Awkward Club Experiences

29 comments

• shailynn

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  8 years ago

  At least she didn't fall over. There was this semi cute but awkward dancer thy worked at a Detroit club. She sat down and blurted outc "I've seen you in here before," (and told me the exact dates which were months ago) "and I have a major crush on you." Great but she wasn't my type at all and I tried to subtly get rid of her but it didn't work. She stayed and we chatted and she actually was a cool girl, I just had zero attraction. The shot girl came by and tried to force me to buy her a shot, but this dancer was not allowed to drink because she was on probation. I tried to shoo off the shot girl without "outing" the dancer but she was so persistent eventually I just had to tell her off. Everything's going great right? Out of pity I took the dancer up for a 2 song dance and a tried to make the best of it. My hand brushed hear her crotch and she said "wait I'm on my period" but I can do other things to you. Mind you I wasn't trying to stick my fingers down her g-string. She giggled and stared into my eyes the entire time and fumbled because she was so nervous. To make matters worse she had a BO smell because she forgot to put deodorant on (my words not hers). At the end of the 2 dances she said "that's the most horrible job I've ever done and I'm sorry, I'm not goi to charge you." I told her "time is money" and paid her anyway. After that she left me alone the rest of the night and I have never seen her again. This was a high tier club and she had no business working there to begin with. It goes to prove being polite doesn't always pay off.
• san_jose_guy

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  8 years ago

  Mr. OP, you don't need to agree to the dance, but you should learn how to talk to girls some. ANd if you like her you can feed her front room money, and perhaps start getting extremely friendly with her. SJG King Crimson - Live in Hyde Park (1969) - Complete Performance [view link]
• maho

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  8 years ago

  For me it's when I tip a girl super hot girl on stage and she says she will stop over when finished. She has maybe 4-5 dances though to do on stage at different spots (think bigger clubs with multiple poles where a dancer does one dance each per pole). As the dancer is wrapping up her stage set and presumably is going to head over to my table, a dancer circulating the floor uninvitingly plops down at my table and wants to introduce herself and start talking. In a panic of losing the girl I've tipped on stage who is about to head over to my table but will go elsewhere as she sees me with someone else, I somehow (politely) have to try and get rid of the girl at my table asap. Can be a little awkward sometimes for me I guess.
• Papi_Chulo

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  8 years ago

  I'm not a big stage tipper - sometimes I'll be sitting at a table away from the stage and will be debating in my mind whether to get up and go tip the girl - a time or two I have finally made up my mind to get up and go tip the girl on stage but by the time I get there her song has just ended as I am at the stage and she turns around and leaves the stage - kinda awkward that you're walking thru the floor up to the stage and then get there and have to make a PL u-turn
• maho

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  8 years ago

  LOL....PL U-turn. Somewhat related, but sometimes I'll see a girl on stage who is hot and I go to tip her, but when I hear her speak I literally get so turned off that I end up hoping she doesn't stop by my table when finished on stage. If she does make her way over, I somehow have to wiggle out of the message I'm sending of tipping her on stage, but not wanting to talk further, let alone go to VIP.
• lopaw

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  8 years ago

  I've had 2 different dancers start their periods while they were giving me a nude dance. Awkward doesn't even begin to cover that.
• Lone_Wolf

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  8 years ago

  Lopaw for the win! Hard to top that.
• StPaul101

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  8 years ago

  I was sitting at a high table watching the stage show and a new dancer comes over and asks me if I wanted a dance. I'll grab 1 dance from any stripper that asks just to check things out (most of the time), in this case she starts dancing for me and I made the mistake of asking how her night was going. She starts crying and cant stop, she says she is concerned that you can see the scar of the C-section she had. She had been dancing in a small town SC and didnt feel comfortable dancing at the bigger club (full Nude). When the song was over i didnt know what to do and said sure i would take another dance, how do you say no to a dancer crying in your lap. I eventually got 4 dances from her and she inflated her count on me at the end but i was happy that ride was over and just paid her.
• K

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  8 years ago

  Lopaw wins. I am almost jealous as those would make great stories.
• sclvr5005

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  8 years ago

  Yikes lopaw. That's so nasty. Probably the most awkward thing that has ever happened was when a dancer farted during our dance. Thank God it wasn't stinky but she was mortified and I tried to play it off but she knew that I knew so game over.
• Timex345

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  8 years ago

  There are so many for me. It is hard for me to remember some of them. Probably walking back to the private dance area to see if a favorite was dancing for a customer tops my list. Waiting longer than I should in an empty club during the day shift right after opening is another. In general, being a customer at a showclub is simply awkward in itself. I think there is something wrong with me but oh well at least I am not harming anyone with my favorite hobby.
• gammanu95

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  8 years ago

  I was at one of these Ft. Myers clubs getting a lap dance from a cute little blonde, and she fell asleep mid-grind. She looked so cute that I let her sleep out the rest of the song and shook her awake to pay her.
• Timex345

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  8 years ago

  I waved to a fav. as she entered the club to visit a friend briefly. She was not working. Her date was right behind her. I didn't realize they were together at the time. They both left after 10 minutes. She went to the dressing room and he waited. Awkward. I still wander why he didn't wait for her in the car. I know no situation is perfect. But, I did wander if this was a pay for play situation or if they were dating. I could have asked but I have learned to mind my own business and just enjoy who is working. Her friend is another fav. of mine.
• Timex345

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  8 years ago

  My truck would not start after a visit. I had to go to a restaurant next store to use a phone. The tow truck showed up and the driver asked where I was parked. I sheepishly pointed over to the SC's parking lot. The look of outright disapproval was very apparent on the driver's face. Awkward. That is probably tops on my list.
• Timex345

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  8 years ago

  I can relate to so many of these experiences. Especially trying to not be rude to girls as you try to get rid of them.
• magicrat

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  8 years ago

  I was with a favorite and another dancer comes up and asks me if I had a condom.
• Papi_Chulo

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  8 years ago

  ^ LOL - strippers - you gotta love'm - thank god they exist
• RandomMember

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  8 years ago

  Not so much a club experience, but locked my keys in the trunk at a hotel parking lot, immediately after an OTC session. Sort of ruined the experience. No rude questions from the locksmith who came out.
• TxVegas

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  8 years ago

  I was at Platinum Plus in Columbia SC several years ago when a dancer I knew came in to work the day shift. She got dressed and came out and sat down with me, so I was her first customer at the club that day. She usually gave good two way contact dancers, but had never offered extras beyond a quick hand up the shorts or allowing FIV. She told me she was horny because she and her bf had broken up three weeks before and she was hoping to have fun at work. (Who knows if the backstory was true.) I agree to a two for $x and we had two good dances. She was doing that hot air blow through the pants move at the end of the second dance when I noticed unusual warmth and wetness. She had taken me out and was sucking me. (She had never done this before and we had not dicsussed the possibility.). She kept at it and positioned herself where I could finger her. Another dancer came in and said quite loudly, "For God sakes XXXX, you have to go to VIP for that." So, she stops as I am on the brink and then zips me up. A few seconds later a bouncer comes in and checks out the situation, having heard the other girl I assume. I have no idea what the protocol is at that point. Am I supposed to get up and leave the lap dance area. Should I take off totally. Do we keep dancing with normal lap dance room rules. She looks at me and just laughs after the bouncer leaves and says, "Thanks YYYY for outing me so loudly. Next time go make an announcement from the DJ booth." The other girl laughs and apologizes and offers to stand guard after her one dance is over. I still have no idea what I should do. My dancer says, I owe you a finish. So, letting the little head do my thinking, I let her pull me out and finish. I don't last another song and she makes a big point of swallowing and tells me that she has to get rid of the evidence. I am still in a "what the fuck just happened daze" when she goes out and sits with another customer and I take my original seat two tables away from them. They appear to know each other and exchange a hug and quick kiss. So, now I add to the awkwardness by knowing she is now kissing a guy after swallowing my cum and not going back to the dressing room. At this point I just leave, left to ponder the surreal last twenty minutes of my life.
• rh48hr

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  8 years ago

  Lopaw wins the awkward moment challenge hands down.
• dudefromsd

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  8 years ago

  There was a girl that was about 2 or 3 on my depth chart at a no-extras club, then she moved to a moderate-extas club and became to a favorite. She did a lot gear shifting and the blowing the hot air on my junk through the pants like Tx mentions above, lots of sucking on her nipples etc. She eventually ended up at my regular club that was full-on extras and did full nude dances in vip. When I ran into her, I took her straight to VIP. VIP was going great, lots of two way touching, I finally got to play with her pussy, so naturally I take out the dick. She says "what are you doing? You can't do that!" Huh? I do that here every visit I think. I put my junk away and the rest of the dance is as awkward as you'd imagine. I give here a good tip and I never see her again. I don't know if she moved, retired, or what. I don't see here at any of the clubs in town ever again.
• larryfisherman

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  8 years ago

  @StPaul101- typical stripper for you, you're nice to them, and then they take advantage of you! Heartless.
• Papi_Chulo

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  8 years ago

  LOL – I kid you not – I thought about this thread last-night while getting a lap-dance @ Tootsies Miami. I had a late dinner close to 11 pm and then went to Tootsies – I guess getting LDs while digestion is in full-effect may have its issues. I was sitting on the vinyl bench-seat of the semi-open lap-dance booth getting a dance from a Puerto Rican with a HUGE ass (black-brickhouse sized ass although she was white-Latin but w/ naturally tanned skin) – she is standing in front of me bending-over showing me her HUGE ass - I was sitting back in the seat kinda in a reclined position and went to sit-up so I could burry my PL-face in her HUGE ass – as I am sitting up my butt kinda loses contact w/ the seat a bit and out of nowhere there was an audible fart – LOL – she’d had to have heard-it but didn’t say anything – at least it was a benign fart in that it didn’t stink (kinda like trapped air I guess) – but anyway as soon as that happened I kinda laughed inside thinking of this thread – LOL.
• Bavarian

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  8 years ago

  Lol Papi It could have been worse. What if SHE had fart while you had your face buried in her massive ass?
• bvino

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  8 years ago

  I was in a VIP closet once and another customer tripped over my feet while passing to his private moment ." No problem" I said as he mumbled his apologies. At that point he toppled into my private affair and knocked the girl over , who, being on her knees, was unstable. The bouncer came over as I may have aid "WTF!" a little loudly. Awkward for him, funny for me and dangerous for the sweetie just trying to earn a buck. I got a free drink out of it and the first half of a BJ for free as well.
• vincemichaels

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  8 years ago

  Nice one, Papi !! LOL
• shadowcat

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  8 years ago

  Most of the time the music is so loud you can be pretty confident that nobody hears you fart. :)
• Papi_Chulo

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  8 years ago

  Tootsies is a big commercial type building w/ 2-story high ceilings so the music does not feel that loud at all & even less in the semi-enclosed LD area - I'm sure she heard it LOL
• vincemichaels

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  8 years ago

  Yeah, I agree that the music isn't overpowering there. Lap dances can be great there with the right dancer.