The number one question dancers ask is "wanna dance". But after that, what is the second most prevalent questions you hear? For me it's some variation of Where are you from/where were you born
Another question why do they ask questions? A lot of times its to make small talk, I get it. But sometimes it seems as if they are doing a little interrogation to run game. What are they trying to find out & why?
These are what sales people call qualifying questions. They want to know local or visitor, how much do you make, can I count on you as a regular, can I make your day better? Yes, they are running game but they will alter the game depending on the answers to the questions. When the girl doesn't ask these type of questions and talks about what ever type of shit that is currently rattling around in her head I make my own assumptions about her lack of marketing skills. That is unless we have talked on a previous visit. I try to detect whether I can (or want to), get extras. Then my convo turns into a "job" interview.
I see the logic of using qualifying questions, but the girls that come up to me and are successful are either so hot to me that I don't care WHAT they say, or become so much fun to banter with that I feel like I "owe" the dance because I was having so much fun. The top girls have a gift for the latter no matter what they look like, while the top lookers who can be engaging are the ones driving the Ferraris (if they work top end clubs).
For some it's just small talk, for some it's subtly figuring some things out.
I'd concur with second most common be some variation of where do you live.
TheFWord gives an excellent explaination.
The two most common questions that I get are: "What's my name?" and "Where are you from?"
I believe they ask those questions to size you up as being a regular or reliable money source. It's all part of the game my man.
What do you do for work helps them figure out the size of your wallet.
JAmesSD: I tell them I'm a greeting card salesman. That's what Maxwell Smart used as his cover. Some actually think I'm serious!
No. For me it's more like small talk of cocktail talk or something like:
"I saw you here two weeks ago, didn't I?" No.
"You look familiar, you're been in here before / didn't I give you some dances before?" Depends
"It's been awhile, how have you been?"
"Did you finish that thing / do that thing we talked about the last time you were here?"
^^^ many of the better ones remember my convo from a couple months ago.
"And then what happened?" ^^^ common tactic, effective for convo
Did you fart?
Some girls say " didn't I see you here last month", unlikely as it's plainly obvious I am a tourist.
The girls who work in strip clubs are still just ordinary girls.
If I want to start getting along with a girl, I tell her about myself, anticipating all the things she will want to know, but might feel she should not ask.
SJG
Funny, in thinking about my answer, I realize that I often don't let the stripper lead the conversation once she gets past "would you like some company?" and "I'm Amber! What's your name?". Usually, once she's gone that far, I take over the conversation. This isn't anything conscious or Machiavellian, I just see no reason to sit through my one-zilliionth round of "what do you do?" "where do you live?" "do you come here a lot?" with a stripper, when I could be talking about more fun things.
Normally, once we've gotten each others' names, if the girl is not familiar to me, I ask her how long she's been working there, and then immediately steer the conversation to my favorite topic -- strip clubs. If she's been working there a while, I tease her about avoiding me for so long, she teases me back, and then I steer the conversation to my next favorite topic, what kind of shot she'd like to do with me.
Eventually, she does get to ask all her qualifying questions, but I typically like to carry the conversation for the first 10 minutes to see how she responds and decide whether or not I want her to sit there the rest of the night or not.
^^^ I also suspect the dancers are downright relieved that someone other than them is guiding the conversation along. I dunno, the SW girls go apeshit about customers trying to "control" the conversation, but I don't sense any struggle for control at all, I think the girls are glad that I can verbal-judo us into a fun conversation that isn't overly nasty or disrespectful, and they can just go along and be adorable. Just my theory
I wouldn't think too deeply about it..LOL I think its mostly just small leading up to do you want a private dance.
Another reason for dancers to like whales -- guided convo -- lets her a mental break, etc.
Agree with joewebber.
I've been presented with so many different approaches with different outcomes that I'm not sure it even matters what gets asked or doesn't. Like joew said it's routine for them. One Ive done dances with and even listened to her talk about her hobby the first time we met approached me with the same line she did the first time, "You look like you play sports...did you play this, blah, blah, blah."
A couple weeks ago outside the club after I stopped at a food cart, A dancer looking over some damage to her car asked me a question I hadn't heard a dancer ask. Are you sober? I said yes. Then she said it's sober or slammer. That has been a police public message on tv in our area. I thought some guys might think that was a bit rude to ask. However she knew I wasn't going to buy any dances from her for at least a week or longer since I was on my way out. If she had arrived in the club before I left, she could have seen that I had been drinking ice water for the last 2 hours. Technically I had been drinking. Even though it was water.
I can imagine if a bouncer asked customers while leaving if they were sober all the responses he might get. Some might not be nice. I treat dancer questions like an optional choice response. Lie, tell the truth, or make up crap. I do remember if they really like the story you told, be careful if they may want you to repeat the story in another week. I can't remember every story I told from one week to the next. I told a story so good one time, that the dancer told other dancers and wanted more information the following week and wanted me to tell several of her friends.
All of those are time-filler or time-waster questions so she can pretend she's getting to know you. They don't give a shit, and neither do I. Has nothing to do with the 2 most important things, how much we click and how much I'll spend. Any person with any experience can come up with much better questions.
These are questions I never hear:
Wow, is your dick really that big?
Will you fuck me? No charge.
Will you give me a ride home?
have you been here before
how did you here about us
the most famous Are you a cop
Her: What's your name?
You: My name is...
Her: Is that your real name or stripper name?
the most famous Are you a cop? I've been asked that twice. Got a BJ both times.
Her: Is that your real name or stripper name? I friend of mine said when she said her name was Mercedes "So your parents knew you were going to be a stripper the day you were born."
A common question: "So, what brings you here tonight?" I typically respond that I had an urge to spend time with beautiful naked women.
I think some of them ask b/c they gotta talk to you about something/anything to break the ice but o/w don't care & just want to sell you a couple of dances.
The ones that are more serious about their dancing & see/treat it as their one-person micro-business are probably trying to size you up.
^^^ Yep... to re-iterate what I (and che) said above, if you are sick of those questions, take a more active part in the conversation right from the get-go. I think being able to carry and lead a conversation, so it's not all on her shoulders all the time, is a little thing strippers appreciate, and probably at least a small part of why strippers will stay with me for hours and hours even though I don't pay hugely
I don't mind any questions as long as they don't involve religion or politics. Getting to know each other builds trust and trust opens doors and spreads legs. Of course I am fortunate enough to not have anything to hide.
shadow: I don't mind any questions either. I just don't think the same old boring "where are you from" etc. questions are remotely related to getting to know each other or build trust... they're strictly either sales profiling or, more commonly, things she throws out because we're engaging her in the conversation. IMO, these are the "what's your major" college line equivalents ... desperate attempts to find something to talk about.
** because we're NOT engaging her in the conversation
I always lead the conversation. If a girl wants to make a good impression, she always lets a guy do that.
A few times total, I have been too tired to verbally entertain the girl. That always pisses them off. Then usually they will never talk to you again. But again, just a couple of times max has that happened to me.
Usually girls on their best behavior smile and nod at everything you say. So in my own way, I am sure to tell them everything they will want to know, so that they don't have to ask.
I interject one caveat, at one club the girls smile and nod at everything you say, until you tell them where you live. Then they interrupt and tell you where they live.
First time I though to myself, "She must be getting a bit tipsy and not realize how that sounds."
That was my first experience with the underground circuit of more extreme clubs. The girls know exactly what they are doing. And they really do know how to make a guy feel like a king.
SJG
Thelonious Monk, Dizzy Gillespie, Giants Of Jazz Copenhagen 1971 youtube.com
-->"Usually girls on their best behavior smile and nod at everything you say. So in my own way, I am sure to tell them everything they will want to know, so that they don't have to ask."
SJG, when I say I "lead the conversation", I definitely do it differently than you, I reckon . I have no idea what they will want to know, and they're adults so they can ask if they do want to know... you risk blabbling on and on interminably if you just perform a soliloquy on what you presume they want to hear. When I say "lead the conversation", I mean I lead it into fun topics that are completely interactive, I definitely don't monopolize the conversation, talk about myself at length on the assumption that that's what she needs to know about, etc. I just want to get us to conversations where we're both laughing and telling stories
Subraman posted above, " ...I just see no reason to sit through my one-zilliionth round of "what do you do?" "where do you live?" "do you come here a lot?" with a stripper, when I could be talking about more fun things."
Well, all I can say is that in my experience, girls are always judging and screening guys. It is completely unfair, and all of it is double edged. But in my experience, there are things a girl needs to know before she will open up to a guy. She will talk about herself, and generally women are quite open. But she needs to hear certain things from the guy first, he has to make the show of openness and non-defensiveness. And in my experience, there are some types of things which girls perk right up to.
Yes, it is all unfair, but if you want to deal with them, you need to learn how to meet their expectations, while at the same time not letting them think that you can be pushed around or interrogated.
And yes, having fun with them is fine, but it also depends on what you and she think are fun. I have always found that girls really do respond positively when they can see that you are making at least a bit of tactful effort to impress them.
And again, it depends upon what sort of an outcome you want. Do you want the girl to take real interest in you, and in a completely civilian way?
I treat all girls as civilians, and it all situations.
SJG
Jimmy Smith - All the Best (FULL ALBUM) youtube.com
if it's not a 'wanna dance' girl, it's a 'want some company' girl Dancers ask the same questions. not because they want to run game, but because they are in auto-pilot. most won't even remember anything about you including your name once they move on.
the girls that make the most money remember every last detail about you, and ask about you when you come back in.