How to ask for DATY

41 comments

• Bavarian

  •

  8 years ago

  Can I go down on you?
• mikeya02

  •

  8 years ago

  It took me too long to learn not to ask a girl a question
• footballguy

  •

  8 years ago

  I've only DATY on my ATF but I could have also done it to two other dances but I didn't want to cause they offered after just a couple songs so there's was no telling who DATY on them right before me. But with all three dancers (after they had no problem with me fingering them) they stood up on the couch and put their pussy practically on my mouth and held it there for more than a few seconds. The first time my ATF did this I didn't do anything about it. But the next time she did it I started licking and she didn't pull away at all. Then on another visit she was laying on the couch madturbating herself, I slowly started kissing her inn thigh gradually getting closer to her pussy. She started moving herself closer to me so that was a pretty obvious sign. The other two put their pussy almost on my mouth and pulled away after I didn't do anything, I could tell it was an invitation to DATY though.
• san_jose_guy

  •

  8 years ago

  In AMPs I never have asked for it, I just do it. Usually it is after a good deal of DFKing, titty squeezing, and FOV. Often will be preceded by or done with FIV. Better that way, treating the girl like a civilian and ravaging her. In the Mexican Bar underground table dancing circuit, girl gets her arm around my neck and is nuzzling, I soften her up further with words, then go to open tongue kissing. She engages immediately, and then reciprocates by getting face up on all fours on top of me and the chair and gives me covered pussy in face. So again, if this is to escalate in private space, there isn't any need to talk about anything. Where ever possible, best to just make it happen with your girl, and starting where ever you are, instead of discussing any choreography with her. Other girls have given me uncovered pussy right in face where I was sitting. Lots of things are possible. But lets look at a tough situation, say in a Deja Vu clip joint, where they have gotten the girls to agree to no front room touching, and they all refuse to kiss, They say they can do more in the booths, but not kissing. Now if treated right they sometimes will reverse themselves on this. But when you can't get physical until you make an agreement with the girl and go into the booth, then often she will be implicitly offering Dry Humping, HJ, BJ. So to get DATY instead I have said things like, "I want to give you some nice slow and gentle pussy licking." ( usually this will be after we are back on the front room couch after a basic introductory dance and she is expecting me to ask for Dry Humping, HJ, BJ, or maybe even FS. ) Using harsh sounding language is better for shock value talk, if talk is all you are going to do. But if you intend to really do it, then softer sounding language works better in my opinion. It puts the girl at ease, as she is hearing that her pleasure is your objective. So it has always worked for me. One girl replied, "Do you mean you want to eat me out?" It was nominally $20 per song. But they always wanted $40 for the "best dance". I got her to agree to 3 songs for $80, good price! She explained that she could not take a full 3 songs of that. She was right, she was extremely responsive! Afterwards the effects of that really showed in her countenance. They don't get that all the time. BUT, she kept her hands close by at all times, so I was mouth only with her, but still good. Another one, similar set up, she was extremely responsive and my face was covered in her juices. Then later we did it again where I had explained, "I want to use my hands and gently spread you so that I can see you and do you better." They seem to go for this sort of talk. And again, that type of talk is only for when following thru is proximal. And the girls is clearly surprised that I am not asking for my own ejaculation or FS. Not interested in my own solo ejaculation, and especially without DFKing, and I don't think that environment and the way the time and money work are good for FS. So she had me wash my hands. I always wash and prepare by trimming and filing my nails any way. I showed her my hands pre washed and she agreed they were clean. Then I washed as she asked and then touched nothing and came out with hands still wet. We discussed whether it should be done in the fantasy room with the gyno table and stirrups, or just in a regular booth. We decided on the latter. It went really well. She was very softened up and gave me her phone number for OTC. Both these girls reversed themselves on the kissing prohibition too. But being given some DFKing is not the same as a girl who just lets you have your way making out with her and sending her into orbit. I'm glad I did what I did. Not interested in being left with blue balls. My own ejaculation is something to save for another time. Really, like JamesSD says, I'd rather keep the sexual tension there. So I do her. I figured out that that is the way out of Blue Balls Extortion. But I would not want to make a habit of spending money in such places. I want GFE-FS, or I want the girl for toda la noche. Otherwise I think it is just a "clip joint". In AMPs now, usually the girls will yield to DFKing because I flirt with them in the selection process and I really turn on the charm and get them relaxed and then with zero verbal warning I'll just kiss her. And I kiss her like I really mean it. And then after that there is no discussion about anything, its titty squeezing, licking, and sucking, and whole front side massage, and FOV. FIV, DATY, w/ FIV, sometimes thumb too, and sometimes as in 69ing, and more BBBJ, and then FS. Sometimes cuddling and talking and a second round. Then I hand them money and it is clear that what she really wants is for me to walk her out the front door with me. They don't discuss money before hand in the South Bay shops now, as this way it is much harder for LE to bust them. You want your words to be soothing and relaxing, and not escort lingo. "Can I pleasure you ?" is the right tone, but it is too imprecise. "I want to give you some slow and gentle pussy licking" has worked well for me. But like I said, the best situations are ones where you don't need to say anything, you just flirt with her and come on to her and she yields fully. SJG My Funny Valentine - Miles Davis [1964] [view link]
• Dominic77

  •

  8 years ago

  ^LOL @ Blue Balls Extortion! Good that you offered her plenty of time so she could feel relaxed for her pleasure, compensated, of course. ;) the softer, civilian like phrasing undoubtedly helps. Good tips.
• JuiceBox69

  •

  8 years ago

  Don't ask mo head...just beat around Da Bush lol
• MrDeuce

  •

  8 years ago

  Personally I wouldn't ask for it, but if the opportunity arises with the right dancer, I won't turn it down. On three occasions in the last couple of years in the VIP room of a certain club, a fresh clean pussy presented itself at the same time that my dick somehow found itself in a stripper's mouth and it seemed only proper to return the favor. In answer to your question, if I were to ask I would echo Bavarian: "Can I go down on you?"
• IwillLapAdancer

  •

  8 years ago

  "Girl, you look so good, I'd like to sop you up with a biscuit." On second thoughts, don't use that. I would go with the Bavarian's suggestion of, "Can I go down on you?"
• san_jose_guy

  •

  8 years ago

  Asking really should be the last recourse. In places where you can just play with your girl, that is best. And IMHO, best is in the front room, right were you sit. But in the strict clip joints, you always have to discuss what will happen before you commit to pay and enter the booth. And it is in these highly controlled places which emphasize 'extras' that I have found DATYing girls to be an outstanding alternative. So there I do discuss it. SJG
• san_jose_guy

  •

  8 years ago

  Go Down, and Eat You Out, are understood by most people, but there is still ambiguity and these are euphemisms. So I have found, "slow and gentle pussy licking", and even, "I want to give you some slow and gentle pussy licking" to be effective, 100% success rate. SJG
• shailynn

  •

  8 years ago

  I'd like to kiss your lips, ah no, the other ones.
• JohnSmith69

  •

  8 years ago

  You're not asking for it, you are offering it. I tell her that I would like our date to be as pleasant as possible for her, that I've been working diligently to improve my oral skills, and that I would love to have the chance to please her sexually and give her an orgasm if she would like one.
• mikeya02

  •

  8 years ago

  this is how you do it.... [view link]
• Dur_Flush

  •

  8 years ago

  I don't ask for sin
• lopaw

  •

  8 years ago

  You don't ask. You give, she takes. In my case it's also reciprocal.
• sharkhunter

  •

  8 years ago

  In case some dancers are reading this, not all guys are interested in doing this and I certainly wouldn't do it if I was paying for anything. I probably don't need to worry about running into dancers trying to have sex for free though and getting daty. Based on another thread, I might have crossed that age even though I'm younger than js69.
• Ch3ll

  •

  8 years ago

  I usually say, "Bring it here." or "Let me taste it.". This is only after they've put it in my face a time or two and if there was mileage being had already. With my first favorite, I don't think I asked I just slid the g string to the side and got away with it. From then on I knew what to do when she put it in my face.
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  8 years ago

  I wouldn't know - I'm a vegetarian. Try asking on StripperWeb.
• larryfisherman

  •

  8 years ago

  "Can I make you feel good?"
• shadowcat

  •

  8 years ago

  Like most of us I don't do that for every stripper I get intimate with. If it is OTC, it is a no brainer. Don't even have to ask. ITC is a little more difficult because of the environment but I usually just tell them that I would like to kiss "her". Which led my latest favorite tell me that I needed to come up with a pet name for her pussy. I have decided on "Miss Kitty".
• DandyDan

  •

  8 years ago

  It depends. Most of the time when I DATY, they practically stuff it in my face and I don't even have to ask. My old favorite Angel always used to deny it, but then I did a double with my other old favorite Sugar, who probably had let me do it every time for 2 years by that point. She let me DATY and apparently Angel saw my DATY skills and needed me to do some of that to her. She never refused after that. She always said I was better than her husband, which was probably SS, but who knows for sure.
• bubba267

  •

  8 years ago

  With Ch3ll.... I say, " I love how you look...I want to taste you". It is imperative to have done some finger play and sniff test ahead of this or you might be in for an unpleasant surprise!
• dallas702

  •

  8 years ago

  "That looks good enough to eat. May I have a taste?"
• mrrock

  •

  8 years ago

  Bubba makes a great point. Don't want to daty if it's fishing season!
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  Why would you ask for DATY?
• sclvr5005

  •

  8 years ago

  "Why would you ask for DATY?" If you were into that, why wouldn't you?
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  For one thing, she may have given ITC to a guy just 10 minutes before or just before starting her shift. Mostly, there's no deployable condom for ITC DATY. BJs, yes, eating pussy, no. Seems unfair but there it is. Furthermore, you are far more susceptible to catching STDs through the mucous membranes of your mouth, lips, nose and eyes than your cock. If you don't care about that, then by all means, ask. For my own protection, I don't give oral outside of monogamous relationships.
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  But if you really want to ask, don't ask. I've seen a lot of guys get dragged to the VIP by telling the stripper, "I'm gonna eat that pussy"
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  But if you really want to ask, don't ask. I've seen a lot of guys get dragged to the VIP by telling the stripper, "I'm gonna eat that pussy"
• sclvr5005

  •

  8 years ago

  "there's no deployable condom for ITC DATY. " It's called a dental dam.
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  I know about dental dams. That's why I specified "deployable".
• sclvr5005

  •

  8 years ago

  I have never used one myself, but I have seen them and they are just as "deployable" as rubbers. Or grab a piece of saran wrap and your good to go. What's the issue?
• gammanu95

  •

  8 years ago

  Listen, if you want to eat some guys pubes or cum out of her snatch, or catch warts or herpes (which condoms and dental dams can't always prevent) or worse, I'm not here to stop you. I am going to tell you that it is a stupid unnecessary risk.
• sclvr5005

  •

  8 years ago

  Lmao then just come out and say that rather than hide behind protection ignorance. And I'll be just fine doing what I'm doing.
• san_jose_guy

  •

  8 years ago

  Thank you Lopaw and JS69, for bringing your important insight into this. Like I said, I prefer just to do it, as I am already getting physical with the girl, and so no explanation is needed. But in some of these clip joint style strip clubs where the only thing you can do is ask, "I want to give you some slow and gentle pussy licking" . But understand, that I am already getting extremely verbally flirty with the girl, and probably bending the club rules by at least snuggling up with her, and she is already very softened up, and we have done a preliminary basic dance. And I only go that way with girls I am getting along with and where there seems to be some mutual respect and affinity. Now as far as the issues raised by gammanu95, as I know, women keep their pussies clean. They place a greater emphasis on cleanliness than men do. But also, when you walk into a P4P sex venue, or some sort of a sex club, you are making a statement that you are going to go for it, and not worry much about such concerns. I mean, if you want strict monogamy, then go that way. Go to a church and find yourself a virgin and marry her. But if you are like many of us here, you have largely rejected that, if not already having done it and found it unsatisfactory. We all breath the same air, drink the same water, and are made of the same materials. We are not inanimate objects either, but we share this eco system small insects and micro organisms. None of us are ever fully isolated. My own view is that an excessive concern about hygienic issues is merely class and race based prejudice. One pivotal event for me was a Renaissance Faire Kissing Game. After kissing some of the women, I ended up volunteering and doing hungry kissing with a whole bunch of extremely grabby and aggressive girls from about 15yo to 23yo. My male companions denounced me. But to me, the whole exercise shattered my world view, that people cold be that open, and that it took so little to make it happen. In John Hubner's book about Jim and Artie Mitchell, by then Caan's Film Festival winning porno film makers, he describes how Jim Mitchell's world view was shattered. He attended in Amsterdam a sex club. There were a couple of women performers in this audience participation sex show. Each man paid about $1. Then they lined up and took turns, giving the girl a little wipe off with a moistened towelette, and then giving the girl a few licks. Jim was completely blown away and this is what motivated him to turn his movie theater in to a f2f "sex club". And of course the premise is that since it is not strict 1 on 1, but for audience participation and sexual education by shock value, then it is not prostitution. They had their own DATY facility, an arena like thing. They started with glass viewing windows installed, with the idea that once busted they would up the anti by taking them out. Now of course Diane Feinstein would not accept this. But Jim and Artie were not easily intimidated and so they were acquitted by a jury. Most strip club and prostitution cases never go to trial. The defendants cop a plea, no matter that the evidence is usually poor and improperly obtained. But even more so, as chronicled in detail in Hubner's book with dancer interviews, the girls were on board with this sex education ethic. Many of their customers were business travelers from more conservative parts of the country, where the sexual revolution was slow to come. And then I would get an additional education of my own, having strayed away from a real boring convention at the Moscone Center, I looked for where I might eat lunch. I spotted a super cute black girl. To me she looked like an officer worker on her lunch break. I decided that I would try and take her to lunch. Nothing ventured nothing gained. So laying back on the crowded sidewalks I discretely tailed her. And man was I ever wrong. She ducked into New Century. Never been there, but I knew basically what it was, something like MBOT. This was before booths or back rooms, even before stage side sitting. So I asked about her and they told me her name, Maria. I suspect that she is the one mentioned in Hubner's book, now a medical doctor. So I waited and waited, and finally she was up on stage. I positioned myself so she could see me. She finished her set, in nothing but high heels and makeup, open tongue kissing with another girl. Then she came to my lap. Now they always have girl kissing in porno movies and I just f-fwd passed it. But here in real life it was a powerful turn on. They are showing that they control the erotic realm. It is a display of female power. So I could not resist telling Maria what a turn on that was. So she strategically interrupts me, talking in a manner that black girls often do, and she told me how much she was enjoying it. Well with that kind of a situation, things are going to happen. Were I not married I believe that Maria would have been making my breakfast the next morning. My world has never been the same. Now true, I was dressed nice, and I know that this makes a big difference. But that she could be that open with strangers, and the money is really just a token, just blows me away, even to this day. She changed my world view, and I am still trying to learn to live what I learned from her. She is a treasure. She should be taxpayer supported, rather like in the Pagan Temples of the Ancient World. That little bit of time and saliva sharing with her, has left me a completely changed man. And I'm still trying to move from my miserable bourgeois existence to a life more like hers and more recognizing what she shared with me in that brief encounter. SJG Awesome James Carter Organ Trio - Jazzwoche Burghausen 2004 [view link]
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  8 years ago

  Stick out your tongue & wiggle it suggestively as you point to her cuchie.
• jestrite50

  •

  8 years ago

  Screw It ! Ya just Do It ! You don't ask ! I have never asked. If they don't want you to do it they will stop you. No harm done at least they know you want their pussy. I have never been refused a second time. I can think of once on the first time but never on the second time. Sometimes they need to think through the action. Men just do it and think about it later. Women are more intelligent than men when it comes to having sex. (Usually) LOL,!
• just_the_nuts

  •

  8 years ago

  I agree don't ask Just pull up a chair and eat her pussy and ads hole out like a Chinese buffet
• just_the_nuts

  •

  8 years ago

  Ass not ads lol damn phone
• san_jose_guy

  •

  8 years ago

  "Stick out your tongue & wiggle it suggestively as you point to her cuchie." I have done lots of this when girls are on stage, even at our local no touching clubs where that is all one can do. I'm not pointing with my fingers, but I'm responding to her spreading in front of me. Sometimes I've even added a thumb under my chin to further dramatize what I am communicating to her. In the Brass Rail it is best for stage number 2, of their 4 stages, as that has the most pseudo privacy in viewing angles. But it works in our other local clubs too. It always goes over well and helps get them softened up and off script and being more playful and talkative with me. Stuff that isn't actually sex acts, isn't actually doing it, but instead is communicating about it, is best in situations where that is all you can do. Our local no touching clubs are that way. In less restricted situations, like AMPs, then I just start working my way down and my hands are already on her tits, thighs, ass, and then pussy. But maybe all of this drives home a point, my main point, that clubs where they prohibit front room play are a chumps game, because all you can do is buy dances, after verbally negotiating. These places stink. And they sell a fantasy that a great deal happens, if you are willing to spend lots of money. But most of the time it is not much, and rarely is your girl going to be loosened up and GFE with you when it is set up that way. SJG Jimmy Smith, Any Number Can Win [view link] album cover [view link]
• Subraman

  •

  8 years ago

  May I nibble your notch? May I slurp your "sloppy susan"? May I nom your nub?