So I have to ask, because I'm nosy, just why you put up with the pieces that happened while you were present? I can understand not getting involved in back room fights or arguments, but why not, when the arm punching happened, a simple "I don't need a baby-sitter" to the friend? You don't strike me as someone who would be particularly overwrought be losing Sexy Italian's affections, so what's the deal?
Basically, aside from nosiness, I ask because laying down the law works, in most cases. My Favorite Cocksucker pulled that shit on me one time, telling other girls to stay away because I was hers. When I informed her that if I ever heard of her doing that sort of thing again, she'd never get another dime out of me, ever, it stopped.
gmd, fair question. The answer is I did - several times. I came down particularly hard one night on the friend, telling her things like "don't ever fucking touch somebody I am sitting with. In case it's not clear, noone owns me and you are screwing around with my entertainment. Don't ever fucking pull a stunt like that again." The other instances I put a stop to it soon after it started.
The reality, though, is that one can only do so much to control what a dancer will do in her habitat, and in particular in the dressing room. Read other posts on here and SW about disengaging from "favs." The reality is that most of the hardened SC hounds, more times than not, end up having to leave a club for awhile when they drop a fav.
I've learned from my road game that a dancer can burn you in a number of ways in a club, which is why I normally fly quietly under the radar. Now I've got missile locks and strafing rounds all over me.
I had a recently with Sexy Italian and I made sure she understood that this has already cost her a lot of money (I cancelled on an event the other night and did not give her much on my last visit). She swears that the situation is fixed as she tries to woo me back, but too little too late. Also too late for me at this club as I am now burned there and other dancers are avoiding me like the bubonic plague.
So, how do you say "PL" in Italian?
"I provided over half of what she made for that week"
Mama Mia! I think when you reach that level it changes the dynamic, and not in a good way.
I think George is on to something that us "nice guys" could learn. I for one am too forgiving of behaviors that I object too on the part of women who are stroking my ego, or dick, or both. But it's wrong to let that stuff slide, especially if it's escalating. When I was raising my kids, I believed there should be consequences for bad behavior, and the consequences should have some direct relationship to the offense. But to make that happen, I had to think about it some, because it's just not my natural response; I'm a live-and-let-live kind of guy. That suggests to me, in the case of "strippers behaving badly", that a little pre-planning is in order before we step through the door into the dark, issue-filled world of our favorite strip club. I find, when I think about various bad outcomes and behaviors, and plan my responses, I may not always follow the plan, but things tend to work behavior.
Or, to put it plainly with two pithy sayings:
I try to keep it on a basic level. My nature, and the nature of most men, is to try and get into her panties. Even men in monagamous relationships are always wanting into the panties of their wife or GF. Most of us play the game to get into her gstring. The girls, want to get into our wallet. So we want in theirs and they want in ours. There should exist some common ground where we both can get what we want. If they try to control you and you let them you are no different than a henpecked or cuckold husband. When some stripper does the stripper shit and tries to control you is when PLitis starts. You don't have to control the girls, just let them know you can do without their services or that someone else is available to get into my wallet without the BS. Just sayin.....
HD, nice guy is far from my gig, I'm an admitted asshole who will normally drop a girl at the first whiff of a problem. After years of doing this I usually have 0 tolerance for BS. But I will admit that I was infatuated with the girl, and her incredible pussy and oral skills once she stepped it up, enough that I let it go for longer than I should have. I will also admit that, because I have been a road monger for many years with limited visits to any one club, this local club reg/fav thing could have been managed better and I should have hammered Sexy Italian sooner about her friend's behavior.
If you read below you will see that I came down hard on the friend several times, but all she did is was move it from the floor to the DR. Perhaps if I had turned the screws on Sexy Italian's money sooner I could have headed off some off this. Now that I have shut the faucet off completely the girl is swearing that the problem is now fixed, but too late.
LOL steve and the dynamic was indeed changed, thoguh in this case it is what got me into this girl's pants. This club is one of the old style, NE limited extras type of place and, though one never really knows, I do believe that this type of OTC thing was not a common event for her. Only the prospect of gaining additional $$$ vs. losing what she was already getting finally pushed it over the hump (so to speak).
RD, I reread your post, and came up with an alternate theory to explain the drama in the club. That theory is predicated on my observation that for most strippers, what happens is not about you, it's about them. Is it possible that you were simply caught in the middle (and used as a prop) for the usual tendency of the experienced girls to try to drive out a more recent and threatening hottie? I have seen this in most clubs, and my GF has described what happens especially in the dressing room to the new girls who are a threat to the old guard. All kinds of confrontations, complaints to management, and other forms of sabotage are manufactured with the express purpose of driving the new girl away. Did you just step into that sort of situation?
rick, I see. It's not that you didn't attempt to curb it, but that it didn't work. Your attitude is completely understandable in that respect, and frankly, I can't say that I've reacted very differently on those occasions where something like this has happened to me. It's never been that drastic for me, i.e. actively keeping me away from other girls, though.
Comments
last commentSo I have to ask, because I'm nosy, just why you put up with the pieces that happened while you were present? I can understand not getting involved in back room fights or arguments, but why not, when the arm punching happened, a simple "I don't need a baby-sitter" to the friend? You don't strike me as someone who would be particularly overwrought be losing Sexy Italian's affections, so what's the deal? Basically, aside from nosiness, I ask because laying down the law works, in most cases. My Favorite Cocksucker pulled that shit on me one time, telling other girls to stay away because I was hers. When I informed her that if I ever heard of her doing that sort of thing again, she'd never get another dime out of me, ever, it stopped.
gmd, fair question. The answer is I did - several times. I came down particularly hard one night on the friend, telling her things like "don't ever fucking touch somebody I am sitting with. In case it's not clear, noone owns me and you are screwing around with my entertainment. Don't ever fucking pull a stunt like that again." The other instances I put a stop to it soon after it started. The reality, though, is that one can only do so much to control what a dancer will do in her habitat, and in particular in the dressing room. Read other posts on here and SW about disengaging from "favs." The reality is that most of the hardened SC hounds, more times than not, end up having to leave a club for awhile when they drop a fav. I've learned from my road game that a dancer can burn you in a number of ways in a club, which is why I normally fly quietly under the radar. Now I've got missile locks and strafing rounds all over me. I had a recently with Sexy Italian and I made sure she understood that this has already cost her a lot of money (I cancelled on an event the other night and did not give her much on my last visit). She swears that the situation is fixed as she tries to woo me back, but too little too late. Also too late for me at this club as I am now burned there and other dancers are avoiding me like the bubonic plague.
So, how do you say "PL" in Italian? "I provided over half of what she made for that week" Mama Mia! I think when you reach that level it changes the dynamic, and not in a good way.
Quite the read! For any would-be delusional PL, it does reinforce items 1, 2, and 3 as to why dancers work: money.
Rick, A song for you:
I think George is on to something that us "nice guys" could learn. I for one am too forgiving of behaviors that I object too on the part of women who are stroking my ego, or dick, or both. But it's wrong to let that stuff slide, especially if it's escalating. When I was raising my kids, I believed there should be consequences for bad behavior, and the consequences should have some direct relationship to the offense. But to make that happen, I had to think about it some, because it's just not my natural response; I'm a live-and-let-live kind of guy. That suggests to me, in the case of "strippers behaving badly", that a little pre-planning is in order before we step through the door into the dark, issue-filled world of our favorite strip club. I find, when I think about various bad outcomes and behaviors, and plan my responses, I may not always follow the plan, but things tend to work behavior. Or, to put it plainly with two pithy sayings:
I try to keep it on a basic level. My nature, and the nature of most men, is to try and get into her panties. Even men in monagamous relationships are always wanting into the panties of their wife or GF. Most of us play the game to get into her gstring. The girls, want to get into our wallet. So we want in theirs and they want in ours. There should exist some common ground where we both can get what we want. If they try to control you and you let them you are no different than a henpecked or cuckold husband. When some stripper does the stripper shit and tries to control you is when PLitis starts. You don't have to control the girls, just let them know you can do without their services or that someone else is available to get into my wallet without the BS. Just sayin.....
HD, nice guy is far from my gig, I'm an admitted asshole who will normally drop a girl at the first whiff of a problem. After years of doing this I usually have 0 tolerance for BS. But I will admit that I was infatuated with the girl, and her incredible pussy and oral skills once she stepped it up, enough that I let it go for longer than I should have. I will also admit that, because I have been a road monger for many years with limited visits to any one club, this local club reg/fav thing could have been managed better and I should have hammered Sexy Italian sooner about her friend's behavior. If you read below you will see that I came down hard on the friend several times, but all she did is was move it from the floor to the DR. Perhaps if I had turned the screws on Sexy Italian's money sooner I could have headed off some off this. Now that I have shut the faucet off completely the girl is swearing that the problem is now fixed, but too late. LOL steve and the dynamic was indeed changed, thoguh in this case it is what got me into this girl's pants. This club is one of the old style, NE limited extras type of place and, though one never really knows, I do believe that this type of OTC thing was not a common event for her. Only the prospect of gaining additional $$$ vs. losing what she was already getting finally pushed it over the hump (so to speak).
RD, I reread your post, and came up with an alternate theory to explain the drama in the club. That theory is predicated on my observation that for most strippers, what happens is not about you, it's about them. Is it possible that you were simply caught in the middle (and used as a prop) for the usual tendency of the experienced girls to try to drive out a more recent and threatening hottie? I have seen this in most clubs, and my GF has described what happens especially in the dressing room to the new girls who are a threat to the old guard. All kinds of confrontations, complaints to management, and other forms of sabotage are manufactured with the express purpose of driving the new girl away. Did you just step into that sort of situation?
rick, I see. It's not that you didn't attempt to curb it, but that it didn't work. Your attitude is completely understandable in that respect, and frankly, I can't say that I've reacted very differently on those occasions where something like this has happened to me. It's never been that drastic for me, i.e. actively keeping me away from other girls, though.