Mishaps on the way to and from strip clubs.
chandler
Blue Ridge Foothills
The other night I got a speeding ticket in Ohio. I've had others, but my last traffic ticket was for an illegal U-turn leaving a club in what I thought was part of a parking lot. My worst luck has been hitting deer. Michigan perennially leads the nation in car-deer collisions, and I do my part in putting us at the top. I've hit four deer, including one in the middle of the road that was already dead. Always after midnight, and all but one on my way home from a club. Thankfully, it's always been within an hour of home. I would hate to have to deal with a wrecker, etc. while driving back from Illinois or someplace.
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18 comments
I was propositioned by a hooker in the parking lot at the old Baby Dolls in Dallas once - good thing I was out of $$ - I think it might have been a sting operation.
I have heard about someone carrying a shotgun or rifle around with them and shooting deer they see along the road but I haven't seen anyone do that.
I once saw a small deer run out across a divided highway from the very tall grass in the medium and it startled me. I quickly remembering someone saying if you see one, there is often another. I hit my brakes and stopped dead in the road. Another one ran along the same path as the first and I would have collided if I hadn't anticipated it. I turned on my bright lights and looked around. I suddenly saw a third looking nervously at me like it wanted to cross the road but was wondering what I was going to do. It decided to stay and I took off.
Most of the other deer I watch them alongside the road and if they stay still, I just keep on going. It's the ones you don't see that make you nervous if they are moving. I keep hoping I stay like Riddick in one of his latest movies where he says "it's an animal thing" and either they sense me or I sense them and we don't collide. knocking on wood again.
I once got a flat tire and that was annoying especially since I had to use a flashlight and didn't know who might stop. Apparently no one is interested in stopping during the night or you hope no one threatening. In one place not far from where I once lived in NC, you didn't want to stop there at night. It's the same general area that Michael Jordan's father got killed and he was just taking a nap alongside the road. Someone told me that area had a higher murder rate per capita than New York City.
Oh, I just remembered mishap I had. I ran into a cat on it's 9th life. It was like a big speed bump at 55 mph. One second it was standing beside the road, the next it decided to jump in front of me like a suicidal cat and I was just hoping it didn't damage my car. I didn't think cats were that stupid before that.
As anyone who has hit a deer will tell you, there is no chance to stop or avoid them. I watch for them like a hawk ever since hitting my first deer. I often see them off the side of the road and slow down. However, when they have your number, there's nothing you can do. Just be thankful for your good fortune to date.
I was elected to drive the rental car as I drank the least but the trooper had the passenger (who was much drunker than me) drive and let us go back to the hotel.
Getting involved in some accident in or near a strip club is one of my big fears. I would hate to have a heart attack in a club and have to wake up in Indiana University Hospital to see my wife standing at the bedside...busted!!
By the way, I tried a deer/car case about ten years ago. My client hit a deer and her car spun into the oncoming lane, into the path of another driver.
Not guilty (actually, since it was a civil case, no liability). Pity the deer was not insured. (Actually, if the deer in fact had had an identified owner, the owner could have been sued under the Animals Running at Large Act, which was Lincoln's gift to jurisprudence when he was corporate counsel to the Illinois Central Railroad. The Act changes the old common law presumption--that someone who hits an animal is presumed negligent--to the opposite--that someone whose animal is involved in a collision is presumed to be negligent for letting his animal get out from an enclosure.)