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Wal-Mart Job Interview

440viking
440viking103458

FUCK IT!

10 yrs ago · 2 min read

AKA a tribute to CrazyJoe

An office manager at Wal-Mart was given the task of hiring an Individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?" He looked at the first man on his right. The man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the Fastest thing I know of." "That's very good!" replied the interviewer. "And now you sir?" he asked the second man. "Hmm.... let me see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of." "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliche for speed." He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of." The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. "It's hard to beat the speed of light," he said. Turning to Bubba, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. Old Bubba replied, "After hearing the three previous answers. "It's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA." "WHAT!" said the interviewer, stunned by the response? "Oh I can explain." said Old Bubba. "You see the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but, before I could THINK, BLINK, Or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already shit in my pants."

Old Bubba is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you !!!!

Replies (16)Latest

S
Supremeruler

Lol that's funny.

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san_jose_guy

Well, in a way the guy is right. I mean, I don't worry about any of those other things, but diarrhea has gotten me the same way, and that is not fun at all.

SJG

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shailynn

Crazyjoe as a Wal-Mart greeter. I love it!!!!

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mrrock

I thought the funniest part is people meeting "qualifications" to work at Walmart!

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san_jose_guy

^^^^ Yes that would be something.

How about instead as strip club DJ? Or maybe something even wilder?

SJG

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motorhead

"crazy" is an official disability covered by the ADA (ask Dougster our professional psychologist)

by hiring Joe, Wal-Mart is just fulfilling their quota

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shailynn

^^^ Most of the Wal-Marts I have visited are obviously hitting the mark way over their quota.

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san_jose_guy

How about working in a porno video store? Guy who used to work at my favorite store was way over the top. He would qualify as 'crazy'.

How about at some of these most respectable of places where they have hostess dancing or hostess porno watching, right behind a porno store?

CrazyJoe at the counter, and selling the tickets to the back area?

How about SJG doing that?

SJG

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Cashman1234

Ok - I'm confused. They ask those greeters to provide resumes? I thought they checked the registered sex offenders list - and crossed their fingers...

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440viking

Just to clarify, I wasn't insinuating that Joe is or should be a Wal-Mart greeter, my comment was regarding shit in the joke.

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crazyjoe

Thats funny

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crazyjoe

What would Crazyjoe do as a greeter at Walmart? Hmm

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JohnSmith69

Just found this picture of Joe on his first day of work.

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rockstar666

I would have thought in TUSCL, the version of this joke has four women looking for the job, and after each gives the answer, the one that got the job was the one with the biggest tits.

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san_jose_guy

At Wal-Mart I think it would be the one who is the most subservient who gets the job.

SJG

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JuiceBox69

Lol very good

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