, I'm letting the dust settle a bit before I do anything about it. He is an old friend, we don't travel in the same circles as often as either of us would like, but knowing this guy as well as I do my thought is his wife would be better equipped to deal with this than I might be. If I don't hear from her mother in a week or so I'll probably go back to that club and talk to this girl a bit more before deciding on a course of action, my main worry is something happening to her because I did nothing. If I hear from the mother I will feel better about the whole situation.
  An aside to Papi and everyone else that said, she's over 21 and an adult and that is true but your children are your babies until you die and beyond.
• skibum609

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  8 years ago

  I grew up in an era when being a "tattletale" was something bad. Bad to the extent that if you tattled on your classmate and they got detention or a suspension, you received the same penalty. Telling her parents, or forcing her to do so is not appropriate. If something happens to her it is not your fault, but if that's an issue consider this: You tell. Her parents get mad. She runs off on her own to a City where she knows no one. She gets in trouble and pays a serious price. Worth telling still? The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
• twentyfive

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  8 years ago

  -^^^ A tattletale really, that's stupid. She isn't one of my classmates or my brother who broke a vase in the living room. FWIW this is grown up stuff not even remotely similar.
• flagooner

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  8 years ago

  ^ "She always says, 'Don't play ball in the house.'"
• flagooner

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  8 years ago

  ^ "She always says, 'Don't play ball in the house.'"