I had no idea that women have a part of their anatomy called the mons veneria.
OK. Some of you are going to say I’m lying. I admit that up front. If some of you posted this, I would wonder to.
But I swear this really happened. I am not making this up. It is just my life with strippers. Seriously, has anyone ever heard of this before?
I just fucked a stripper with a crooked vagina.
Back up slightly and let me explain. I’m at an extras club getting a few dancers from an 8 that I’ve met a couple of times in the past. She’s really pushing the VIP room. I say no because she will only do a covered blow job, and the price is high. But she says I can fuck her, and she promises me that she’s a great fuck. I’m high, of course, so the little head is convinced.
I grease the bouncer and waitress enough to allow us to be left alone. There is a long couch in a pretty nice, upscale VIP room.. She gets nude, lays down long ways and I straddle her. My pants are off, my shirt is on. We play with each other for a few minutes. While I’m fingering her I notice something odd. Her vagina seems to have a big curve in it about 1 1/2 inches in. It curves upward, towards her belly button. At least that’s how it feels. I don’t finger her for too long, and I’m giving her large natural tits lots o love, so I quickly forget about this slightly strange fingering experience.
A few minutes later and I stick my dick in. Everything is great for the first inch and a half, maybe two, and then I hit a wall. Seriously it feels exactly like I’ve hit a wall and I can go no further. WTF. I pushed harder, longer, but the wall wouldn’t budge. Then I remember that her pussy felt crooked. Maybe it is. I tried several times, but I could not go in any further. I readjusted her body a few times to see if I could get around the corner at a different angle, but nothing I tried would let me in more than a couple of inches.
Some of you are probably thinking what I thought at the time, which is that she used to be a he. But I absolutely guarantee that is not it. I studied her anatomy even more closely when I noticed this. No chance she has ever been a male. I’m positive.
Some of you are also probably thinking that John only has a two inch dick so that’s the problem. Very funny. I’m not large by any means, but I am considerably more than just two fucking inches.
So what do I do? Its kind of awkward in the middle of sex to say “excuse me gorgeous, but by any chance is your vagina crooked because I can’t stick it in all the way.” I can’t bring myself to say anything. So I just fucked her the first two inches. As soon as I hit the wall, I’d pull back and then do a mini thrust back in. She’s cute, I was high, and so I had no problem cuming. In a weird way, this little anomaly in her anatomy was actually a turn on. New and different is hot, and this was extremely different.
But I still want to know WTF happened? I googled “crooked vagina,” and there were some young women who said based upon inserting tampons that they had a crooked vagina. However, it was hard to learn much because a search for “crooked vagina” mostly brought up a wide variety of obscure cultural references. The most logical serious explanation that I found in a limited search is that some part of her internal anatomy was in the way and blocking or limiting full access to her vagina. But I didn’t see anything posted from a doctor.
Has anybody ever heard of such a thing before? For the women out there, is it possible to have a crooked vagina? And should I have done anything different? Should I have mentioned it to her, and if so how does one go about bringing up such a subject?


Forget the first sentence. That was part of an upcoming post. Yes I'm a itty bitty bit high after this club visit.