My favorite stripper is addicted to Xanax. The drug does have some bad side effects like making her lethargic and spaced out. It also causes her to have a financial strain to keep the drug in supply. I would like to try to figure out the best way to help her kick the habit but it is easier said than done. I don't use drugs, so I cannot fully relate. Has anyone had experience in kicking a drug habit or helping someone else overcome an addiction?
You might want to check with Rick Dugan as he has an enormous amount of experience with exploiting this type of dancer for his own personal gratification.
No, seriously, you might want to check with inpatient drug rehab centers in your area. Does she have insurance?
My ATF has used Xanax and weed on a daily basis for years. She went to rehab a couple years ago, and that helped with her alcohol addiction. She drinks much less, but she still uses weed and Xanax.
What can you do? Not much. You can encourage her to go to rehab, but even if she goes she may not be cured. Drug addicts like their addiction.
Rech +1
The other alternative is to describe panic attacks to your doctor, get a legal scrip for Xanax and trade them with your favorite stripper for blow jobs. Win -win.
You can't get her to kick a Xanax habit - it must be her desire to kick that habit/addiction. If she is at the point where she wants to kick it - that's a good starting point. There are programs to help kick prescription med addictions. You might want to research those programs online - and then discuss it with her.
She will need lots of support and help. The initial detox from Xanax is rough - especially if she's using a prescription Xanax as the amount is steady - and her body is dependent on it daily.
The problem with dancers and Xanax is the withdrawal either mimics the underlying symptoms of *why* she took it in the first place or maybe it's just the underlying symptoms return: {anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks}. The best treat for that is Xanax. Dancers off shift, before bed (go read StripperWeb) often have anxiety, insomnia, and sometime panic attacks and agoraphobia/social anxiety, etc. A lot of that is from the shit they go through during their shift. The other problem is Xanax often makes other substances *more* pleasurable. Alcohol, opiates (Hydrocodone, Heroin), Cocaine, Meth-amphetamines, etc. are often more pleasurable with Xanax. So you kind of need to know what else she is taking.
Substances like Xanax have a physical dependency part, a coping dependency crutch, and a pleasure brain/"reward center" part.
The physical dependency part is perhaps the easiest of the three (IMO), but not by much, but still it can be dealt with. Rehab is one approach. Quitting something like Xanax cold turkey, without professional help/observation may not be advisable. She like likely need to have her dosage monitored and brought down gradually. The body will adapt, but she will have withdrawl symptoms (anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks / social anxiety, agoraphobia). Time fixes these, as the body with adapt. She may be able to cope with the insomnia with a sleeping pill (1, one only!) like Ambian. NO ALCOHOL! She will also need to address the causes of the underlying symptoms of anxiety -- the ones that drove her to talk Xanax or drove her Doctor to prescribe it (or maybe the dancers in the Dressing Room at work suggested it). She may need to switch to a low contact / air dance club is the anxiety is cause by stress or PTS from lap dancing or prostitution. Also part of the withdrawal from most any physical dependency, is she will feel like *shit*. She's probably to the point where her body needs the substance to feel "normal." So taking that away from her is going to cause the body to feel like shit. Alcoholics understand this. I have an alcohol dependency, so I am aware of this. The solution for that is time and someone "needs to sit on her." Unless you or someone else can devote a lot of time to her, rehab (outsourcing it) it a good option.
For coping, anyone who has tried (successfully or unsuccessfully) to quick smoking tobacco should be able to relate. Here she needs to find a new way to cope with stress or sudden stressful situations. Maybe she could get a Stretch Armstrong (the toy with a stretchy arms, from the '90s) or some Baoding balls (ying yang balls). I use angry Death Metal music, myself. Or I see dancers. Obviously those are specific to me. But she will need to find a new coping mechanism; else she will be in danger of relapse. This is the stage where I see a lot of people fail.
The pleasure / "reward center" of the brain is centered in the "she's only going to change if she wants to change" bit. Substances like Xanax mess with the reward center in the brain. It makes things that feel good -- feel really, really good. And likewise, things that feel bad -- feel really, really bad. She has to recalibrate this herself using outside therapy and outside encouragement (love). My brother used to sell and use drugs. His out-of-cuff solution for this is to "live under a bridge." She may need to hit rock bottom before she can change.
--> And that's all in addition to what the others are saying about "wanting/needing to change before you can change." -->
My final advice is to you. What or why are you asking for all of this? What do you want out of it? And how often do you see this woman? In the club only? Or do you see her outside of the club? Do you have an existing relationship with her? The reason I say this, and I say this from experience, is if you are going through all of this (white knight) as a way to earn her favor and become (tada!) her boyfriend/husband, don't. It probably won't work. The normal relationship status of someone who *does* all of this is *already* a family member, a husband, or a deep friend, who loves this woman on some level -- and the woman loves him or her back. That's the type of person who goes to *this* *level* of effort. If you do all of this as her acquaintance -- you are going to get friend-zoned. And no amount of additional energy expenditure is likely to change that status. So don't do this thinking she will 'incubate' and at the end, out will 'pop' a girlfriend/fiancé/wife. It just doesn’t work that way. You are friend-zoned. But, however, helping her would make you are very decent human being.
Many times I wanted to save the DS from the drug fueled spiral that she was in as a stripper. But I couldn't. Because I'm her customer, not her savior. You too are this girls customer, nothing more. You may be a very good customer, but still you're just a customer.
The DS saved herself. She quit stripping, she got off most of the drugs, and she has her life on a very good track. But she did that all herself. I didn't and couidnt help except to pay her money.
I would stay out of it and find another favorite. This is supposed to be about entertainment and girls who are fucked up on Xanax or heroin or are jonesing for a fix tend not to be very much fun.
But some guys crave the drama in their lives and perhaps you are one of them. There are guys on here who have spent obscene amounts of money and emotional energy chasing after drug addicted girls who will never reciprocate their feelings, but I guess that it fills some hole for them while they do it.
It can be dangerous to quit xanax or other benzodiazipines cold turkey. She'll need to taper her usage over time, assuming she actually wants to quit. Many drug users acknowledge that they need to quit but are unwilling or unable to do the work necessary to actually quit.
On a related note, I question whether her xanax use is really causing financial difficulties. Xanax is relatively cheap, even at street prices (check out streetrx.com for drug street prices in your area). Perhaps she's using xanax to potentiate other drugs that you're unaware of.
I've never had to kick a drug habit, but there are plenty in my family who are/were addicted to drugs and I had to deal with it. The thing you need to understand is you cannot help her, besides giving emotional support, until she is ready to get clean. She can check into a rehab or tell her doctor so he can help her taper off the xanax - if she is actually physically addicted to it, quitting cold turkey could be deadly. Xanax withdrawal is more dangerous than heroin withdrawal and can kill you. My mom has been taking xanax off and on for years and didn't know about the horrible withdrawal effects until I told her about it recently. I was researching it online, and seizures as well as horrific hallucinations were very common for people who try to tried to quit cold turkey.
Of course, it depends how many she takes per day. I have panic disorder and it ruins my life. I have general anxiety at least every single day. I just went to a new doctor who is more liberal about xanax than other doctors. Since it was my first time seeing her, she asked me to explain my anxiety and when I tried, I burst into tears. It hinders my life so much that talking about it with the Dr made me incredibly emotional. She wrote me a prescription for 60 one mg pills. That's 2mg per day, and the most I've ever been prescribed (usually 30). When I have bad panic attacks, 1mg is enough to level me out. That's why I don't get all lethargic and spaced out, because I take it as prescribed. I cannot take it recreationally. It helps me cope with life. However, I have stopped taking it for days and never got any withdrawals, thank god. So while I'm not addicted, I know the potential danger of getting addicted, and make sure I'm not taking more than I absolutely need for that reason.
^^^^ With all due respect to you Nina, I hope you find a path to contain any anxiety attacks you may experience. Only those who've been through them can understand and those who haven't simply think it's weakness. I've never understood the debilitating pressure panic attacks can bring to a good person when loved ones were going through them, until I experienced a long duration of stress from life circumstances that put me almost spiraling into one. Most people can snap back easily from stressful situations, yet the ones who need Xanax have a high energy brain wired to be under stress at all times and it's difficult to get any reprieve.
As someone who has barely experienced thus unknowing difficulty yet witnessed first hand how challenging it can be for loved ones, please take time to handle your anxiety and depression. It can save your life. Exercise and diet us a good start, but I've also learned staying off the computer and smart phones will also help, as those are triggers that tend to "seduce" the mind, but actually increase anxiety without realizing it. If anyone can stay away from Xanax or as SJG states "psychiatric medicine" the better the long term strategy. I power down and stay away from all electronics for a couple days and work out and plan good quality meals for the week to keep anxiety away. Also the strip club environs are highly toxic to inducing anxiety.
Thanks for all the great commentary everyone. I know she also smokes weed and likely does other drugs too but I am not sure what. We go on dates, sleep together and are pretty close but it likely will not develop into anything long-term as she has all sorts of issues even beyond the drugs and generally has a lifestyle just too wild for my taste. Obviously I care for her and even if we stop seeing each other I hope that she can go clean and improve her life as what she is doing now is very self-destructive.
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No, seriously, you might want to check with inpatient drug rehab centers in your area. Does she have insurance?
What can you do? Not much. You can encourage her to go to rehab, but even if she goes she may not be cured. Drug addicts like their addiction.
The other alternative is to describe panic attacks to your doctor, get a legal scrip for Xanax and trade them with your favorite stripper for blow jobs. Win -win.
She will need lots of support and help. The initial detox from Xanax is rough - especially if she's using a prescription Xanax as the amount is steady - and her body is dependent on it daily.
The problem with dancers and Xanax is the withdrawal either mimics the underlying symptoms of *why* she took it in the first place or maybe it's just the underlying symptoms return: {anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks}. The best treat for that is Xanax. Dancers off shift, before bed (go read StripperWeb) often have anxiety, insomnia, and sometime panic attacks and agoraphobia/social anxiety, etc. A lot of that is from the shit they go through during their shift. The other problem is Xanax often makes other substances *more* pleasurable. Alcohol, opiates (Hydrocodone, Heroin), Cocaine, Meth-amphetamines, etc. are often more pleasurable with Xanax. So you kind of need to know what else she is taking.
Substances like Xanax have a physical dependency part, a coping dependency crutch, and a pleasure brain/"reward center" part.
The physical dependency part is perhaps the easiest of the three (IMO), but not by much, but still it can be dealt with. Rehab is one approach. Quitting something like Xanax cold turkey, without professional help/observation may not be advisable. She like likely need to have her dosage monitored and brought down gradually. The body will adapt, but she will have withdrawl symptoms (anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks / social anxiety, agoraphobia). Time fixes these, as the body with adapt. She may be able to cope with the insomnia with a sleeping pill (1, one only!) like Ambian. NO ALCOHOL! She will also need to address the causes of the underlying symptoms of anxiety -- the ones that drove her to talk Xanax or drove her Doctor to prescribe it (or maybe the dancers in the Dressing Room at work suggested it). She may need to switch to a low contact / air dance club is the anxiety is cause by stress or PTS from lap dancing or prostitution. Also part of the withdrawal from most any physical dependency, is she will feel like *shit*. She's probably to the point where her body needs the substance to feel "normal." So taking that away from her is going to cause the body to feel like shit. Alcoholics understand this. I have an alcohol dependency, so I am aware of this. The solution for that is time and someone "needs to sit on her." Unless you or someone else can devote a lot of time to her, rehab (outsourcing it) it a good option.
For coping, anyone who has tried (successfully or unsuccessfully) to quick smoking tobacco should be able to relate. Here she needs to find a new way to cope with stress or sudden stressful situations. Maybe she could get a Stretch Armstrong (the toy with a stretchy arms, from the '90s) or some Baoding balls (ying yang balls). I use angry Death Metal music, myself. Or I see dancers. Obviously those are specific to me. But she will need to find a new coping mechanism; else she will be in danger of relapse. This is the stage where I see a lot of people fail.
The pleasure / "reward center" of the brain is centered in the "she's only going to change if she wants to change" bit. Substances like Xanax mess with the reward center in the brain. It makes things that feel good -- feel really, really good. And likewise, things that feel bad -- feel really, really bad. She has to recalibrate this herself using outside therapy and outside encouragement (love). My brother used to sell and use drugs. His out-of-cuff solution for this is to "live under a bridge." She may need to hit rock bottom before she can change.
--> And that's all in addition to what the others are saying about "wanting/needing to change before you can change." -->
My final advice is to you. What or why are you asking for all of this? What do you want out of it? And how often do you see this woman? In the club only? Or do you see her outside of the club? Do you have an existing relationship with her? The reason I say this, and I say this from experience, is if you are going through all of this (white knight) as a way to earn her favor and become (tada!) her boyfriend/husband, don't. It probably won't work. The normal relationship status of someone who *does* all of this is *already* a family member, a husband, or a deep friend, who loves this woman on some level -- and the woman loves him or her back. That's the type of person who goes to *this* *level* of effort. If you do all of this as her acquaintance -- you are going to get friend-zoned. And no amount of additional energy expenditure is likely to change that status. So don't do this thinking she will 'incubate' and at the end, out will 'pop' a girlfriend/fiancé/wife. It just doesn’t work that way. You are friend-zoned. But, however, helping her would make you are very decent human being.
Here’s a tumblr post that explains that last paragraph:
http://www.tumbex.com/tumblr/selinastrip…
Take care,
Dominic
The DS saved herself. She quit stripping, she got off most of the drugs, and she has her life on a very good track. But she did that all herself. I didn't and couidnt help except to pay her money.
But some guys crave the drama in their lives and perhaps you are one of them. There are guys on here who have spent obscene amounts of money and emotional energy chasing after drug addicted girls who will never reciprocate their feelings, but I guess that it fills some hole for them while they do it.
The only hole they should be filling is the vagina.
On a related note, I question whether her xanax use is really causing financial difficulties. Xanax is relatively cheap, even at street prices (check out streetrx.com for drug street prices in your area). Perhaps she's using xanax to potentiate other drugs that you're unaware of.
Please note the addendum:
"Addendum: 99.999999% of the time, trying to "save" a stripper will end miserably and with a visible mushroom cloud."
Of course, it depends how many she takes per day. I have panic disorder and it ruins my life. I have general anxiety at least every single day. I just went to a new doctor who is more liberal about xanax than other doctors. Since it was my first time seeing her, she asked me to explain my anxiety and when I tried, I burst into tears. It hinders my life so much that talking about it with the Dr made me incredibly emotional. She wrote me a prescription for 60 one mg pills. That's 2mg per day, and the most I've ever been prescribed (usually 30). When I have bad panic attacks, 1mg is enough to level me out. That's why I don't get all lethargic and spaced out, because I take it as prescribed. I cannot take it recreationally. It helps me cope with life. However, I have stopped taking it for days and never got any withdrawals, thank god. So while I'm not addicted, I know the potential danger of getting addicted, and make sure I'm not taking more than I absolutely need for that reason.
As someone who has barely experienced thus unknowing difficulty yet witnessed first hand how challenging it can be for loved ones, please take time to handle your anxiety and depression. It can save your life. Exercise and diet us a good start, but I've also learned staying off the computer and smart phones will also help, as those are triggers that tend to "seduce" the mind, but actually increase anxiety without realizing it. If anyone can stay away from Xanax or as SJG states "psychiatric medicine" the better the long term strategy. I power down and stay away from all electronics for a couple days and work out and plan good quality meals for the week to keep anxiety away. Also the strip club environs are highly toxic to inducing anxiety.