I goofed up

A good monger, like a good Boy Scout, is always prepared. So we take a condom every time to every club. We bring a couple extra Benjamins cause you never know when you'll be offered an expert blowjob. And we are always always on the look out for stripper sex OTC. I predict that you won't make the same mistake again.

Thanks for the pep talk, JS. The fact is I'm still unsure if I want to make the plunge into full OTC.

Well – like you said – you were sorta not in your element b/c it's not a time you usually go – so you were sorta caught-off-guard/by-surprise - “mistakes” are not always bad b/c we often get to learn from them.

Now you know that that particular time is a good time to perhaps hook up w/ a dancer post-shift – it looks like you wanna spend some time w/ her so nothing is lost by being prepared and asking her the next time the opportunity presents itself – she may say yes and at least you get to hangout w/ a hot chick and maybe (although perhaps unlikely) get some free putang.

I don't think you goofed up. She said she was heading out after coming over and saying high.

Either she was off to c hubby (or BF) or some higher spending customer. Perhaps she was fucked out lol. Or more likely headed to an otc appointment and wanting to preserve some regular who just spent money on dances to drain money from in the future.

I would say she was on way to lucrative otc appointment, her behavior says it all. Have you made her and offer for otc? This is not rocket science. The next time you encounter her have a little chat, don't take more than two dances. Say "I will offer you $200 if you can meet me at xyz notel tomorrow around noon. I will pay for the room. We can just meet for sessions from now on." After about 6 or 7 sessions with you she will tell you how she would rather do that than dance at the club. She might even tell you "your my number one" like one of them told me one time.

Don't beat yourself up too much. We all have had a situation where we think about what we should have said later. Just live and learn for the next time. Thanks for sharing because it also helps us to remember what we should do ifit happens to us.

No you didn't mess up. Messing up is when you go to New Orleans and drop $500 and get nothing in return.

I remember thinking I was going to hook up with a dancer i just met the next day. i was at the beach on vacation. I messed up by telling a dancer I was good at remembering numbers. I remembered her phone number the first two hours at the club every time she asked. I didn't write it down. several hours later when I got back to my room, I got two numbers mixed up. I thought she must not have been serious after all. went back to the club again that night and another dancer told me she waited an hour by the phone. I messed up. I was leaving in the morning.

Over thinking situations like this can often take the fun & spontaneity out of clubbing. Stop second guessing and never dwell on "what could have been". If something was meant to happen it would have availed itself, either conscientiously from you or from her. Let go. There's always mañana.

That opportunity will come again. Look at the flip side, maybe she made some money, was tired as shit and just wanted to go home and was being nice by just stopping to say "hi."

A lot of times after a long week by the time I get into a club on Friday night I'm worn out and not on my "a" game and it's nothing to be ashamed about.

Actually what happened may be a good thing. It would be a good conversation starter next time you see her, open up by "apologizing and then offering to meet her outside the club sometime in the future" if you think that's something you'd like to do down the road.

I think most of us would like to kick ourselves in the ass for not following through. When I was back in my 20's I ran into 2 girls that I knew at my favorite watering hole. One was married and I knew the BF of the other. They were celebrating the single one's birthday. So I bought them a round of drinks. Next thing I knew the married one disappeared. So I wound up having a few more drinks with the single one that turned out to be a nurse at a nearby hospital. She mentioned seeing all of the babies in the nursery and then says to me "doesn't any one do it for fun anymore?" Yeah. I went home. Alone.

James, why the OTC reluctance? It really is awesome with the right girl.

@JamesSD .... here's what I think, you have impeccable instincts, and maybe you were setting up "trust" with her by not asking this once and obvious time like any horn PL might do, because maybe you trust there will be a next time so when you ask it won't seem over zealous.

At least that's what I might have done. I try not to always go for the obvious play. It's a gamble, but high risk high reward. (Because it is sometimes better to just go with the obvious play)

Don't sweat it, you'll see her again. A similar thing happened to me last night. I saw one of the hottest black girls I've seen awhile, there's no way she could have been from Portland (she's from San Diego, moved to Portland a year ago). I had some dances with her, and I knew I wanted to take her OTC, but unfortunately I didn't ask her. Fortunately this club has the dancer schedule posted on their website, so I'll just check when she's working and I'll go see her again.

I wouldn't dwell on it. Consider it just a life experience that you'll learn from. You know the club and the shift change so just put yourself in the same situation again. Next time be prepared with an immediate response. Tell yourself it'll probably be a "No" so it doesn't come as a let down.