The shit we hear

rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
The other night I was in a road club and had the following discussion with a dancer...

HER: Things have been tough around here lately.

ME: That sucks. Have you thought about finding another club?

HER: I went to [XXX] down the street but I can't dance there because they do criminal checks. I got busted a few times for "dates."

ME: Wow, I'll never understand why the cops around here waste time with that crap.

HER: I know, right? They got me three times and each time it was a young good looking guy who said he just wanted a blow job. The next one is a felony and I already spent 11 months in jail.

ME: 11 months? For agreeing to have sex for money?

HER: No, the jail time was for some dope.

ME: Ouch, but hey, sometimes we do what we have to.

HER: Exactly, but I'm afraid of going back - it was horrible. Are you a cop?

ME: Do I sound like I'm from around here? Fuck no! (I lean forward and whisper in her ear) What do I have to do to prove that I'm not?

HER: (She opens her thong to give me access to her vagina) Touch me there...

I'll leave the rest of this encounter to the imagination. ;) Sometimes life is stranger than fiction

19 comments

Latest

  • chimark
    •
    14 years ago
    tells her story, and then she finally gets around to asking are you a cop??? LOL...
  • robbing1
    •
    14 years ago
    At the end, it seems like a win-win situation for both the gal and PL.
    I wonder what other ways are there for gals to try to distinguish LE's from PL's, besides engaging HM 2-way contact.
  • farmerart
    •
    14 years ago
    I probably book as many air miles as you do, rick; but not to places with the SC action you experience. You are a true road warrior, sir. Keep the stories coming. We bask in your aura.
  • txtittyfan
    •
    14 years ago
    Sometimes you just have to appreciate a dancer's honesty.
  • rickdugan
    •
    14 years ago
    farmer, I myself am simply a humble farmer that experiences a decent harvest every so often. Fertile conditions help a lot, but I also go to plenty of places where the pickings are thin.

    For example, I recently did a trip to D.C., where the strip clubs are so damned sterile and boring that I could barely be bothered. Another example is my most recent trip to Richmond, VA. While I have no doubt that, with enough $$$ and effort, I could have worked something out, I just have no interest in a very long and/or expensive pursuits in a road club.

    I seldom share the bland stories, of which there are many, but I do like to share when I have something entertaining to write.

    And as I've been telling you, certain parts of FL, TX and SC can be very fun, and relatively cost effective, places to hunt. Certain regions in these states have lots of strippers with dire cash needs.
  • rickdugan
    •
    14 years ago
    lol txtittyfan.

    chimark, I think it was an afterthought. Before this chat we were nibbling around the edges of OTC. Once her memories of prison and her mutliple prostitution busts all came back to the surface, she had a paranoid moment. I doubt she really thought I was a cop, but she wanted some type of assurance before she went further.
  • Slin
    •
    14 years ago
    Bro you should write a guide and post it up on here. Bonus points if you talk about the clubs in the NYC area.
  • gatorfan
    •
    14 years ago
    But when honestly becomes a criminal confession
  • shadowcat
    •
    14 years ago
    And just when you think you have heard it all......

    Thanks for sharing.
  • BaddJack
    •
    14 years ago
    My answer to the "are you a cop" query is usually this: "I USED to be a cop....but dick isn't..."
  • gatorfan
    •
    14 years ago
    stripper- are you a cop
    customer - did you say suck my cock
  • rickdugan
    •
    14 years ago
    slin, NYC is my home turf but it is not quite as fun as, and much more expensive than, certain southern states.

    shadow, after the mother/daughter story you told on here once I will always fell eclipsed. ;)
  • looneylarry
    •
    14 years ago
    One of my favs once was complaining about her legal troubles. She apparently threw a piece of lumber through a guy's car window and broke it. Wonder what the hell that was all about? She couldn't figure out why he was mad about that. LOL
  • BaddJack
    •
    14 years ago
    I am a criminal defense attorney, and some girls know it. When they hit me up for free advice on DWIs and whatnot, I always tell 'em that I can't be their lawyer as attorneys are not allowed to have sex with their clients.
    Most express loud and profane remonstrations about former lawyers that they blew or screwed.
    Priceless.
  • vincemichaels
    •
    14 years ago
    Thanks for sharing, rickdugan. I've heard similar when they get paranoid about opening up about their "sad" lives. Am I a cop they usually ask. I tell them stories about my youth and current experience with PIGS! They decide I can't be one and we go back to the VIP and have fun.
  • georgmicrodong
    •
    14 years ago
    What gets me is the ones that don't even both to ask. I can't count the number of times over the years that I've been propositioned for illegal stuff by girls who've just walked up and *maybe* had 2 minutes conversation with me. I'm all for not wasting time and getting right to the point, but that seems a little...incautious.
  • Slin
    •
    14 years ago
    Rick...sounds like you have the skinny on clubs in the NYC area. That's my prowling grounds as well so I'm hoping you'll have a few things to share. Maybe on another thread?
  • Book Guy
    •
    14 years ago
    So when you stuck your finger up her vagina did you find the dope?
  • rickdugan
    •
    14 years ago
    lol book - no, nor did a more detailed search later on produce and evidence of a drug crime. ;)

    slin, I have read your reviews and posts and I don't think there is much I can do to aid you in your quest. You like the higher end Manhattan clubs with lots of other white collar guys and dislike the sleazier joints. My gig is a bit different in that I search out the sleazy places with good bang for the buck. Also, you are coming in from Jersey while a lot of my clubbing now happens in Queens.
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