The glossary defines mileage as "How much shit you can get away with". But how do you know unless you try? Her limits may change from day to day and customer to customer. I say go for it. Yes, I have had my hand removed and heard NO, etc but that does not stop me. If I get rebuffed, I stop and move on to the next dancer. If her hand goes into my pants, I take that as a signal to go under her thong. Most of them will guide you along and let you know what their limits are. I some times ask "Am I pushing your limits". I have heard a little, which I take to mean proceed with caution.I have heard from favorite, "Not this week". Translation- I am on the rag. Sometimes a NO changes to Yes when they get to know you better or you spend a lot more money. Too much money is too much money. I am there to rent. Not buy. And so it goes...
Yes. When I take a new dancer to VIP, i start with touching her breasts during the first song and then move on to sucking them. If she stops me from sucking on the nipples, I'm done with her. If she's okay with my playing with her tits, I begin touching her pussy through the panties on the second song. If no objection, I slip my hand inside the panties on the third song. Sometimes they tell me to stop, but more often they don't. Of course, my favorite dancers already know what I like, and I know what limits they have (if any).
Fortunately, I don't usually have to spend a bunch of money in the VIP finding those things out. If those aren't available on the floor, they likely won't be forthcoming in VIP or OTC either.
Y'all are obviously better than I at pushing the limit, but I have a slightly different philosophy that has worked for me, but on the other hand doesn't get results as quickly, nor does it most likely get me laid as often as y'all.
First, I'm not just looking for any dancer that will let me do what I want. There's a dancer at HH that wants to take me into the "love corner" and fuck, but she just doesn't do it for me. (actually, I find her to be a turn off - mostly because she has ratty hair)
Second, I, like someone else said in another thread, look at the dances as an interview process for OTC. And that goes BOTH ways. I've always felt that I need to gain HER confidence and prove that I'm not Doug Bundy that is going to drop her body off somewhere. Also, I think it's important that she knows if she decides not to fuck and says "no", that I will stop. I've found that the type of girl that I'm interested in, responds to me NOT pushing her limits. I've had several girls say that they can give a better dance when they aren't worrying about where the guy's hands are and where they are going next. She can then relax and go as far as she wants.
Admittedly, this takes longer and a lot of times probably doesn't get me as far, either.
BUT, when I start talking OTC with her, I always am able to point out that she can trust me, and that I have proven that we will only go as far as SHE wants to go.
I HAVE had a lot of success employing this philosophy, and even though they don't always agree to the initial OTC proposition, eventually they have ALL agreed. Most of the OTC arrangements have been long-term that were very rewarding - in more ways than one (though that ONE way was good, too! [wink])
My recent three-ish year absence from the clubs was because I had two OTC "relationships" that I was involved in. (no reason to spend time in the clubs, when you can OTC with them) Eventually both of those relatiionships ran their course, but I was lucky enough after a visit to Industrial Strip (Hammond) to score another OTC arrangement that lasted until recently. Currently since returning, I've been working on two girls at my fav club, and I THINK I am nearing that first OTC meeting with at least one of them - maybe both.
Good; thread. I like what Shadowcat and Doug say. Both approaches work. I skew more toward Shadowcat's in assertiveness, but longterm I go for the trust aspect that Doug talks about. Trust brings you a lot of benefits.
It's a simple process: interview, test the limits, revisit or never again.
When I'm paying a stripper she should realize that's she's become my personal sex toy, strippers generally have no right to get offended when a paying customer cops a feel. Many times I slide hand over her ass and will slowly work my fingers towards her vagina. 9 times out of 10 they'll gently remove my hands, but there is always that one who likes it.
live: If you are asserting that paying a stripper automatically entitles you to do anything you want, I submit that you are dead wrong. Certainly if you've made that payment explicitly for certain things, and she's agreed to those things, then yes. But just because you've paid for a lap dance, doesn't all by itself entitle you to get your finger wet.
DougS, I don't entirely disagree with you. Mind, I don't have the *patience* you seem to, but your individual tactics aren't too far off from what I'm doing, even if my progress is somewhat accelerated.
what is the pink side address? and 2 maybe i dont do the assertive thing but i like to let teh stripper get comfortable enuf to tell me i can put my hands where. i was in a club a few weeks ago and i just wrapped my hands on her sides of torso. she later told me this is a touching club and i can grab her tits and play with the kitty on top if i wanted. i feel if you let them dictate it you can get farther than if you assert it then they came become standoffish and smear your name in the locker room
GMD: Patience does pay off. I'm not on your "accelerated" plan, but my visit last week to my fav club and several more hours spent with one of the two girls that I've been concentrating on produced an OTC, after she got off (and she DID, I might add, but that's another story). The OTC was after the third time that I visited her in the club, which doesn't require THAT much patience! Admittedly, the OTC hookup only lasted about two hours and only included dinner and some great conversation, but it was a big step towards my planned destination. With plans to spend more time soon.
Really, the key I think, is that we all need to have our own style; what feels comfortable and enjoyable to each of us. The beauty of it is there are no "set rules", and as we learn things along the way, we are free to employ new tactics and techniques. With that said, I think I've learned something from this post and may modify my plan of attack - just slightly - to add a LITTLE pushing of limits.
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First, I'm not just looking for any dancer that will let me do what I want. There's a dancer at HH that wants to take me into the "love corner" and fuck, but she just doesn't do it for me. (actually, I find her to be a turn off - mostly because she has ratty hair)
Second, I, like someone else said in another thread, look at the dances as an interview process for OTC. And that goes BOTH ways. I've always felt that I need to gain HER confidence and prove that I'm not Doug Bundy that is going to drop her body off somewhere. Also, I think it's important that she knows if she decides not to fuck and says "no", that I will stop. I've found that the type of girl that I'm interested in, responds to me NOT pushing her limits. I've had several girls say that they can give a better dance when they aren't worrying about where the guy's hands are and where they are going next. She can then relax and go as far as she wants.
Admittedly, this takes longer and a lot of times probably doesn't get me as far, either.
BUT, when I start talking OTC with her, I always am able to point out that she can trust me, and that I have proven that we will only go as far as SHE wants to go.
I HAVE had a lot of success employing this philosophy, and even though they don't always agree to the initial OTC proposition, eventually they have ALL agreed. Most of the OTC arrangements have been long-term that were very rewarding - in more ways than one (though that ONE way was good, too! [wink])
My recent three-ish year absence from the clubs was because I had two OTC "relationships" that I was involved in. (no reason to spend time in the clubs, when you can OTC with them) Eventually both of those relatiionships ran their course, but I was lucky enough after a visit to Industrial Strip (Hammond) to score another OTC arrangement that lasted until recently. Currently since returning, I've been working on two girls at my fav club, and I THINK I am nearing that first OTC meeting with at least one of them - maybe both.
It's a simple process: interview, test the limits, revisit or never again.
DougS, I don't entirely disagree with you. Mind, I don't have the *patience* you seem to, but your individual tactics aren't too far off from what I'm doing, even if my progress is somewhat accelerated.
Really, the key I think, is that we all need to have our own style; what feels comfortable and enjoyable to each of us. The beauty of it is there are no "set rules", and as we learn things along the way, we are free to employ new tactics and techniques. With that said, I think I've learned something from this post and may modify my plan of attack - just slightly - to add a LITTLE pushing of limits.