tuscl

The Strip Club Price/Pleasure Index

Monday, May 30, 2011 6:42 PM
Someone on this board a few months ago came up with the idea of the Lap Dance Unit, a way of measuring some of our common daily expenditures in terms of lap dances that could be purchased for the same amount of money. I have thought of something else that I call the Strip Club Price/Pleasure Index, sort of like the Consumer Price Index or the Dow Jones 30 Index. It will be just a number calculated using rigid rules to arrive at a number giving a value to the lap dances we enjoy in the clubs we visit. This index will just take into account lap dances and not the UHM extras that may be available: HJ, BJ, FS, etc. Here is how I would calculate this index. The price part is dead simple: just the price paid for the lap dance; $10, $20, $50, whatever. The pleasure part would be values assigned by the following rating system: Air dance - 1 Dancer contact with customer - 2 Dancer contact + grinding - 3 2-way contact - 4 2-way contact + grinding - 5 2-way contact with all the goodies (boobies and pussy) - 6 2-way contact with the goodies + grinding - 7 All of the above + in-the-pants happy ending - 8 Calculation of the index is easy. $10 air dance has an index value of 10: 10 divided by 1. $25 dance including 2-way contact with the goodies + grinding has an index value of 3.57: 25 divided by 7. The lower the index number the better the monetary value of the dance. In my opinion this number gives a fairly objective rating to the quality and value of the lap dance. Dancer attractiveness will always be totally subjective and a dancer's lap dance index can vary from customer to customer. How do you tell that I spent a mind-numbing 14 hours on the drill site today? Any comments on this latest bit of twaddle from my elderly brain?

15 comments

  • mmdv26
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    13 years ago
    iphone app to guide us through the computation would be handy.
  • samsung1
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    13 years ago
    interesting idea. There are some types of clubs where management is strict on no customer touching but they seem to tolerate dancers giving HJs and BJ through the shorts. Much more pleasurable than grinding.
  • gillydon
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    13 years ago
    Your index looks like it would work for people who are just looking for maximum mileage for minimum cost, assuming that they don't care about dancer looks, dancer attitude, the club cleanliness and facilities, or any of the other non-mileage factors that impact the experience.
  • tttclub
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    13 years ago
    When my grandfather passed away, we found an old abacus in a box in the basement. Maybe I'll dust it off for this one.
  • harrydave
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    13 years ago
    Keeping the mind active helps avoid the onset of senility. From that perspective, that was good twaddle.
  • Clubber
    •
    13 years ago
    My index is easier. OK, Enjoyed, Enjoyed a lot, WOW, and I'm cumming...
  • joker44
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    13 years ago
    art, nice twaddle. senility hasn't set in yet; boredom maybe? seriously, index may not be so useful given other vaariables mentioned by earlier posters that add to enjoyment......... BUT the descriptive list of dance types could be very helpful to reviewers in describing their LD experience. add to list for various extras and, maybe, OTC...you just might be onto something if enough reviewers use your scale :)
  • gillydon
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    13 years ago
    An issue I just thought of with this index is that a club that sells $5 air dances would get the same score as a club that sells $30 very-high-contact dances, but these are two very different experiences. If you got 6 air dances you probably wouldn't equate that in value to one very high contact dance.
  • Prim0
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    13 years ago
    The problem with trying to standardize anything related to SCs is that we each have our own tastes and goals. Two guys having the exact same experience in an SC are going to score it differently no matter what we come up with as a standard. Nice try though FA!
  • crazyjoe
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    13 years ago
    how do you score it id a stripper farts in your face?
  • troop
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    13 years ago
    crazyjoe 05/31/11 7:13 AM how do you score it id a stripper farts in your face? ^^ LOL, well if your name is iamazero you'd score it as strip club nirvana!
  • trojangreg
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    13 years ago
    It's time to get off the drill and get your ass back to Vancouver. There are a couple of cuties at the 5 who miss your intelligent conversation. OOPS I meant cash. That way you can try your new index on their $50 lap dances.
  • rl27
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    13 years ago
    I have been coming up with a rating system over the last few years, until I most recently simplified it to the following. I first score the dancers by 3 categories in a scale of 1-10, and weigh them 25% facial looks, 30% body and 45 % for the Lap Dance. I then have the following points for ratings. Any dancer whose Lap Dance Rating >= 8 and Overall Rating > 8.5 gets one point. Anyone else gets 0 points and scoring goes no further. Then I add 2 x (2 - (10 -Lap Dance Rating)) + (2 - (10 - Overall Rating)). And then add or subtract points based off price $10 or less per song 3 points $15 per song 2.5 points $20 per song 2 points $25 per song 1 points $30 per song 0 point $35 per song -1 point $40 per song -3 points > $40 per song -5 points The maximum points a dancer can get is 10 at a club that is $10 or less a song. For example if the dancer is 10 face, 9 body and 6 dance, her rating is 7.9, she gets 0 points. My current favorite is 8 face, 9 body and 10 dance (my current favorite). Her overall rate is 9.2 and her lap dance is 10 so she gets 1 point. Add in 4 additional for a 10 in lap dancing and 1.2 points for her her overall rating of 9.2, gives her a total of 6.2 points before the club is factored in. She danced most of the time at a club where the dances were $25 a dance, so she got 1 extra point, which moved her to 7.2 points. When she moved to a club where the prices are $35 a song she dropped to 5.2, and I basically avoided the club. My all time favorite dancer, was 9, 9, 9.5 and danced at a club that was $10 a song, and her score at that club was 8.225.
  • steve229
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    13 years ago
    ^^^^^ I wondered what that guy was doing with a calculator in the strip club...
  • Clubber
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    13 years ago
    I'll stick with my index.
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