Still on the DL

looneylarry
I did some yard work a few days back and developed a nasty case of poison ivy on my hands, forearms, legs. . .and, yes, crotch. I thought that I had washed my hands frequently, but I forgot to wash my forearms. I also think that I had scratched my package through my clothes a few times, but it must have been enough to affect it. Then, the more you scratch and rub, the more it itches. A grinding lapper would have turned me into hamburger. So I try to think of other things. And no boobies. They ought to refine that shit and use it as a military weapon.

20 comments

Latest

shadowcat
13 years ago
More likely excessive jacking off caused the blisters on your hands. :)
looneylarry
13 years ago
Believe me, no jacking off at all. Feels like somebody gave me a condom lined with napalm.
m00tpoint
13 years ago
Try some Aveeno bath. It will help the itching and soothe the irritated skin. That is what the recommend for chicken pox and when kids get poison ivy or oak.

mrs m00tpoint
thesamurai
13 years ago
Drink lots of alcohol, you won't feel nuthin!!
shadowcat
13 years ago
Buy a goat!
vincemichaels
13 years ago
Ouch !!
Doc_Holliday
13 years ago
Try lemon juice.
Alucard
13 years ago
Go see your Dr.
fetish_dancer
13 years ago
Oatmeal bath with cocoa butter afterwards. You'll smell delicious and the oatmeal soothes the irritation.
LeeH
13 years ago
TMFingI
Ironcat
13 years ago
Had a bad case of poison oak and only soaking in epsom salt baths and calamine lotion made it better. The worse part was that I ran into the roommate of an ex-girl friend who I always wanted to boink and she was drunk on Ouzo. She was all over me but my dick looked like raw meat so I had to pass. Never got the opportunity again - oh well......
steve229
13 years ago
When I was golfing (badly), got case of poison ivy a couple times from searching for my ball in the rough. That helped convince me to quit golf, and put the money towards visiting strip clubs instead. So far, no more poison ivy.
runrdude
13 years ago
Ivydry from CVS has worked for me, but never in such a tender area.
lopaw
13 years ago
I got itchy just reading your post, LL.
runrdude
13 years ago
Need a hand scratching LP?
SammyGold
13 years ago
Get in the shower with the water as hot as you can stand it and aim it right on the rash for as long as you can stand. I swear it felt better than sex in a masochistic kind of way. Even after the poison ivy was gone, the feel of superhot water on the same spot gave me chills for months
looneylarry
13 years ago
Good advice, all. Except Sammy's. The prescription steroids are slowly knocking it out, but the 'roid rage is too much. (Just kidding.) This must be what it is like when you are 85 and sitting around and reminiscing about the asses you tapped years ago. I'm already scheduled to go over to fetish_dancer's place for an oatmeal bath and then she's going to apply the cocoa butter. :)
fetish_dancer
13 years ago
Damn straight.
looneylarry
13 years ago
"You'll smell delicious. . ." [Swoon.]
lopaw
13 years ago
lol runrdude
that depends....how do you look in a g-string? ;)
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