Why do you hairless apes need god in your lives?

avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion
Straight outta tha NC, comin' atcha with an AK ready to steal your daughter. ROAR!!!
I have a news flash for you: there is no god.

Would a just god let you hairless apes fuck up the planet the way you have. Either god cannot perceive how fucked up you are, in which case he's not omniscient, or he can't stop you fuck ups, in which case he's not omnipotent. Or he doesn't care. In which case he's not omnibenevolent.

And if there is an alien being that not omniscient, omnipotent, or omnibenevolent why call him god? It's the lion's paradox.

The world appears to be exactly the way you would expect if we're all alone in a cold, pitiless universe. Make your own happiness or die a gibbering idiot. Those are your choices.

I choose happiness. I choose to be a rick.

ROAR!

14 comments

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avatar for jackslash
jackslash
8 years ago
Well, Rickthephilosopher, everybody has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
8 years ago
rickthelion, that was a sad read. Clearly you have spent too much time with Godless strippers. Come back to Jesus brother - there is still time.
avatar for Tiredtraveler
Tiredtraveler
8 years ago
What difference does it make in your life whether or not I or anyone else believes in God (other than islamists). The way I read your post is that your religion is Vanity, or 'Humanism' (humans are their own god) since you insist upon evangelizing all of us.
Humanism has been put forth by the intellectual and political elite in order to deify themselves making it easier to manipulate the 'masses'.
I suggest you watch the movie "Devil's Advocate" Satan is a lawyer and "Vanity is my favorite sin".
This manipulation goes all the way back in recorded history,recent examples are dark & middle ages popes, Mao, Lenin, Mussolini, Hitler, Hirohito, Castro, Khomeini, ISIS, Kim Jon IL, Hillary... all paint(ed) themselves as saviors, prophets or gods for POWER.
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
8 years ago
In the far future, man will uncover the secrets of the universe and hunt down and imprison God
Pride of man
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
8 years ago
Every time I fuck my current MILF buddy she screams "Jesus" is that close enough?
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
8 years ago
I must be Jesus. Every time I go into Follies they say "Jesus Christ are you here again?"
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
8 years ago
You ask why God allows bad things to happen?

It's because God gave humanity dominion over all the Earth and, this is most important, free will to obey Him or not. Disobedient? If you are genuinely penitent, you will be forgiven. If your sins are great, and you are unrepentant, you're in for a hot time. But don't worry, rick. I'm sure we'll provide you with lots of company! No food, though - it is Hell after all..... :-)
avatar for Hugh_G_Rection
Hugh_G_Rection
8 years ago
Well obviously Rick the Lion is not the same Lion that was the protagonist of C.S. Lewis's Narnia books. Probably a good thing.

Methinks come the judgement day Rick will find out that St. Peter is a Wildebeast.....
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
8 years ago
Option 1.
God is allowing Satan some time to prove who's way is the right way, Satan's way, or God way. Satan is running out of time before losing it big time. The planet is going to hell doing it Satan's way.

Option 2.
We are nothing but Sims in an artificially created universe which is nothing but a simulation and God is an all powerful AI.

Option 3
You're all crazy because you believe this is reality. It's my dream. You're just lucky I don't dream about disasters all the time.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
If cats ruled the world:
http://c1.thejournal.ie/media/2013/06/cr…

SJG
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
8 years ago
Lol, SJG! Your best post ever.
avatar for Sundry_Misc
Sundry_Misc
8 years ago
You can always tell a college sophomore when they spring that jack in the box and think they're the first ones to turn the crank. One day he might read Dostoevsky and understand the difference between a good question and smartass response.

Jesus did say tax collectors and prostitutes would enter into heaven's reign before many. So hopefully we'll all be in good company.
avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion
8 years ago
Of course all of you are all just a bunch of damn dirty apes so it isn't like your opinions matter. Except my good bud rickdugan of course. That guy is the smartest hairless ape on the planet so I have to take his opinion seriously.

Rick my friend, have you really thought you position through carefully. I respect you but sometimes you still think like a hairless ape. Perhaps we should consult with the wisest of the ricks, our bud the barnacle.

There is something about being sessile that gives you perspective. Just think about how rickthebarnacle hangs out on his luxury yacht all day, wearing his impeccable barnacle suit. That guy is a thinker.

I'm going to try to get in touch with my inner barnacle. Perhaps you should as well. We'll chat later.
avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion
8 years ago
Sundry_Misc, you must be proud of yourself because you know how to spell Dostoyevsky. Well I never went to one of your hairless ape colleges. I got my degree from tha NC. Straight outta Ngorongoro crater bitch. You get smart with me and you better look over your shoulder. Someday you'll see lion wearing a suit and carrying an AK.

And when you see me I'll say something.

Something that rhymes with schmildebeest.

ROAR!
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