A dustman is going along a street picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his dustcart lorry. He gets to one house where the bin hasn't been left out so he has a quick look for it, goes round the back but still can't see it so he knocks on the door. There's no answer so he knocks again.
Eventually a Japanese bloke answers..."Harro", says the chappy. "Alright mate, where's ya bin?" asks the dustman.
"I bin on toilet" replies the Japanese bloke, looking perplexed.
Realising the Japanese fellow has misunderstood, the binman smiles and says "No mate, where's ya dust bin?"
"I dust bin on toilet I told you" says the Japanese man.
"Mate" says the dustman... "you're misunderstanding me....Where's your wheelie bin?"
"OK, OK", says the Japanese bloke, "I wheelie bin having a wank!"
A penguin is on holiday, driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first garage, asking the mechanic to take a look at the car for him. He tells the mechanic he's a bit peckish and the mechanic suggests the diner around the corner and that he should come back in an hour as that's when he closes shop.
The penguin goes into the diner and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big bowl of vanilla ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands, he makes a real mess trying to eat with his little flippers.
After finishing his ice cream, he realises almost an hour has gone and rushes back to the garage and asks the mechanic if he’s found the problem. The mechanic looks up at the penguin and says, “It looks like you've blown a seal.”
“No, no,” the penguin replies, “it’s just ice cream.“