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rickthecoconutcrab

On the beaches of Hawai'i... wearing a suit and taking time to scuttle across the bikini babes!

9 yrs ago · 1 min read

I've heard that this is the place to make the case for membership in the council of ricks. I've been told that many council members post here. That apparently includes rickdugan, the smartest and most kick-ass hairless ape on the planet.

Let me tell you guys a little about myself. I'm the most badass kind of crab on the planet, a coconut crab. I wear a suit. I like slutty female hairless apes. I just love scuttling all over nude female apes and putting my big claws up their pussies. I'm a big fan of President Trump because he likes to grab hairless ape pussies and so do I!

So how about a vote of confidence. I'm thinking about finding that Dougster scalawag and pinching his balls. And trust me, when a male hairless ape gets his balls pinched by a coconut crab he's singing like one of the castrati for the rest of his life! You're on notice Dougster...your balls are not long for the world!

Scuttle...scuttle...scuttle...

Replies (12)Latest

Profile picture for shailynn
shailynn

I highly recommend you get an avatar.

Profile picture for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

Now ricky boy has crabs

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crazyjoe

Crabs! Crabs! Crabs!

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larryfishsticks

CRABS HAVE SHELLS FISHSTICKS HAVE BREADING

Profile picture for ATACdawg
ATACdawg

You think Pres Trump will help you? How many tons of crab do think are served in Trump restaurants and golf clubs every day?

Ha! To paraphrase Trump, "You're fried!"

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warhawks

Council of Ricks?

We only have a council of Dicks on here.

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4got2wipe

rickthecoconutcrab! Brilliant! ;)

Profile picture for jackslash
jackslash

Q. What is the worst name for a strip club? A. Joe's Crab Shack.

Profile picture for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe

Ace comment jackslash!

Though I bet crab lice are now on the endangered species list with shaving being so prevalent!

#CrabLivesMatter

Profile picture for ATACdawg
ATACdawg

@4got:. When my brother was in his medical internship, he had picked up a crab lice from a patients pubic hair. He put it between two microscope slides, taped the edges and stuck it in his pocket to take home and show his wife.

The nurse who was working with him asked if that was a good idea. ""What if he gets out?"

My brother replied, "He'll know where to go, and I'll know where to find him."

Profile picture for Dominic77
Dominic77

Flags and pussy is really tasteless but some reason I'm finding all of this pretty funny.

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Dominic77

Crabs and pussy is really tasteless but for some reason I'm finding all of this pretty funny.

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