I realize I'm mostly preaching to the choir here, but a recent SW thread brings up some of my feelings about being intimidated by strippers, feeling like you have to make up lies and excuses for not wanting to dance with her -- in fact, thinking you owe her any excuse at all other than "no thanks", etc.
Some choice quotes:
-----------------> SW Dancer 1 The only variation of this I've gotten is the "I'm out of cash".
Me in high-pitched dumb blonde voice: "Thats what the ATM is for, silly!" Him: "Oh... I only have a credit card/maxed out my daily withdrawal, sorry" Me: "That's okay, we do cash advances at the bar!"
And then I give them this little "I know what you're doing, dude" look. Coupled with the 'stupid stripper' voice, their resulting expression is hilarious.
I've made $$ off this, usually by just being pushy/intimidating with a wishy-washy customer. But when it fails, I at least succeed in making the customer feel like I've called his BS and 9/10 times, they leave shortly after.
--------------------> SW Dancer 2 Haha I'm right there with Selina. I do a lot of leading to the ATM and wallet checks. "Look you have $30 left! You can do one dance!" smile Be aggressive! Half the time they give in, the other half of the time they just leave from embarrassment. Win-win! -----------------> SW Dancer 3 I normally be sweet for about 10 seconds and then call them out. "I know that's a lie. I'm a stripper I can smell bullshit a mile away. If you don't want a dance from me just be a man and say so."
-----------------> Subraman again
And on and on it goes. I actually agree with Stripper #3. If you don't want a dance just say "no thanks", no reason to make up an excuse, as you can see graphically above you're not "hurting their feelings" by being direct and honest, and not sparing their feelings by making up some bullshit excuse, it just elicits contempt for your spinelessness, and can lead to the kinds of interactions above, if the stripper just feels like messing with you. You don't owe her any excuse, I do NOT answer "Why not?" or any other followup questions from the strippers although if I feel like it I might play with them back, and a 110 pound 20-year-old girl whose life led her to be a stripper should not intimidate you.


I used to cave in.
Now I just play with them back.
Me: "Oh, so there's an ATM machine that will charge me $20 to take out $40? Why didn't I think of using that before you suggested it?"
Or,
'Me: "Cool. There's an ATM here. I'm sure you can withdrawal some money then from YOUR checking or credit card account then, right? Why would I want to use mine here?"
I always put my money in my front pocket also to avoid the "you have money in your wallet, I just saw you pay for your drink" SS line....
And if I don't want a dance, I WILL say so now. Comes with experience with a lot of different personality types in the SC.