Nightmare Review, Literary Genius

avatar for harrydave
harrydave
New Jersey
Did any of you catch the long review just posted for a bad club in Missouri? It's a great piece of dark humor.

http://www.tuscl.net/d.php?DID=3872

19 comments

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avatar for steve229
steve229
15 years ago
Wow! An instant classic. I liked the Kafka reference.
avatar for Otto22
Otto22
15 years ago
This is what I enjoy about TUSCL. There are collegues here who have both the same bad habits I enjoy and the ability to write a coherent sentence. This review is filled with humor and jaded insight. Great one!
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
15 years ago
Great review. It reminded me of a similar experience 8 years ago at a place called Pleasers in Columbia SC. Now closed. I felt unsafe but ordered a drink anyway. Served in a plastic cup. Highlight was a fat chick with tattoos and missing teeth. 2 guys were sitting by the stage shoving $1.00 bills into her pussy. As I was leaving the manager or bouncer tried to stop me."I know that you are here for the girls".UGH! My review has long since disappeared from TUSCL. It was not as elaborate as Jacks but was an experience that I will never forget.
avatar for Vegeta1on1
Vegeta1on1
15 years ago
Funny as hell.
avatar for mmdv26
mmdv26
15 years ago
I stopped by this club for the first (and only) time back in January, so I am familiar with the layout and, from his descriptions, I might have seen some of the same dancers. Except for the scene in the truck, it was as if I was sitting over in the corner watching it all as I read his review. Very good story about a not so good club.
avatar for chandler
chandler
15 years ago
Yeah, way to go, Jack! I love how the worst clubs always bring out the best reviews. Founder, please give that man lifetime privileges. Or at least an extra month's.

In case anybody's too slow or lazy to use the link, the review it points to is by BaddJack for Pleasure Palace in Sweet Springs, Missouri.
avatar for snowtime
snowtime
15 years ago
Great review. I just finished reading it and found it captivating, like a good book. Hope his future reviews are as interesting as this one. Hope the next experience will be better for Jack, he should have used TUSCL reviews to steer him far away from this place.
avatar for Digitech
Digitech
15 years ago
Oooh, boy.

I pasted the link in, and I saw which club it is. I have actually been to this club, and it SUCKS MOOSE BALLS.

I am now going to read the review, I can't wait.
avatar for samsung1
samsung1
15 years ago
haha didn't tuscl have a top ten worst strip club rating a while ago? This would rate in the top ten probably.

Very entertaining review, thanks for posting the link.
avatar for Digitech
Digitech
15 years ago
^^^ Ok,I just read it.

In some ways similar to my experience, in some ways not.
First, there is a fudge packing factory (Adult Theatre) in the porn store next door. So a lot of truckers go in there and, you know.

My experience was a lot different. When I was asked for a dance, the woman gave me this long list of what I wasn't allowed to do. No contact in the G String area, above it or under it, no licking, no sucking, no oral contact, no penetration, don't take anything out, no hair pulling. She actually told me more than that, but I forgot some of it.


I always wondered how that place could stay in business with such craptaciular service. I remember riding past it when I was a teenager, and it's still open today.

I guess I understand now, if the girls come out of the club and wank you in your truck.
avatar for BaddJack
BaddJack
15 years ago
Thanks, all. I guess I got carried away....
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
15 years ago
I considered stopping in the year I drove from Omaha to my buddy's place in Clarksville, TN. I was going to go in, but I saw a couple of the ladies go in. One was beyond fat and one was clearly high, so I passed it up. I tend to tolerate fat chicks more than I should, but this one looked like she could barely walk properly. And I don't tolerate stoners and other drug users, at least if its obvious they were using.
avatar for arbeeguy
arbeeguy
15 years ago
It was a great review, I read it yesterday and it made me smile. But I wonder if every word was true. From what I know of the place, I seriously doubt that a dancer would come out to the club and give you a blow job. BUT WHO KNOWS. By the way, I have been to Pleasure Palace, and the place is AT LEAST as bad as the review indicated.

Yes, it was one of the most entertaining reviews I have ever read. THanks, BADDJACK
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
15 years ago
What got me was the OTHER reviews! 7's, 8's, 9's and even a 10??? My God, has the club gotten that bad or are there some that really enjoy Shamu, methgirl, Ratso, smelling/doing vomit, or "pussy"??

All in all, a good laugh.
avatar for OneAngryDwarf
OneAngryDwarf
15 years ago
Is there anyone else here who now has a perverse desire to actually visit this club just to see the living nightmare? It actually sounds like a fascinating microcosm of humanity that we don't get to see too often. :-)

All joking aside, great review...as someone who recently had a terrible experience in a club, I wish I could have written about it with such style.
avatar for Digitech
Digitech
15 years ago
Most of the good reviews of the club are from 5 years ago. Also, they are mostly the same guy reviewing the club over and over again and basking over his ATF, 'Isis.'
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
15 years ago
Digitech,

Correct, ergo, "My God, has the club gotten that bad...".
avatar for samsung1
samsung1
15 years ago
I agree with oneangrydwarf, that if I was ever in the area I would probably pay the club a visit just to see it.
avatar for stripclubspy
stripclubspy
15 years ago
Excellent review, BaddJack has a great talent that somehow got channeled into strip club reviews!!! Is there a New York Times Strip Club Review column??? There should be!!!
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