I dislike lap dances.

avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
At this risk of posting blasphemy around these parts, I really don't get much from lap dances. Most of the time they do nothing for me. And in the rare instances where they do get a reaction, now what? Hope that she jerks me off through or in my pants? Just walk away with a goofy grin?

Oh, and I also hate when girls do that do pseudo-intimacy crap where they "look deeply" in my eyes or purr in my ear.

No thank you, I'll leave that nonsense for others. I'm not searching for intimacy and have no really interest in being crawled on while I'm clothed. I also have 0 interest in blowing a load in my pants, even if a girl could get me to do so (not likely since I'm not a big fan of hand jobs).

I go to a club to: 1. see hot chicks; 2. be entertained by one of those hot chicks; and 3. source my OTC fun. And in a few special clubs my night ends with some great ITC action, but those are the exception rather than the norm.

And how do I build my OTC connections without lap dances? I tip for time, though I am always careful not to pay her too much ITC. IME it is a balancing act where I need to give her enough to be interested, but not so much that she is fat and happy before she leaves. Usually something in the area of $120-150 in tips, a few drinks, a view of the bankroll (subtly done of course) and a good chat gets me to the right place if there is an opportunity to be had.

I have been in over 50 clubs this year, but can count the times I've done lap dances on one hand. IMO lap dances are nothing but time and money wasters.

24 comments

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avatar for ww
ww
14 years ago
I can understand not being into lapdances...I have plenty of friends who are not into that. Of course, they also rarely go to stripclubs. To me $120 is a lot to pay just for time; you might as well get a lapper which includes time? Most times how a girls dances gives an indication of how their other skills are...not sure I would just take a girls word of her skills in a "chat" session. I would just probe a chick to see if she's down for OTC and talk for "free" or just skip clubs entirely and do escorts. Personally, I enjoy a good lap dance ("good" being subjective)!
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
14 years ago
With regard to the traditional grinding lap dance, I'd agree. If I'm buying lap dances, it's for the purpose of grope..., er, I mean, caressing her and finding out what her limits are. Around these parts dancer drink and lap dance prices are about the same, so I'd prefer to touch rather than just talk for the price.

For me, lap dances are an audition, not an end unto themselves.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
14 years ago
I can agree with gmd on this one, for the most part. As for dances in general, it depends on the club. Those that are basically air and or grinding, no thanks. The sensual dance, I am all for that, and if I can get off, well that is a plus. If I get her off, also a plus.
avatar for CTQWERTY
CTQWERTY
14 years ago
Rick, just scrolled through your reviews. Based on geography, I sense you're circling Detroit. Look forward to reading about your Motown experiences once they occur!
avatar for txtittyfan
txtittyfan
14 years ago
It's entertainment. There are better places than stripclubs for OTC.
avatar for farmerart
farmerart
14 years ago
I am sort of with rick and sort of not. Like rick I much prefer the comfort of an hotel for OTC. I am not averse to some ITC (usually BJs) but for the more vigorous activities an old guy like me really wants a big comfortable bed. But, like george, I like groping and caressing a lovely female body. If it leads to OTC fun, then fine. If not, I still enjoyed myself.

Besides, the more time I spend in a club having lap dances the less time I spend drinking. With me and excess booze in a SC my poor entertainment fund takes some vicious hits.

avatar for gk
gk
14 years ago
I get a little wery of lap dances too but not to the extent Rick describes. Too much gravity-driven grinding--bad, hopping up and down--forget it, airdance--I'll never see you again. It has made me very selective (and instructive with the right pupil).

But, as GMD, I like the lap dance so I too can grope, er, I mean explore the fine features of her beautiful body, find interesting places and maybe a place that excites her too...all while finding where her limits are--with my ultimate goal being to get her to exceed those limits. I may not do it on the first dance, but I will eventually if there is followup. And she better know how to drive or I'm not coming back (see other discussion).

And Rick, I still like to end up where you do, I just have different thrills in my journey.
avatar for Prim0
Prim0
14 years ago
I guess you could call LDs a fetish of mine. I get plenty of sex at home but every once in awhile I like to go back to the LD area with a hot young lady who will use her body to tease and please me even if my clothes are still on. I wouldn't mind if they pulled me out for some bjtccim but haven't found a dancer in cbus that would come close to that.

What the hell...I like LDs when they're done right...even if there's no sex.
avatar for lvlap123
lvlap123
14 years ago
i guess some like to be teased and some like to tease and some into action. Personally I am into LDs where there is good milege and a girl with good vibe, if not what is the whole point.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
14 years ago
rickdugan, that's cool. We all have our interests, some more intense than others. I guess I am a lap dance guy. OTC doesn't happen much for me, it is usually an ITC experience, but to each their own.
avatar for Philip A. Stein
Philip A. Stein
14 years ago
It's always been two camps here, O/ITC guys and the rest of us just adding some spice to our (sex) lives.

Before wifey caught me, I never had any intentions of fucking any stripper. After getting caught, I've been given the green light. I still have little desire to fuck these girls. I'm the grope master, I love those hot young titties. And to be sure, I don't mind some (ok, a lot of) hj or getting the stinky pinky.

I'm not trying to kid anyone, my time at the club drives me crazy later. I want to be in her bed. I want to fill her up. But then something kicks in and I say nope, thats for my marriage bed.

I don't know, fucked up, no?

It kinda reminds me of Rick's in Negril Jamaica. There's cliff dive there. The O/ITC guys are the ones that actual jump. The rest of us get our thrill just looking over the edge.
avatar for inno123
inno123
14 years ago
Honestly I am a bit puzzled about guys who spend a bunch of money in a club to set up their OTC action. With 120 to 150 spend in the club and then I am guessing an equal portion on the OTC time they are in the neighborhood of $240 to $300 getting laid. With that they could have just gotten as much or better in the VIP area or gone to cityvibe or backpage and set up a nice incall or outcall escort. Less money and fewer games.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
14 years ago
inno,

Different risks involved. Plus, the advantage to test drive, in a club, before you buy your "new" ride.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
14 years ago
inno, generally for me, the ITC "investment" is once. After that, it's almost all OTC with that girl.
avatar for txtittyfan
txtittyfan
14 years ago
inno,

Everyone has their own reasons for visiting a SC. From RD's posts, it appears to me he likes to dress up in suits and flash his wad to impress the girls for OTC action. Me, I have always visited SC's for entertainment, there is much better OTC than dancers.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
14 years ago
For those who said it is about the thrill/grope/tease, I hear ya' but I can't get my arms around it. I am more of an all or nothing kind of guy.

For those who point out that they have sex available at home, so do I, and with an attractive woman to boot. But it is fun to bang a younger girl every so often. I also don't feel the restraints that I do with the mother of my children. Ever had a girl who gets off on having her ass beat while getting fucked roughly from behind? I have, and she is currently in my rotation.

For those that say there are better places to get p4p pussy than a club, really? It is anonymous, deniable and the selection occurs in person. What's not to like? Years ago I used dial-a-hoe services a couple of times and just didn't like it. Nevermind the fact that nowadays these services are getting busted and, when they do, are eagerly coughing up customer names. IMO nothing beats getting to know a girl and discreetly taking her out of the club.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
14 years ago
tx, it's a little more subtle than that but you are not far off of the mark. The "flashing" is very subtle and sometimes not even necessary as the nice suit alone helps me to stand out in some of these mid-tier clubs.

And the purpose of my gig is not to "impress" per se, but rather to entice a cash hungry girl to make the right decision. ;) This approach might not have worked so easily 4-5 years ago, but in today's world it is fairly effective.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
14 years ago
"It is anonymous, deniable and the selection occurs in person. What's not to like?"

Exactly.

"Ever had a girl who gets off on having her ass beat while getting fucked roughly from behind?"

Uh, how about an introduction? :)
avatar for gk
gk
14 years ago
Rick, I like your attitude about it. You know what you like, you have a style and it works for you.

And I agree with everyone who says there is nothing better than test driving in a club or making our choices there with the corresponding teasing and flirting vs. a remote service that may or may not be reliable, how much better can we tee this up? It beats the alternative every time for me as a total experience.

Re suits. I stopped wearing them to strip clubs several years ago as a way to set myself apart from certain types of customers who I knew the dancers were typecasting in a negative way (a one-time thing, not a universal observation). I didn't want that to happen to me and I've been happy with the results ever since.

Giving up the suit has also enabled me to avoid being perceived as a big spenders. I prefer to be perceived as a consistent spender so dancers know what they can expect from me and inversely me from them. Over time I build real relationships, make certain investments and get reliable interest on those investments. Not that this is best for everybody, it's just working well for me right now.
avatar for harrydave
harrydave
14 years ago
RD, I'm pretty much with you. I used to enjoy lap dances a lot more. Now, I've seen every move a thousand times, and I sometimes make a game of determining the girl's mechanical dance pattern, because every one has a pattern. Now I prefer clubs where I can conduct an extended interview for OTC. My purpose is to judge attractiveness, compatibility, wildness, and availability. The other night in a Columbus club it took a $40 investment to determine the girl to my left and the girl to my right were both willing to head to my hotel.

The problem with all of this though is my insatiable quest for someone new. The repeated need for new investment in the club to achieve the OTC goal can be a drain on time and money. But the hunt is half the fun!
avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan
14 years ago
I think grinds are a waste of time, but if girls offer more it can be worth it.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
14 years ago
harry, DING DING DING - exactly! I love the buildup ITC almost as much as the actual event OTC. It is almost anti-climactic to go back to a club where you've secured a score when the same girl is working there, except in those rare instances where the previous experience was exceptional.

gk, I understand where you are coming from and agree that we all do what works for us. A lot of my club visits happen during travel, so the suit lets the girls know that I'm a traveling businessman - which in some places actually hastens the OTC offer. Also, I agree that the suit approach has its drawbacks in that it can bring out the vultures. However, I've become pretty good at working through the girls that are enticed by the sizzle to find those willing to work for the steak/stake.
avatar for gk
gk
14 years ago
Harry, I interview and try to fnd the wild ones too. The interview is part of the hunt which is an adventure itself, I agree. Take it to the limit.
avatar for troop
troop
14 years ago
i like getting a good lapdance, the key word being "good".
i like a hands on and mouth/tongue experience with a clean dancer that i know has good hygine habits early on her shift before the dregs get their hands on her. air dances and ass bouncing on my lap are not in the realm of good lapdances btw.
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