And now for something completely different

A Vegas club review...

"The nude grandmother that won the $1000 in the “Grandmother I like to F **K” was in her 70s. Her big move on stage was to touch her toes. She was not very flexible. No pole tricks for her. I just hope she is alive next year so she can defend her title of the “Grandmother I like to F**K”.

I felt sorry for the fat grandmother that was in her 60s that came out just before her because she did not win anything as far as I know unless they spilt the $1000 in some way. From where I was sitting, I could see her standing around the corner waiting for her entrance. The look on her face was priceless. It was like what is going to happen now. She was wearing a t-shirt with a big S on it. She was so fat I could not tell if she was wearing a g-string or was nude from the waist down. The women in the “Mother I like to F**K” and the women in the “Grandmother I Like to F**K” were all in good shape for their ages except for the last two contestants. She was the first of the last 2 contestants. I thought she got the loudest ovation when she came out. The club exploded. The girls in the audience were making the most noise. Grandmother took off her T-shirt and was parading around nude on stage. She also got the most money I ever seen thrown on a stage. There so many $1 bills thrown on the stage for the final two nude grandmothers that dancers that work at Little Darlings had to get baskets and help the grandmothers pick up their money. Grandmothers move a little slow.

After the last grandmother did her thing, all the mothers and grandmothers were brought out on stage together. The winner was determined by audience noise. The fat 60-year old grandmother was just beat out by the 70-year-old toe touching grandmother. I don't remember who won the “Mother I like to F**k contest".

In the Mother I like to F**K contest, had the mother of one of the dancers that worked there. She was cheered on by her daughter and threw ones on stage for her. The mother grabbed the pole and tried to swing but fell. The first mother that came out for the "Mother I like to F**K" came out, her body was so good I thought she could work at Little Darlings but her face did look old. All the women in the Mother I like to F**k contest were in good shape for their age but this is an 18 and up Club.

I don't know how Little Darlings made money that night. This was a Thursday night/Friday morning. They don't serve alcohol. I talked to some of the dancers and they said they were not making any money because people were waiting or watching the show. One dancer said she had been there since 9PM and now it was about 130am and she said she only had performed 2 dances. She said normally by now she would had earned $200. She was going to stay until 4AM and try to make some money. Since she was sitting on my lap for the last few minutes of the show and to keep people from leaving after the contest the DJ announced 3 songs for $20 immediately after the “Grandmother I like to F**K. I got dances from her. I ended up spending $80 on her and $50 on anther dancer. I strongly recommend Valerie and Cherry."