Bullshit Excuses from Intimidated Customers

8/7/2015 8:49:15 AM

I realize I'm mostly preaching to the choir here, but a recent SW thread brings up some of my feelings about being intimidated by strippers, feeling like you have to make up lies and excuses for not wanting to dance with her -- in fact, thinking you owe her any excuse at all other than "no thanks", etc.

https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showth…

Some choice quotes:

-----------------> SW Dancer 1
The only variation of this I've gotten is the "I'm out of cash".

Me in high-pitched dumb blonde voice: "Thats what the ATM is for, silly!"
Him: "Oh... I only have a credit card/maxed out my daily withdrawal, sorry"
Me: "That's okay, we do cash advances at the bar!"

And then I give them this little "I know what you're doing, dude" look. Coupled with the 'stupid stripper' voice, their resulting expression is hilarious.

I've made $$ off this, usually by just being pushy/intimidating with a wishy-washy customer.
But when it fails, I at least succeed in making the customer feel like I've called his BS and 9/10 times, they leave shortly after.

--------------------> SW Dancer 2
Haha I'm right there with Selina. I do a lot of leading to the ATM and wallet checks. "Look you have $30 left! You can do one dance!" *smile* Be aggressive! Half the time they give in, the other half of the time they just leave from embarrassment. Win-win!
-----------------> SW Dancer 3
I normally be sweet for about 10 seconds and then call them out. "I know that's a lie. I'm a stripper I can smell bullshit a mile away. If you don't want a dance from me just be a man and say so."

-----------------> Subraman again

And on and on it goes. I actually agree with Stripper #3. If you don't want a dance just say "no thanks", no reason to make up an excuse, as you can see graphically above you're not "hurting their feelings" by being direct and honest, and not sparing their feelings by making up some bullshit excuse, it just elicits contempt for your spinelessness, and can lead to the kinds of interactions above, if the stripper just feels like messing with you. You don't owe her any excuse, I do NOT answer "Why not?" or any other followup questions from the strippers although if I feel like it I might play with them back, and a 110 pound 20-year-old girl whose life led her to be a stripper should not intimidate you.

48 comments

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warhawks

•

9 years ago

I used to cave in.

Now I just play with them back.

Me: "Oh, so there's an ATM machine that will charge me $20 to take out $40? Why didn't I think of using that before you suggested it?"

Or,

'Me: "Cool. There's an ATM here. I'm sure you can withdrawal some money then from YOUR checking or credit card account then, right? Why would I want to use mine here?"

I always put my money in my front pocket also to avoid the "you have money in your wallet, I just saw you pay for your drink" SS line....

And if I don't want a dance, I WILL say so now. Comes with experience with a lot of different personality types in the SC.

saer

•

9 years ago

I usually just say "no thanks". If they push me on it, I get surly.

shadowcat

•

9 years ago

I have no problem saying no. Where I do feel awkward is when I have turned down previous favorites several times because they got fat or got fake tits and then they ask why I don't want dances from them anymore.

Subraman

•

9 years ago

i have to admit it took me some time to get to where I am, but it's increased my enjoyment of the club 1000%. When I first started clubbing, and a young beautiful smiling girl practically chirped her desire to dance for me, well, I certainly didn't want to CRUSH HER HEART and tell her no, so I made up excuses. And if she engaged me like the SW girls did above, I totally sweated it and just wished the interrogation would be over soon.

At some point, I figured out that a polite "no thanks" is the best policy, it doesn't hurt her feelings, I don't owe her any excuse anyway, and it gives her less to grab onto if she wants to go into the weak-customer-interrogation-process. Still, a cunty stripper can turn anything into an insult, so the next thing I adopted was a "I won't answer any questions" policy. If she asked me "why not?", I'd politely but more forcefully no-thank her, or if I felt like playing with her, I'd answer her question with a question of my own, and make her answer MY questions instead... but never lose control of the conversation. If I can't out-verbal-judo a 20-year-old, then I'm done for :) And along the way, I just stopped being intimidated ... I don't even find these interactions unpleasant or stressful in the least anymore, I'm relaxed and confident and handle it graciously.

Didn't happen overnight, but starts with realizing you don't owe her any excuses at all, and refusing to let her verbally bully you -- like Cesar Milan, just get them into a state of calm submission quickly, or let them leave and find weaker customers -- win/win.

chessmaster

•

9 years ago

If its because their not up to my standards, I usually don't mind saying no thanks. If its for another reason(previously shitty dance, previous rob or don't like her attitude) but she looks good, then it gets awkward and my spine goes out if she pushes me.

lopaw

•

9 years ago

Very rarely am I ever pressured, but when I am I am polite but firm and simply walk away with a departing "maybe another time".

pensionking

•

9 years ago

+1 @Lopaw
Yup, that will do it. Message sent and received . . .

chessmaster

•

9 years ago

^ouch.

sclvr5005

•

9 years ago

Agree +1 lopaw.
Classy and effective. I use a similar tactic when necessary.

san_jose_guy

•

9 years ago

I'm always polite, but I just play with them some. I don't go so far as to be wasting their time or leading them on though. But I don't ever give an absolute hard refusal. For one thing I ask them when their next turn on stage is, suggesting that I will sit at their stage. I often do too.

But I like to pick the girl, so I orchestrate the situation. The more aggressive the girls are the better, but I still orchestrate it so I am clearly making the selection myself.

SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/

Clackport

•

9 years ago

I'll admit that sometimes I don't have the balls to say no, I'll say like maybe later when I know I won't get dances. My phrase I've been using now when I have to reject dancers is, "I'm not a lapdance kind of guy".

Papi_Chulo

•

9 years ago

I usually go w/ "I'm good right now" or when I feel more whimpy I'll go w/ "Not right now I just had a few" (which is often true).

chandler

•

9 years ago

Actually, the most common approach I get these days isn't "wanna dance?" It's "Are you waiting for someone?" Not very intimidating, and pretty easy to respond to, because I invariably do have someone else in mind.

alldaylong

•

9 years ago

My goto phrases: "Thanks for stopping by" preceded by "No thanks but" for the wanna dance types or "Thanks for stopping by" followed with "but I don't wanna waste any more of your time" for the plompers.

Lone_Wolf

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9 years ago

Oh man, I wish it was as black/white as saying "no thanks" for dance offers.

Being a regular at a club, the challenge is saying "yes, I know you gave me a decent bbbj in VIP two weeks ago but I don't want a dance from you today"

sharkhunter

•

9 years ago

I don't usually get to have fun making up lies about why I don't want a dance yet but do have fun making up stories and see if the dancers fall for it.
One time I kept telling all the dancers I just got there. It worked for about 2 hours until one dancer told me I said that 2 hours ago. lol. Then I just told her maybe later.
Sometimes I don't mind them coming back.

Most of the time where I club now, dancers ask if I'm interested in company at my table so I either get rid of them right away or decide to talk to her for a few minutes.

sharkhunter

•

9 years ago

It's only in the wanna dance clubs where you can have fun making up stories. Apparently I am too good of a liar because dancers usually believe whatever I tell them or just leave if I say an excuse. Example, I tell a dancer I'm all out of money. She walks away but is still watching. I go tip one dancer on one stage, then another at another stage. She comes back and said I thought you said you were all out of money. I said not for stage tips with a smile on my face. That was a few years ago. Now I just get rid of the girl fast if I'm not interested.

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Lone_Wolf---->"Being a regular at a club, the challenge is saying "yes, I know you gave me a decent bbbj in VIP two weeks ago but I don't want a dance from you today"

I get that. "No thanks" is reserved for women I don't know. If a stripper has seriously done right by me -- taking my uncovered cock in her mouth would certainly qualify as "done right" -- it's completely different. I'm not going to "no thanks" her. But a stripper with whom you've sessioned is not going to pull the humiliate-the-customer routine as described above anyway, at least IME.

JamesSD

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9 years ago

I've definitely gotten more blunt in my rejections, and I think most dancers appreciate it. I do get frustrated when I tell them to come back later and they dont.

martinb244

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9 years ago

If I am siting down and a dancer jumps into my lap unsolicited, I will push them out of my lap and say, "No, thank you." How is that for blunt rejection?

sharkhunter

•

9 years ago

Strip clubs are great places to try out your bs stories. I usually only tell the truth though. That's what makes my stories so good. I just leave out the part where I was dreaming.

Estafador

•

9 years ago

I used to use bullshit excuses like I'm out of money. But that sort of story got around quick and I didn't get a girl for an hour. So now I just say, "I'm not interested in YOU" and they always wonder why and swear up and down they are better than my prefernece. Still at the end of the day they understand I'm not their sort of customer. I've been tempted to stop them right at hello but I feel that would be too rude. Do you think that's too rude?

GACA

•

9 years ago

Hmm, so how many of you worried about being rude actually step up to civii's. Girls are fckn rude when they want to be too. Real fckn rude. Maybe that's why I'm straight to the point when it comes to SC. I'm like you girls get hit on all day long, you get exhausted of it, so you understand how we feel in this opposite world where you ladies are always hitting us up for dances.

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Estafador: For me personally, stopping them at hello is rude, you have to decide for yourself if it's you or not. I don't think the only options are, "Make up some bullshit excuse because you're scared" and "be rude to her", I'm fine smiling and saying hello, then telling them no thanks ... besides, some girls I'm not interested in end up becoming great drinking buddies or wingmen (wingstrippers?), at least in slow-hustle clubs.

chandler

•

9 years ago

Yeah, stopping them at hello is rude, but when her next question is how're you doing, I'll reply that I'm fine thanks, but I do have some one else joining me. I want to at least make sure that she knows I'm not interested before she has a chance to sit down.

BTW, that Stripperweb thread is great. Notice how it drifted from hustling "bullshit excuse" guys to just harassing any guys (The Rule of 3) who won't say yes to a dance? And trying to get guys who turn them down to leave the club? lol

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Yeah... and to the extent that I believe them, I do think a lot of guys do exactly what they say, wilt under the pressure and leave the club. And can you imagine the guy who let a stripper take a credit card out of his wallet and hand it to someone else?! I kinda believe those stories, I think many customers feel intimidated and awkward about telling strippers no, making the mistake of treating strippers like regular civilian women instead of predatory salesmen (salesstrippers).

Lancer1411

•

9 years ago

I never like to turn a girl down outright. My go to is, "Not right now, thanks." That way I politely decline while leaving it open as an option for later.

chandler

•

9 years ago

I almost always DON'T want her to think there's an option try again later.

GACA

•

9 years ago

Gotta admit, I didn't like saying "No" a few months ago. I still don't like it. But I've feel like it's not even the end of world for them. I've told girls "no" and then have tracked them down later and asked for a dance. So.

chandler

•

9 years ago

I've done that, too, GACA. I don't think it makes any difference to them whether you initially tell them "not right now" or "maybe later" or just "no thanks". To a stripper looking to sell a dance right now, they all mean the same thing.

shadowcat

•

9 years ago

chandler - Surprised you weren't in the club today. Your favorite was.

Papi_Chulo

•

9 years ago

“... I think many customers feel intimidated and awkward about telling strippers no, making the mistake of treating strippers like regular civilian women instead of predatory salesmen (salesstrippers) ...”

That should be in the “SCing 101” handbook for newbie and/or inexperienced PLs.

GACA

•

9 years ago

^^^ true story papi. I like that SW has the sticky discussion so that all newbies can just look for the basics. We need something like that here...

1) strippers are worse than used car salesman or ARM home loan brokers. Expect the to want a lot for very little. It's nothing personal, they ate looking for suckers it's their fucking job.

2) Never ever get tricked into thinking Rule #1 doesn't apply to you

3) If for any reason you befriend a stripper, go back a memorize rule #1

4) it's your money spend it how you want...

Estafador

•

9 years ago

I don't want scrawny bitches to come back. My words are literal. If i don't say come back later, don't come back. But these girls also have to make money so i can understand their attempts at persuasion.

Estafador

•

9 years ago

Of course im a losing battle for them

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Lancer---> " I never like to turn a girl down outright. My go to is, "Not right now, thanks." That way I politely decline while leaving it open as an option for later. "

Lancer, maybe you can be our test case! Why don't you like turning down a girl outright? I can understand leaving the door open with girls you're not sure about yet (although "not right now" seems to be universally despised/disrespected by the strippers, so I'd go with almost anything else, but I do understand keeping the door open), but I"m certain there are at least some girls you know right away you won't ever want dances with. Is it that you're just uncomfortable saying no, for some reason? What will happen to you if you say "no thanks" instead, other than not wasting some strippers time when/if they come back to you again?

I don't think "not right now" is a bullshit excuse the way "I'm out of money" is, but I think still does indicate a bit of fear of the strippers

twentyfive

•

9 years ago

I don't usually start out nasty I usually say not now, or no thank you, because I like to be the the one to pick who I want a dance from. Every once in a while a stepper becomes a pain in the ass and when that happens, I get testy with them. A case in point one little smart mouth told me I didn't know what I was missing which I completely ignored , she than asked me if I like girls suggesting a different bar which is well known to be frequented by folks with alternative lifestyles and I got pissed off enough to tell her to get the fuck away from me , because I am of the opinion that argueing with an idiot make you an idiot too. This moron goes over to tell her manager that I threatened her. A few minutes later her manager comes over to me (I had met him at another club where he was a floor man ) and tells me that not only did the bartender overhear the exchange but he personally apologized to me, bought me a drink and told me that he had fired the dancer on the spot for such stupid behavior. I thought about this for about 5 minutes and requested him to not fire the girl after all she was stupid but the attitude was probably from her talking to her coworkers and suggested that he just reprimand her. Anyway to make a long story short that is just what he did and the story got around a little bit in that club and I can tell you truthfully that the girls in there are generally nicer to me than usual and subsequent visits have gotten me a free drink from that stripper and a few others. The takeaway from this is it generally pays to be a nice guy and that you don't need to take crap from anyone .

shadowcat

•

9 years ago

25 - That reminded me of my trip to TJ back in '61(see article). These fat old whores would come around and grab you dick and ask "fucky fucky" and when you said no they would ask if you were queer. :)

Estafador

•

9 years ago

@SC should have just said that your not queer, but their just fat.

twentyfive

•

9 years ago

That's funny

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Unintentionally, I've twice responded to those outrageous stripper responses by bursting out laughing, and in both cases it worked perfectly -- got the stripper pissed and stomping off.

In the first case, my buddy and I were sitting in the club, this stripper who was known to be ornery asks us if we want a dance, we each say "no thanks", and she asks if we're from the Castro (known as a "gay neighborhood"). The two of us looked at each other, burst out laughing, stripper scowled and stomped off.

In the second case, a stripper asked me if I wanted a dance, and I (against my current rule of never owing the stripper any excuse, beyond "no thanks") replied that I was waiting for someone, she asked who I was waiting for, I replied (again, against my current rule of never answering any questions after I decline) with the name of the stripper I was waiting for (Maria). Well, Maria was brand new to the club, and this grizzled veteran stripper hadn't met her yet, so she replies "There's no Maria here. You're a fucking liar." !!!! It was so over the top that I just starting laughing out loud, pretty hard; she got a furious look on her face and walked off, she NEVER looked my way again.

Anyway, in both of those cases, the laughter wasn't forced, the girls' responses were just so over-the-top that I truly thought it was hysterical. And in a way, although I had every right to get pissed, I think laughing works WAY better -- the girls obviously wanted to upset me with their replies, and instead of ruining my night, they just ended up getting infuriated. I think being relaxed rather than intimidated around strippers really helps you come up with better ways to respond to their rudeness -- even the over-the-top ones rarely get me irritated anymore, I can usually own them and send them stomping off, in most cases

ilbbaicnl

•

9 years ago

It's easy when it's some dancer that, in your book, doesn't justify betraying the loyalty of Rosie Palm. It's just a matter, when you run out of anything else, of saying (with a polite smile all the while) "sorry you're just not my type", "I can't explain exactly what my type is", "how many time do you want me to repeat, I can't explain it".

The tricky part is when she's OK, but you're still hoping someone else will come along that you find more attractive. I've never figured out a politic way of dealing with that case. If you say maybe later, they generally will never offer you a dance again as long as they remember you, or drama out in some fashion if you spend all your money on other dancers you are more interested in.

JohnSmith69

•

9 years ago

Learning to say no to young women who want to take off their clothes for you is absolutely essential to mastering syrup clubs. Like most everybody else, it pathetically took me several years to learn this completely.

Papi_Chulo

•

9 years ago

“... Learning to say no to young women who want to take off their clothes for you is absolutely essential to mastering syrup clubs ...”

I didn't know strip clubs went by the slang term “syrup clubs” - learn something new everyday :)

TheFword

•

9 years ago

I have never been asked if I liked girls, if I were queer etc. Now after reading this I have an answer ready if the need arises. "Are you gay?" " No, but if all girls were like you I might consider it"

chandler

•

9 years ago

Wow, the "are you gay" hustle has to be the most pathetic one I've ever heard of. It boils down to: "You don't want a dance from me, even though I am female, therefore you must not like girls."

Ooh, so intimidating.

lopaw

•

9 years ago

Hmmmm. I get the "are you gay" thing all the time. Seems to work well in my favor ;)

Subraman

•

9 years ago

Lol You keep rocking it lopaw!

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