Approaching Couples

22 comments

• Diva1975

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  9 years ago

  It can be intimidating on several levels. First of all you're approaching two people not one and one of those people is a female and I think females dread to be rejected by other females more than males. Simple as that John!
• lopaw

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  9 years ago

  What Diva said. Also a dancer never knows what kind of drama she might be walking into.....does the female of the couple really want to be there? Will she get all jealous or threatened? It also takes alot more work to deal with a couple. Many dancers can't be bothered with the uncertainty and likely low payoff, since apparently couples aren't known to be big spenders. That's what I've been told by dancers, though I think that's BS. We need seaboadrr to chime in here.
• seaboardrr

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  9 years ago

  We get ignored every time we go. I think I've bitched a good bit about it here. As we've been told by a few strippers they mostly are worried the woman won't be receptive to them approaching. The assumption is the woman may just simply go off and either verbally or physically attack them so it isn't worth the risk. Even when we're at the stage tipping and my wife is eagerly playing with titties they still don't know if she's just playing around or if she's open to anything more beyond that. On our next visit we will both be a lot more aggressive and flat out ask everyone we like to sit and talk and ask for LD's. From what we've gathered once we do that and all the dancers know we're approachable things should be a lot easier. So, the only real answer is that for the majority of strippers you will have to become known as fun regulars that can be approached without any worries of the woman having issues.
• seaboardrr

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  9 years ago

  I agree with lopaw on the spending excuse. We could go to the mountains on vacation for a 5 day long weekend and get a nice cabin for what we spend in a club over the course of 8 or 9 hours in one night. We have seen a couple other couples who are both obviously enjoying being there and we've watched them go back and easily get half a dozen or more LD's. The money argument just does't hold water IMO since a stripper has to hustle a single male and the majority we see go back for a dance or 2 and then sit at a table around the edge sipping a beer most of the night so I think spending is close to equal in reality if you average it out. If both parties in a couple WANT to be there then they'll spend (even though it costs us double.....insert irritated smiley face here). Spotting the couples where the woman is OBVIOUSLY not there for her own pleasure is pretty easy. We feel if we're able to point them out then the strippers should be able to also. But, maybe they drank the kool-aid at some point listening to war stories in the DR and really believe all women are against them. Who really knows. Just like OTC some aren't bi or bi-curious at all and don't even want to do the whole P4P bi gig with a couple. Just make it known you're BOTH there for fun and make sure they know you exist and remember you. Like I've said before, when we go back for dances with a new dancer one of the first thing mrs sea asks is "what are her boundaries?" This has ALWAYS made the stripper then ask her what our boundaries are to which she replies there are none. Every single one has gotten the biggest smile on their face when they heard that and it's been fun. Be seen and promote yourself and the word should get around the DR and y'all will get some action. Damn, I can't wait for next weekend now. We're pulling out all the stops.
• Subraman

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  9 years ago

  A whole bunch of strippers have told me that couples are their least favorite to approach, and some flat won't do it. I've personally twice seen the female of the couple cause drama in the club, which is exactly who the strippers say is the reason for their hesitation. That said, I regularly take strippers to the strip clubs, and usually get great treatment. My last stripper I did this with just loved going to the club, it showed on her face, and I think the other strippers could see it. Then, once a stripper approached who my girl liked, she just made it obvious and they hit it off. Plus it probably didn't hurt that my stripper would cop to being a stripper right away, and it was like they were compadres
• Diva1975

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  9 years ago

  The last time I took a couple back I almost felt guilty telling them they would be charged double then they handed me 4 of those pretty new hundreds and it was on! Brilliant move on their part;) ok time to go to bed goodnight TUSCL friends
• DandyDan

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  9 years ago

  Apart from the potential drama with the woman in the couple, I think there may also be an unspoken expectation the man in the couple is supposed to go out and approach the dancer. It's also quite possible some of the dancers do not like entertaining the ladies. One of my faves says she never approaches couples because she isn't a lesbian, at least in her private life. It's probably similar to how some dancers don't approach black customers.
• JohnSmith69

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  9 years ago

  Interesting dynamics. I hadn't expected it since the DS regularly approaches couples and while they are not her favorite, their money is as good as everyone else's. I guess when you've got females judging other females based upon their physical appearance, some drama is inevitable. Next time I'll be prepared from the outset for my role as hunter gatherer.
• sharkhunter

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  9 years ago

  I think a club or dancer is being unfair to charge a couple double. I would understand charging double if two dancers were dancing but one dancer should only charge her normal or the clubs normal price in my opinion per dance. I guess that would discourage me from visiting as a couple. I guess every club has their own rules. I like it when dancers can set their own prices and charge what I think is fair. I've had dancers double team me and they agreed to only get paid for dances one at a time, that is I paid one dancer for two dances and then I paid the other dancer for two and she danced after the other was finished. Both girls just waited around while the other was dancing and did not charge me while they were waiting. I've also done it the usual way where both dancers dance at the same time, it's understandable to charge double for that.
• sharkhunter

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  9 years ago

  Some clubs have different rules and some charge apparently per customer per song in certain rooms. Some clubs let the dancers charge how they deem fair. independent contractors.
• georgmicrodong

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  9 years ago

  My ATF used to love it when couples came in. According to her, the best way to approach a couple is to not approach them as a couple, but to focus 99% on the woman. She also agreed with seaboardrr's comments about it being easy to spot the ones who didn't really want to be there. But that didn't stop her from using the same strategy. According to her, it worked more often than not. Of course, she's at least as big a pussy hound as most who post here, and absolutely *loves* "stealing the fem cherry." Her words, not mine. :)
• tumblingdice

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  9 years ago

  Went last night with a friend.She was uptight,strippers were not.
• JohnSmith69

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  9 years ago

  Our dancers also seemed unsure who they should sit next to and focus on in our discussions. Most sat next to me, probably because I went and solicited them. And maybe also because I was paying. But a couple sat with the DS and focused on her from the outset. They all seemed happy to focus dances on her when I told then that is what I wanted them to do. I guess the dynamics are unclear to a dancer until she can get an understanding of what a couple wants.
• sclvr5005

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  9 years ago

  I think the dancer is smart to approach the woman and focus on her. I can just imagine a dancer approaching a couple and hanging all over the guy. Meow!
• lookingforpink

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  9 years ago

  The wife and I have enjoyed many trips to strip clubs. Las Vegas, Dallas, Miami, Houston. New Orleans. I would say that of all the times, there have been only once where we where not given much attention to. I believe it was because the wife was not feeling well and was not interested in going at all that night. The girls picked up on it. As it was said earlier, the girls that make the contact with the lady, knows how to work her, get all the money.
• tumblingdice

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  9 years ago

  Throw me down the keys.
• JamesSD

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  9 years ago

  I'm not sure when the female half of the couple is making eye contact and smiling. Now, the last time I was at the club there was one couple where the woman had her arms crossed and looked bored the whole time. Not sure if she lost a bet it it was his birthday, but I can't blame dancers for not approaching.
• seaboardrr

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  9 years ago

  We look at it this way. The general view in our opinion has always been that most women who go to a SC with their BF or SO are doing so simply to appease him. If the man is the one talking to the dancer or the one making contact asking for dances then it may seem that the woman isn't into it. In reality this could simply mean she feels intimidated by naked women she feels look better than her but really would like some interaction. Men judge other men (that guy has bigger muscles or better abs,etc...) but most won't admit it. I'm as straight as straight can be but I have absolutely no problem looking at another guy and telling mrs sea if he's hot or sexy. When I see some guy I'm thinking damn, his abs look better than mine or his biceps look awesome and i'm thinking about what I can do to work on myself so I'm even sexier for her. What can I do to get better muscle definition or tone up a specific part, etc... Now women on the other hand are a whole different universe. Most women will look at another woman and think she's hot but in the same second they're thinking how much they hate her because she looks better. It's the damnedest thing. It's all about jealousy. When mrs sea looks at a guy who is obviously more fit than I am I ask if she'd like my body more like that and that's my goal. i don't get jealous. On the opposite end of the spectrum, the other night some tits came on some movie and I said "damn, she has some nice tits". Mrs sea of course gave me the "glare" and I simply said i knew she agreed with me. She said of course she agreed and they were amazing tits but I couldn't actually say they were amazing until SHE said they were amazing. Then and only then was I allowed to comment on the amaziness of the titties thereby agreeing with her...lol. Seiously? Oh well, fact of life. Let me get back on point. For a dancer to know that the woman is there because she wants to be there and is in fact there to enjoy playing with strippers then the female portion of the couple should be the aggressor. As much as I would simply grab dancer after dancer for us to get LD's from and mrs sea would happily allow me to do this how is the dancer to know mrs sea REALLY wants this? How is she to feel comfortable enough or know that the female part of the couple is really agreeable to this if the male is the one taking the lead? The female simply HAS to be the one making contact so the dancers know she is in fact there to have fun and really wants the interaction for them both. This may take some time but the more we go the more open and aggressive she has become in getting us attention. The more we go the more we learn on what to do. It's baby steps just like with anything in life but this is one area where the male has to usually relinquish the control we've always been taught to take. Having a stripper sit and chat can be a logistical problem. SC's just usually aren't setup for couples. Straight booths or couches or deep cushy chairs which leave distance between people. Should the dancer sit next to the female, the male, in the middle? Sometimes our ATF will sit in mrs sea's lap. Sometimes she'll sit between us. Sometimes mrs sea is on my lap and our ATF is leaning against my side talking to mrs sea. The point being is the female and the dancer need to be having the conversation. I get called the "stunt dick" all the time. I'm fine with that. I'm basically arm candy. No matter how secure the female part of the couple is with the relationship her and the dancer need to be the one's having the convo just so she always knows it's about all 3 of you. No matter how secure you are there is always a tipping point to jealousy. It's human nature. When the female and the stripper both know there is no jealousy to worry about that's when everyone can have fun and the man can finally open his mouth and say something...lol
• shadowcat

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  9 years ago

  Next time take some cocaine with you. It attracts dancers like flies on shit. There used to be a couple that came into Follies every Saturday afternoon and had 2-6 dancers sitting with them at all times. Used to piss me off because they had some of the hottest women in the club. They became known as the "cocaine couple".
• chandler

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  9 years ago

  Never had a problem anytime I've gone with strippers. If anything, we'd get swarmed over too much. We never tried to pass ourselves off as a couple, obviously just a hot ass young chick and her sponsor. I usually let her take the lead in snagging girls.
• JohnSmith69

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  9 years ago

  seab, good suggestions. Unfortunately my DS was uncharacteristically shy and quiet at the clubs. Maybe just nervous cause it was her first time as a customer. scat, she had coke with her but I don't think she'd be willing to share. Also might've gotten us kicked out. We weren't at follies you know. Chandler, my experience was the opposite. I guess I need to get you to teach me how to be a strip club stud. :)
• Subraman

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  9 years ago

  "Never had a problem anytime I've gone with strippers. If anything, we'd get swarmed over too much. We never tried to pass ourselves off as a couple, obviously just a hot ass young chick and her sponsor. I usually let her take the lead in snagging girls. " +100 :) I wonder if there's a vibe being put out, that some of you don't realize is going on, because I could have written exactly the same thing. The experience some of you are having is the opposite of what I've experienced, and I can say definitively there's no strip club stud'ing going on in my case :)