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just a thought

Joker420

I want to preface this by saying that these are my PERSONAL rules that I have established to govern my own behavior and situations. I do not advocate that they are universally applicable, but I have seen that some of them do seem to apply to others in select situations. Hell, the wingman ignores probably at least half of them. But they work for me, so hey, they are what I go with. Some of them require some clarification, so I offer that as well…

GenWar's Rules of Clubbing

1. Whatever money goes IN to the strip club STAYS in the strip club. (This is not to say that you can't leave with money in your pocket. The message of this rule is, do NOT take money into the club if you can't afford to spend it. This includes credit cards or any form of currency. You never know when you hit the door if you will meet that magical dancer who quite simply divests you of every penny you have. Better to not have it if you can't live without it.)

2. Never forget it is a fantasy. Be a PL if you must, but never forget…(This is my balance on the white knight/PL thing. Rule #2 Violations are very painful. If I ever break this one, I write it on notebook paper 1000 times. I need the reinforcement.)

3. Dancer's are there to make money. It motivates EVERYTHING they say and do. (Kind of a build on Rule #2, this rule reminds me that, no, she really doesn't like me like that.)

4. No promises, No jealousy. (How often does this come up?This is a two way street. I neither promise nor get jealous. Neither do I bank on dancer promises nor accept dancer jealousy. Neither of these perfectly reasonable concepts belong in a club.)

5. One known compatible dancer is worth 10 gorgeous potentials. (I am all about the compatibility. The wingman often wonders why I stay with the same girl all night when he has a veritable parade of more lovely women. Rule #5 is why.)

6. Take EVERYTHING you hear with a grain of salt. (What is about strip clubs that make lies socially acceptable?I have been lied to about everything from the location of the bathroom to the amount of the cover. This is before I even get to the dancers. If you meet me in a club and you tell me something and you hear me mumble something about “six,” I probably don't believe you J.)

7. Tips are the oil of the strip club. Apply liberally, yet intelligently. (Everyone knows this right?Everyone follows it right?Wrong. Many many customers don't get this and many more choose to not participate. It never ceases to amaze me how much you get in the way of concessions for a simple $10 tip.)

8. Don't be an idiot. Respect the dancers, the rules and yourself. (Every dancer knows where her line is. If it is past her bouncer's, she knows how to get around that. I don't believe there is a scenario in which any customer should cross that line. If it isn't working, there are more dancers with different lines. But there is no need to be an idiot.)

9. Dancers are for the night. Wingmen (Friends/Partners/Boys) are forever. (She doesn't REALLY like you, just your money. After tonight, you will most likely never see her again. Meanwhile, your wingman is the DD and it is a long, cold walk back to the hotel. How can you mess up these priorities?)

10. It is your money & your lap. If you are happy, nothing else is as relevant. (Actually adapted from something mr_punk once said long ago. Everyone is different, it takes all kinds. This is the only universal measuring stick. It is the only constant. It is also my way of saying, “Look out for #1; the dancer will look out for herself.”)

11. Never conduct financial transactions in front of a dancer. It is like butchering a cow in front of hungry lions. (The wingman has infinite disposable income. Sometimes there is a dancer experience that exceeds the available war-chest. Keeping #1 in mind, it is possible to work out an arrangement to solve that problem. However, don't do it IN FRONT of the dancer. If you have to ask why, just trust me. I learned the hard way.)

12. You never, ever “Wanna dance?”, no matter how badly you actually do. (This is actually a very personal rule. Many customers, I believe, like to walk in, find a nice girl, get a couple dances and walk out. That is not the experience I seek. I am a connoisseur of high-quality SS. I want to be sold. If all you have is those two words, then we are not meant to have a dancer-customer relationship. Not with me. Just not my personal cup of tea.)

13. Unless you are spending money, you are a worthless parasite. (Not that you exist to hemorrhage cash into her waiting hands but if you have no money and don't plan on spending any money, why go?Just makes no sense to me.)

14. Sharing is caring. (There is one club where the wingman and I share an ATF. She is…phenomenal. However, it would be very easy for one of us to monopolize her and cut the other off. Rule #14 is a reminder to myself not to do that. It is kinda like #9 but different. Do the right thing and share the wealth. Sometimes, there really ISN'T enough to go around.)

15. It isn't a sale until she asks for the business. (Another very personal rule. I don't ask for dances. Never do. I do believe in obligations and paying them. If a dancer can't ask for a dance but we have good compatibility, I will buy her drinks, tip her for her time, marvel with her at how she never seems to make any money and basically hang out with her as much as her comfort and Rule #10 allow. But if she doesn't ask for a dance, it will never happen. This is the last rule because I recognize that it is probably more a personal idiosyncraticy as opposed to an applicable principle, but it is my opinion.)

Well, that's about it. And again, in my own defense, I'll remind you….you (well, R/H) asked.