tuscl

Heart stopper

Avatar for gawker
gawkerOlder than dirt

I've previously described how my years with my ATF have come to an end. I've reached out to my #2 and no response. My #3 lives further assay but I texted her to see what's up. She texted right back: "Guess what? I'm pregnant and you're gunna be a daddy!"
WTF? I'm 70 years old, only fucked her one time bareback and she's telling me I knocked her up? I wrote back that we need to talk. After 5 minutes she writes back HaHa. "I am pregnant, but I'm pretty sure my BF is the daddy"
She sure has a sick sense of humor. I had a heart attack when I was 54 & quadruple bypass at age 67. This could have been the bjg one.
I'd rather have a stripper cry while fucking her.

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ime

Well at least she is "pretty sure".

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Avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD

Lol. I like her.

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Avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf

Wow. Feel any hint of disappointment when you learned the truth?

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Avatar for mjx01
mjx01

snip, snip

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Avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo

You could've become her sugar-daddy against your will

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warhawks
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rh48hr

Warhawks you beat me to it! I'm coming Elizabeth! Lol

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Avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter

She must have thought that was real funny.

Next time you see her you could tell her about your trip to the ER when you thought you were having a heart attack. Only cost a few thousand after all the doctors saw you, took MRI's etc, etc. Then say you had been planning on spending it all on her with a big party, but oh well, it's all gone now.

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Avatar for JimGassagain
JimGassagain

My daughter won't stop at just one doll, she has to have 5 and insists! I wonder where she gets her ideas from. Well since I'm Catholic it's my religious duty to procreate, but I digress because I think it would be good for Gawker to have another little one running around. Kids keep you young and willing to continue to fuck young strippers. I know the old saying your only as old as the girl you're fucking. That changes when u have a heart attack.

For me, it's the over abundance of pastrami sandwiches I order at the second avenue deli that will give me my first heart attack. Jeannie my wife says, "Jim, don't you want to be there when your daughters get married?" And I respond, "Not really! Wait a minute will there be ice scream at this wedding because if u can promise.....No I still don't want to go."

I mean who wants to pay for an awkward party anyway?

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Avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234

It's funny - but knowing your medical issues - it's dangerous. She's young - with a sense of humor - and she definitely got you.

I like that she's pretty sure it's her boyfriend who's the father! Her boyfriend must feel very special!

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