PL Seeks Arrangement: My SA experience so Far

Subraman
Car key and wallet dating your sister
For those interested in SeekingArrangment, here are my experiences.

I have been lucky enough to find some sex forums with decent sized populations of experienced or wanna-be sugar-daddies, to help fill out and/or confirm some of the perspectives. I joined SA thinking my goal would be to score a classic sugarbaby...

**Executive Summary**: Since this is tuscl, and most of you are executives, I'll start with an executive summary: I've had mixed experiences on SA overall -- for those wondering: yes, for me, OTC is resoundingly still the best experience in the sex industry. But if strip clubs disappeared tomorrow, I'd move onto SA wholesale, no doubt. For all I know, I'm just one awesome SB away from changing my mind completely ... but so far, I have NOT scored a classic SB, mostly because I just couldn't find anyone the interested me enough to engage at this level; I'm also not interested in escort-like interactions, but have indulged in some fun OTC-like meetings that are available on SA. If this entire report is TL;DR, I'd suggest you read just one thing, #5 in the Insights section, at the very bottom of this article.

**The Girls**: I think of the girls of SA in 3 groups, although these groups significantly overlap, and one girl can be in multiple groups at the very same time

Group 1: "Classic" Sugarbabies: they're looking for a sugardaddy/sugarbaby relationship, at levels of support ranging mostly from $1500/month but mostly higher. Sugarbaby tends to imply a bit more engagement in each others' lives: experienced sugardaddies consistently talk about how they're in contact with their SBs over text and phone, help them through life crises, give them business advice, take them on vacations, and overall just how big a part of their lives the SBs are. Some of these girls are very high quality women: white collar women who just need extra help, women on a success track at local universities, smart, interesting, reliable women. Of course, you will also find all kinds of other women: strippers, escort types, flakey hot chicks, etc., all also looking for a sugardaddy.

Group 2: Escort, escort-adjacent, and OTC-like girls: These range from outright escorts who are using SA as an extension of their business, to "sugarbaby light" girls who are okay with per-meeting payment (rather than monthly allowance) but who want to limit interactions to sexual dalliances, to girls whose model is very much like OTC with a stripper, where they're perfectly happy eating and drinking and partying with you for hours before or after the sex. In other words: whatever you're feeling like, you can probably find it on SA

Group 3: Strippers and ex-strippers. There's so many strippers on SA that it's worth calling them out separately. Obviously, they all fit into one or both of the groups above... although sometimes, they'll suggest that for your first meeting, that you meet them at their stripclub. I'll have more comments on them below.

**Pricing**: As part of their profile, the girls all set an "expectation", that ranges from Minimal (less than $1000/month, VERY few of them) and goes up in grades all the way to High (greater than $10,000/month). Don't get too intimidated by that, I've routinely talked girls in the Practical, Moderate, and Substantial (up to $10,000/month) down to OTC-level pricing, $300-$450 per meeting. Most girls will agree to per-meeting payment for the first few times you meet, even the classic sugarbabies who will eventually demand to move to monthly allowance.

In my discussions with very many experienced sugardaddies, most of the ones with multiple successful sugarbaby arrangements are paying in the range of $3500-$5000 per month, if you count allowance *plus* all the other money spent on the sugarbaby (gifts, hotel rooms, travel, food & drink, etc). Here and there I've heard of less, but that $3000+ range seems to be the magic number.

****** What you're here for: Insights and Experiences ********
1. The $3500/month sugardaddies are having a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE than what I"ll describe below ... those of us looking to spend closer to $1500/month, all pretty uniformly (with only rare exceptions) agree with my experiences up and down the line. But the $3500+ club is having a much more fun time of things, and virtually nothing I say below applies to them.

2. Flakiness rules. If you think strippers are flakey, SA brings that to a whole 'nother level. Be ready to deal with a lot of flakiness, although the one mercy is that much of the flakiness happens in the email negotiation leading to the date, which means you've only wasted your online time writing emails. That said, there ARE reliable, civilian women on SA, who are far more reliable than this overall experience, you'll just go through an insane amount of flakiness to find them.

3. No one looks like their pics. Unlike strip clubs, but JUST LIKE escorts, Tinder, Match.com: no one looks like their pics, they've all chosen their very best amazing pics from 5 years ago, took pictures from strategic angles, etc. Just like when meeting an escort or a girl from Tinder for the first time, just expect her to be thicker and less pretty than she looked in that pic, sometimes shockingly so.

4. The girls are annoyed with you. Well, maybe not you personally, but with the men on the site. And not without reason, they've been treated pretty disrespectfully in emails, and so it will pay you back huge dividends if you take a little time learning to write profiles and emails that come across both respectful and confident. This, by the way, may be at least partially responsible for the flake rate, the girls might be reading deeply into everything you write, and bolting at any little thing that bugs them.

5. There are a LOT of strippers and ex-strippers on SA. One of the things I learned: I have an amazing radar for strippers. So far I'm 100% on figuring out when I guess a girl I'm at a meetup with is a stripper or ex-stripper. Going further, nearly all of the best looking women I met on SA are strippers or ex-strippers, and if I further narrow that down to "maximum sum of looks plus fun personality": 100% strippers and ex-strippers. That also led me to another insight: Subraman, I says, if so many hot SA women are strippers, perhaps many active working strippers are on SA. So in the strip club, I've been doing a little experiment: during the conversation, I organically work into the conversation that "I haven't been to the club that often recently because I'm on SA... I really want a sugarbaby to take care of." This has been an unadulterated hit for me. More than half the strippers I've said this to, whipped out their phone and showed me their SA profile, and then we had fun swapping crazy SA stories. 100% of the strippers gave me an "awwwww!" and became VERY interested. In fact, unlike some of you guys, I almost NEVER get propositioned for OTC, I always have to ask and pursue the stripper.... except now, I'm getting strippers hinting or asking outright, "we should meet up, I wanna be a sugarbaby", etc. All in all, at worst it leads to fun conversation, at best it gets the strippers asking ME for OTC (I realize tuscl PLs are seasoned enough not to care much about this, we're all used to asking for OTC, but it IS a little bit of a kick to be the one asked instead of doing the asking). One of my buddies has been so impressed with this that he's planning to set himself up a dummy profile on SA, just to be able to flash it...lol


*** In summary: I've enjoyed the experience and am still indulging, but it has not remotely shaken my preference for strippers, ITC and OTC. And perhaps that's really where I am mentally and emotionally right now: perhaps I am not really ready or interested in having a SB be so much of my life, the way things work with those more experienced high-$$$ sugardaddies I mentioned, much less being interested in laying out that kind of cash. OTC with strippers may just scratch my itch. I'm still looking for a more classic sugarbaby arrangement on SA, but am no closer than when I joined nearly a year ago, and tend to be pulling the trigger on SA meetups when it's more OTCish.

59 comments

Latest

  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    Why not seek and obtain what you want via f2f first meetings, like in strip clubs.

    Always for the girl there will be an anxiety factor, wondering if the guy will go for her, when the first meeting has not been f2f. And this is hard to fake, she will feel it in her bones.

    But if you approach her in a strip club, this anxiety is gone. Approaching her yourself f2f carries a lot of weight. Probably, whatever you want, you will get.

    SJG
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    #5--As I have also experienced there are a fair amount of strippers in the making as well......girls who haven't yet but end up working as strippers.

    Profession number two I might add is bartender and many times they are bartenders at SCs.

    #4--I can't agree with this statement more--most are not just annoyed they are outright anti-men. I do whatever I can to set myself apart from the local guy ( local to the girl) who seems to lack all semblance of social graces and being a gentleman.

    #3--So far I've avoided this from happening to me too often--only once was it really bad. It took everything to not say " did you show up to check me out for your daughter?" About 90% of the time when I meet someone they come dressed to kill, especially if we are meeting for a drink after 7 PM.

    #2-yes, yes, yes......most of the time it is because they do not want to tell us something being a stripper is one--having a kid is two--still being in a relationship is three--and for the real civi's waiting till the wolf is at the door for rent, electric, car repossessed any day now, is four.....you can also do a combo on some of these........

    #1--yes and no.....as far as the best sugar experience I ever had on sex and sex alone it was with a girl who wanted 400 a night--not an hour a night. If it wasn't for a ton of other baggage she had including a kid. She was ex-military and she was hot. She had a job and worked promotional work --they are out there.
  • Lone_Wolf
    7 years ago
    Great article. A term used in the sugar world is "rinser". A rinser is a SB that is looking for a SD that will pay them for a platonic relationship. Those type of SD's are referred to as a unicorn. lol. Have you run into any "rinsers" in your search?

    Funny thing is whenever a SB is interviewed by the media 90% of them swear their SD gives them 10k a month with no sex expected. Total BS of course but it does drive a bunch of delusional honey's to SA looking for unicorns.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    -->"Why not seek and obtain what you want via f2f first meetings, like in strip clubs."

    SJG, that's how seeking arrangements works... you see her profile, feel each other out in messages, and if she hasn't bolted by then, you meet over drinks (or whatever), which is basically an audition for both of you. There's a few girls who ask to be paid for their time just for the no-sex initial meeting, but I have never done so, and there are soooo many women on the site that there's little reason to.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    Haven't heard that term before, but I like it! Any idea where it came from, what it means?

    Most rinsers I"ve run into, say it right on their page -- "just looking for a friendship, no sex" or whatever. I have twice run into girls who sprung, "I would like to start out no sex, but it is a possibility once I get to know you" on me after we'd messaged a while. I always tell them something like, "If we meet and enjoy each others' company, I'm fine meeting a few more times until you get comfortable enough to decide, but the benefits should go both ways (intimacy and allowance) so until there's intimacy, I'm not comfortable paying an allowance". So far, those girls immediately politely excuse themselves when I say that.
  • twentyfive
    7 years ago
    Interesting take Subra, I haven't really been interested in doing this myself but every once in a rare while I'll meet a stripper who asks me if I might be interested in making her my sugarbaby.
  • shailynn
    7 years ago
    Great article, as anything Subraman writes is useful info. I would like to add, Subraman lives in a large metropolitan area, PLs like me that live in smaller or more rural area will have much less to choose from. I have had more success in the past searching while I was traveling in larger cities.

    Subraman seems to run into strippers, and he's on the west coast, I ran into a lot of divorced or even freshly separated MILFs in the midwest who just wanted someone to take them out for shopping, dinner and drinks and just wanted some attention. Some of these women wanted sex more than I did, they just wanted a guy who could afford to take them to dinner and a night away from their normal lives and asked for minimal in return. Those were the days... as time went on women (even the MILFs) expectations became higher, as well as their compensation demands. Eventually I deleted my account and didn't look back. Tinder took it's place for me when visiting larger cities.

    Side note, I read Houston has the most SBs on SA of any city in America.

    Subra - I wasn't clear on your article, are you really looking for an SB - monthly type of arrangement or are you looking more for OTC on SA? Granted the quality of a girl on SA would probably be higher than what I can pluck out of a strip club, but I could do 7 OTC sessions with a stripper for what most SBs on SA would expect for 1 month which would give me 2 sex sessions if I was lucky.
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    Girls do not pay for site membership--guys do. From what I understand the owners of the site --mostly Brandon Wade--have a part of the site that "schools" the SB's on what to say and how to go about getting what they want.

    I've had a one ask me to pay to meet and when I politely declined she informed me I didn't understand her time was worth something....I pointed out to her what I charge my clients per hour..............as an example of what my time was worth......oddly it seemed to end the conversation :--)

    I've had a couple of rinsers approach me--all in the Maryland area ---DC Beltway and a bit north.......I don't mind a first date ( no money up front) and to pick up the tab for drinks, dinner, etc but as has been stated before the allowance starts when the intimacy starts.
  • Papi_Chulo
    7 years ago
    "... I've had a one ask me to pay to meet and when I politely declined she informed me I didn't understand her time was worth something ..."

    Entitled dumb hos - greedy ass bitches - it's a business meeting - if anything she should be paying the dude to earn/acquire his future business
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    Shai: I went into this SA adventure thinking I wanted to experience a classic sugarbaby, but I haven't come that close on pulling the trigger. So, I've made the best of the situation and been enjoying some OTC-like sessions, very often with strippers -- who are also the best looking and most fun girls on SA. I have met a good number of "high quality" women, as I said in the article, but none had the combination of both beautiy and fun personality I'm looking for. My therapist might tell you that this is because I don't REALLY want a sugarbaby, that it's OTC that scratches my itch, but the story I'm sticking to is that I continue to look for a SB if one comes along.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    -->"I've had a one ask me to pay to meet and when I politely declined she informed me I didn't understand her time was worth something....I pointed out to her what I charge my clients per hour..............as an example of what my time was worth......oddly it seemed to end the conversation :--) "

    Warren, I don't think there's much to gain by engaging in this argument, but if you want to do it just for fun... I talked about it twice, once with a stripper who wanted obviously wanted explore with me the psychology behind why men will or won't pay for the initial date, and another time at a first meeting where the potential-SB was probably feeling me out to see if she could ask me for anything. Both times, I told them that if the risk were one-way, I might be able to see it, but with so many girls flaking out and so few girls looking like their pics, if I offered to pay for no-sex first meetings, instead of just being out hours and hours of my time, I'd also be out thousands of dollars, and VERY irritated over it.

    BTW, since I first wrote and submitted that article, I've been to the SC twice, and am two-out-of-two on "accidentally" bringing up with the stripper that I'm on SA and looking for a SB, and both girls were on SA also. One of the girls immediately texted me a screenshot of her SA profile, "let's meet up!". The other was interested as well, although she told me outright she'd created the profile a year ago and hadn't done much with it -- I think a huge % of strippers create profiles, but once they realize it will be a little work finding a compatible SD, they give up. But man, her eyes lit up when she realized there was a potential SD right there in front of her! It's turning out to be a fun gimmick
  • JamesSD
    7 years ago
    Great article. 2-4 are true for women on all dating sites
  • Papi_Chulo
    7 years ago
    I looked at SA once briefly and was not impressed w/ what I saw - and seemed like too-much work for someone like myself that is into immediate gratification.

    I think many of those girls are delusional and looking for Prince Charming (or think there are plenty of suckers out there that can be easily manipulated) that will take them on shopping trips and nice vacations and do nothing more than be arm-candy - i.e. they wanna be spoiled like a princess w/ zero/minimal work on their part.

    I also get the feeling some/many of them may just stick mostly to the "pay me to meet" hustle where they can consistently score a couple of hundred bucks w/ no intention of taking it further (unless it was a whale SD).
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    -->"2-4 are true for women on all dating sites:

    Heh, good point! Flakiness, no one looks like their pics, the women are annoyed with you
  • shailynn
    7 years ago
    Well we all know everyone on TUSCL makes at least $350k so I may be wasting my breath...

    I would define the true meaning of a seassoned PL on here... as someone that is fucking a lot of strippers for money, and not wasting their time with lapdances, phone/text-tagging, etc. etc. A lot of guys on here want to pay a certain amount and fuck a stripper ITC or OTC, end of story. Some of us get caught up with some sort of relationship with a stripper, but most of us don't.

    A SD to me is a whole different aspect. These guys want to share experiences with their SB more than just sex. In addition to money their SB may be in college and need guidance, their SB wants to go on vacation with their SD. I'd bet more SDs bring their SB to their home than PLs bring strippers inside. I'd also be willing to bet most SDs make a higher income than the average PL.

    I've done it all, married MILFs, strippers, bored divorced women, some sort of form of SD/SB and strippers seem to be the easiest avenue to get your dick wet at the least amount of money. If you want more than that, you may want to look at the alternatives I listed above.

    After all, it's a lot easier to convince a stripper into doing something that hasn't graduated high school than a SB that is in law school. Trust me, I know there's a bunch of strippers in law school right now... I'm just sayin' lol!!!!!!!



  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    By and large, strippers come from dysfunctional homes. If they're not messed up with daddy issues before becoming strippers, being groped and borderline raped by customers messes them up eventually.

    So thank God for American capitalism that has made college unaffordable to today's young college girls. And thank God for mainstream "sugaring" because these girls no longer have to call themselves "prostitutes," even though it amounts to exactly the same thing.

  • HungryGiraffe
    7 years ago
    Excellent article Subraman! Thanks!
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    "Warren, I don't think there's much to gain by engaging in this argument, but if you want to do it just for fun.."

    As a rule I go out of my way to be nice, sometimes to the point of it can come back and bite me in the backside. In this case the back story is the girl didn't bring up her meet fee as I will call it until right before we were to meet....last minute ( see my comment above about waiting until the wolf is at the door --probably a bill was past due----) Had she been honest with me who knows I might have been helpful. One of the red flags for me at least is asking for a fee upfront.......someone who thinks only their time has any value isn't using their brain.for what the good lord gave it to them for....the minute she asked for an upfront fee any chance was past.....
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    7 years ago
    Great article. I've been curious about this topic and there's lots of useful information.

    What is the fee structure and are there options for anonymous payment? Yes, I know that I could use a Vanilla Visa, but I'm curious if there are other options.

    How much of your personal information do you need to give up in order to join?

    Thanks again for the great content.
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    Ishmael--they do offer anonymous payment options. I have a separate e-mail address on a offshore provider set up for SA and I do not show any real information. It's all close in terms of my age, look, location ( but I also travel so I can be anywhere in the USA)

    And no pictures--for me it would be nuts.

    Ashley Madison ( a rival site) got hacked a few years ago. If people were not being cautious prior to then they sure as hell should be after that little revelation.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    7 years ago
    Warren... Thanks. The Ashley Madison hack is specifically why I asked those questions.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    I have face pics in my private pic section, which I realize is a hacking risk. On the other hand, I'm not married and, while dating, no current committed girlfriend, so no huge risk other than, I suppose, the risk of coworkers seeing or whatever, which I'm also not terribly worried about. Think I'm dismissing this too lightly?
  • James1557
    7 years ago
    I have a sexy pay per meet SB who used to be a stripper (though that is not how I met her). Intriguingly she loves coming to strip clubs with me as a customer usually wearing very sexy gear (short dress, no underwear, for example).
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    As a general rule, bringing strippers (and ex-strippers) to strip clubs is outrageously fun, IME. I've been getting PMs from guys about SBs who are strippers or ex-strippers also ... not at all surprised that strippers are also outrageously fun as SBs, nor that so many guys end up with stripper SBs considering how many strippers are on SA (and how strippers are in general among the most attractive girls on SA).

    Interestingly, in my conversations with the high-$$ SDs I mentioned at the beginning, I get a clear sense that those guys are specifically avoiding stripper types -- they're looking for non-nonsense, no-flakiness, smart SBs, especially for that price, especially because of how much they're looking to integrate these girls into being part of their lives.
  • skibum609
    7 years ago
    Incredibly interesting article. I have a sibling who has a SB in the 5k per month range and this article at least helped me understand where he's coming from.
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    "Think I'm dismissing this too lightly?" I think it depends on each individual person. For me it is too much of a risk for multiple reasons I won't comment on publicly.

    Myself, I try and get the conversation off the site as fast as possible and not to texting but e-mail--through the encrypted account overseas I referenced.

    Happy to send a recent pic or two (nobody has ever run from my picture nor have I broke any mirrors lately by looking into them)
  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    I'm definitely in the camp that avoids strippers on SA; I filter them out. The mystique of paying strippers for sex vanished a long time ago for me. It's possible to filter out everyone expect for girls that have current edu accounts. Meet & greets are unpaid Starbucks dates to eliminate any possibility of escorts. I live in a major metro area and do not spend anywhere near $3500 to $5000, although it's always at my house which saves a lot on hotel bills. Mine have been long term and with responsible girls that I can take into my neighborhood. Last two went unprotected with no problems (tested recently).

    I also discuss sugaring whenever I'm in a strip club and I'd estimate that 3/4 of strippers have tried sugaring at least once. It stands to reason that a stripper would rather have one clean professional guy supporting them than grinding on random dicks all night long.
  • Warrenboy75
    7 years ago
    I neither avoid them or look for them but SA when I first started on the site and now are two different animals entirely and there is little doubt over the past couple of years the amount of sex workers in one form or another have migrated over to SA.

    I am similar to Subraman in that I can tell the majority of the time by how the profile is written and the pictures and if there is doubt it comes to the surface within the first couple of exchanges of comments.

    SA is still my best and first source of P4P and has been now for 4 plus years. I've had two what I would consider long term arrangements One in Philadelphia and one in Northeast Ohio --the one in Northeast Ohio went on to become a stripper but was not one when we first met- after we split it was the direction she took. It's a long and somewhat sad situation. The one in Philly got her degree and seems to have gone on to a good life.

    I tend to be on the clock most of the day so most of my first meets are for a drink at a place they are comfortable with meeting me and I don't expect anything to happen on the first meeting-ever. It has ( multiple times) but it is 100% their choice when it does and they are the one to make the first move.

    2nd meet is a different story entirely.

    In my case I am always away from home base--even if just 20 miles down the road. I've had a few that could pass as school teachers---one that actually was a school teacher
    ( 5th grade to be exact)
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    7 years ago
    @subraman... In the world of identity theft and such, obtaining face pics is a cherry on top for hackers and data miners. Several social media platforms now use facial recognition AI algorithms to confirm accounts where they see suspicious behavior. There are indicators that financial and business services are moving in that direction.

    TL;DR... I wouldn't do it. I have enough knowledge in this area to feel justified about my level of paranoia.
  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    @SkiBirther wrote: "Incredibly interesting article."
    -----------------------------

    @SkiBirther: could have sworn you dismissed this whole scene as thinly-veiled and glorified prostitution that last time the topic came up. You should really make up your mind.

    In reality it *is* just a benign middle-class form of prostitution.
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    This does look interesting:
    https://www.seekingarrangement.com/joinf…

    Subra, so are you looking for a Sugar Baby?

    Would you want to put her on retainer, or just pay her with each session? Would she be yours exclusively, is that why the retainer?

    You know there are semi-pros. The reals semi-pros do not place ads, you have to place your own ad. And usually a lunch date for the first meeting, no sex.

    But still, why not just get a girl from your favorite strip club, and put her into the role you want? I am firmly convinced that it is always better with f2f first meetings.

    SJG

    I feel sorry for people who live in places without Viet Coffee
    https://thebravenewworlddotnet.files.wor…
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    SJG: I am looking for a sugar baby. Whether I give her an allowance ("retainer") or pay per session is just a footnote. If I'm paying the same amount either way, it doesn't make any difference to me. The main difference is probably in the psychology of the sugar baby: it helps a girl who would not be willing to participate in the sex industry, pretend that she's not -- after all, she gets a monthly allowance no matter what, and everything else she does that month is her choice (not really, but you get how a person can fool themselves).

    Why not just get a stripper to do this? Well, in retrospect, I've had arrangement-lite relationships with a number of strippers. The reason to do this on SA is because SA's "we're not part of the sex industry; no really, we're not" structure gives sugardaddies access to higher quality women. I've met women who are in very prestigious local universities and who just need some help now (probably make more than me when they get out. bitches!!), I've met women who are educated and building a career and just need some help since they live in the most expensive area of the country. So, while SA is drowning in strippers and escorts, there's still plenty of educated, high-quality women, too, who would likely never be part of the sex industry if it weren't for the charade SA constructs. Ignore the man behind the curtain.

    My own journey has me wondering whether I'm REALLY looking for a "high quality sugarbaby". Maybe I just haven't met the right civilian girl; or maybe I'm finding fault in all of them because they're not what I'm looking for. Perhaps what I'm looking for is a smoking hot chick who is super fun -- a stripper or civilian "hot partygirl" -- and I'm not willing to sacrifice on either score, even for a better educated sex partner. I'm not particularly looking for deep conversations from this area of my life, I have work and friends for that, and all the higher quality women I met on SA either seriously lacked on looks or on fun-factor attitude, and I'm not about to sacrifice either quality just to get a Berkeley student. Maybe just what my particular desires are at the moment.
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    So you definitely want a non-pro, or semi-pro at the most. Now I understand.

    But you could try to find such by placing your own ad, get much less professionalized girls that way. If the girl has an ad, she really is a pro.

    Or you could just find some channel by which to meet girls f2f.

    I understand now what you are seeking.

    SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    Like in the first edition of Helen Gurly Brown's "Sex and the Single Girl", the way to get it going is to take the girl to lunch, then shopping, then to a motel. Then after that you'll soon be able to just hand her cash.


    SHG
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    ^^^^^^^ SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    Every pay the girl by check, and try to make it with untaxed funds?

    SJG
  • yahtzee74
    7 years ago
    ugh subraman... I think I'd rather fuck a streetwalker than a "smart" educated woman who can't figure out how to make ends meet without fucking guys for money.
  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    LOL!
    I know of one med student who had an MD SD. But it still all boils down to what it is.

    Prostitution!!
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    -->" I think I'd rather fuck a streetwalker than a "smart" educated woman who can't figure out how to make ends meet without fucking guys for money."

    I think it'd be a kick for my OTC to be a smart, educated girl who is reliable and actually shows up when she says, doesn't live her life from drama to crisis back to drama again. But, as I said in my long-winded reply to sjg, I'm not willing to sacrifice looks or that fun partygirl attitude one single bit, that's the main itch I want scratched
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    Subra, I understand your objective. You could find civvies and civvie college girls who will meet your need.

    Some semi-pros actually live with their parents, and the money helps them buy things, like clothes, and build a nest egg.

    Girls who live in dormitories won't be good. They take shit from the other girls. But ones who live elsewhere, and especially those with jobs, they'll do just fine. You don't have to tell her she is your SB or your P4P either.

    https://www.amazon.com/How-Date-Young-Wo…

    When the Zen teacher Alan Watts used to go on college lecture tours, he had to fight them off. Every weekend he was in a new place, and new college girls trying to jump him. Can't deal with that many at the same time.

    R. Don Steele explains that lots of young women want the experience with an older guy. Its not a majority, its like 5 to 10%. But you see, that's so many that you'll be mobbed. Sure, eventually they will probably marry someone closer to their own age, but not always. Anyhow, they want the older guy experience. They want the older guy because he is different from the boyfriends. Don't know much about you Subra, but I can tell that you've got what it takes.

    Even Lolita runs on a theme like that. Marrying a young bozo, but initially playing with older guys.
    https://www.amazon.com/Lolita-Vintage-In…

    You can tell this 5 to 10% that want the older guy, because they dress outlandishly, avant-garde, where as the others dress trendy, conformist.

    Talk about the college lecture circuit here, not hard to invent a gimmick to put yourself on it.
    https://www.amazon.com/Zen-Effects-Watts…

    And some discussion of it here:
    https://www.amazon.com/Bonfire-Vanities-…

    SJG

    Kirill Petrenko conducts the final scene from LULU
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNJ9CyFO…
  • Mainster
    7 years ago
    Just some random musings on SA, since this discussion piqued my interest in the site.....With no real intention of partaking, I put a profile up on SA. The women most interesting to me are the forthright ones- "I want to be spoiled, NSA, let's discuss the options." The ones who seem to be hitting on me in the greatest volume want me to fund their lifestyle and never see them naked. I expect that is what most potential SDs experience. I'd consider replying to a few of the more stable-appearing women, but I think I'd rather keep the $80 "upgrade" fee and cram it in some deserving stripper's cleavage.

    A few seem to be first-rate nut cases, and most are just after your money, on about the same percentages you see at the clubs. The instance of drug use may be lower, but I'm sure it isn't eliminated. There probably isn't much difference between SS and SBS. I don't see myself contacting any of these women; OTC and escorts are a better option for me, from a financial standpoint. I can see where SA could be great resource if one is reasonably cautious, patient, and willing to do his due diligence. A recurring theme in the girls' profiles is "I decided to try SA because it's the safest way to meet a Daddy." Is that what they've heard, or do they have empirical knowledge to back that statement up?

    Bartenders are indeed pretty well-represented. Two bartenders whose profiles I checked have posted selfies taken where they work; one sure looked like the bar at Bourbon Street, the other may have been from the defunct Centerfolds, but both were understandably out of focus so I couldn't swear to it.
  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    @Mainster wrote: " The ones who seem to be hitting on me..."
    ------------------------
    You may find with experience that waiting for someone to hit on you is the wrong approach. I have my SA settings such that I'm invisible to everyone, unless I send a PM. Waiting for someone to hit on you is too passive IMHO, and those that contact you are more likely to be escorts or other time-wasters.

    @Mainster wrote: There probably isn't much difference between SS and SBS.
    ----------------------------------------------------
    I think that's not true and certainly not if you find the right girl. Strippers are notorious for being masters at manipulating men and dishing out massive amounts of bullshit. That's their job -- manipulating men. If you find the right college girl, you won't be dealing with SBS. That said, I'm trying it again with a 19-yr-old stripper I met in a no-contact club. Bracing myself for a load of stripper shit....

  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    Edit: If there is a common form of SBS, it's the young girls who are "toe-dipping" and don't really understand the reality that they are being paid to have sex with older guys. When the reality hits, they flake out and disappear.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    IME, there's such a broad swath of women on SA that you get very different experiences based on who you end up meeting any particular day.

    Stripper or ex-stripper? SS = SBS, exactly. Perhaps depressingly, even ex-strippers exhibit active-stripper-level SS, to some extent or other, especially in the area of reliability. Then again, that might be a self-selecting group of ex-strippers ... if they had their shit together, they wouldn't have had to be on SA in the first place.

    Civilian girl? SS != SBS

    Agree about the girls who don't quite get the "money for sex" (wink wink) quid pro quo here, there's a percentage of girls who don't get it. That said, I can't really call this SBS, because rather than being manipulative or flakey, all girls have been up front with me. Many basically just say they're not interested in sex on their profile, so I just pass them up. The rest have all brought it out in emails, so at least we were able to see we were incompatible early on. I have not had a single girl wait until the in-person meeting to drop this on me.
  • ThereAndBackAgain
    7 years ago
    So much wisdom in this thread:

    Second Executive Summary in quotes:
    shailynn : After all, it's a lot easier to convince a stripper into doing something that hasn't graduated high school than a SB that is in law school.

    subraman:

    yahtzee74 : I'd rather fuck a streetwalker than a "smart" educated woman who can't figure out how to make ends meet without fucking guys for money.

    MobyDick: Several social media platforms now use facial recognition AI algorithms to confirm accounts where they see suspicious behavior.

    subraman: some of these women will make more money than me after passing out.
  • ThereAndBackAgain
    7 years ago
    My 2 cents:

    A lot of the problem is no longer term commitment to the job of mistressing or reputational damage. They just need to get a new person every time. One of the best things that happened with online market is TER. Nobody can keep ripping for a long time.
    We need the same for mistressing.
    But sugaring is still so anonymized that you never know what you will land.

    100 years back every one in town knew a whore by her name and skills and got exactly what they wanted.

    ------
    Like others mentioned a civvie college student knows this is temporary and they may play it however they like especially with the anonymity.
  • ThereAndBackAgain
    7 years ago
    Even the children knew them whores
    https://youtu.be/_n2s5i2i2Jg

  • RandomMember
    7 years ago
    BTW @Subra, well-written thread.


    yahtzee74 : "I'd rather fuck a streetwalker than a "smart" educated woman who can't figure out how to make ends meet without fucking guys for money."
    --------------------------------------
    Huh? So you'd rather fuck an HIV-infested @Dugan crack whore than a good looking college student who's had two partners in her entire life? College room and board for 4 years can cost on the order of $250,000. How do you expect her to make ends meet? Work part-time in the library or school cafeteria? Should she work at Walmart? If she can have an arrangement with a clean, professional, guy who wants to help out, then why not?

    Better hope the Bernie Sanders and free-tuition doesn't happen in 2020. Then you can kiss goodbye all wonderful girls we have access to right now.
  • Mainster
    7 years ago
    @Random- begin mind that I'm not actually looking for a SB; I'm having a look at the site, doing my own "toe-dipping" and just watching girls pass by. My profile is about as nebulous and boring as I could make it, and it still got a dozen hits in as many hours. Don't intend to respond to them.

    Today's update.... I have responses from the Netherlands, South Africa, and Germany. I really seem to be pulling the Aryan chicks.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    Thanks RM...

    Okay, I think my summary might be, take a look at these 3 awesome attributes:

    1. As hot and sexy as a stripper
    2. As wild, impulsive, and fun to party with as a stripper
    3. As smart, mature, reliable, and self-aware as a well-educated well-raised civilian girl

    My experience on SA so far is: you can pick ANY TWO of the above attributes, and you'll find tons of girls who will match them. There may be some triple-threat unicorn girls out there, maybe that's what RM ran into, or maybe the many $3500+ guys are bogarting them all, but I have not run into one and I've done a lot of meets in the past year. Given I can pick 2 attributes, I've been picking 1&2.
  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    Subra, a girl who advertises on something like SA is not a civilian, no matter what she says.

    You can find what you want by cracking into some of the social realms surrounding colleges, the ones which involve adults.

    And Bernie Sanders and free college are the best things which could happen in this country. And that will not reduce the number of young women interested in relationships, at least for a while, with older guys.

    SJG

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_Havilla…
    can be on floats too. Fixed landing gear, twin turbo props.

    Notice high aspect ratio and complex flaps. Made for STOL, so it can carry a great deal of weight, but it flies slow for its power. Made on Victoria Island BC.

    Twin turbo prop flying boat, Lake
    http://www.bush-planes.com/Lake-amphibio…

    Sea Wind, 300 hp flying boat. Used to be kit, now certified
    http://www.seawind.net/index.html

    Best of Oshkosh
    http://www.popularmechanics.com/flight/a…

    ICON A5
    https://www.iconaircraft.com/home

    On trailer
    http://www.bing.com/images/search?view=d…

    Glasair Sportsman, can be on 2 or 3 wheels, or on floats. 180hp, or 210hp Continental. Need the extra power for floats and floats with wheels. Can be trailered

    http://www.fibertechcomposites.com/galle…

    For grass, best to take off wheel pants. But for off airport, 2 wheels best. Can have these huge tundra tires.
  • Roadworrier
    7 years ago
    I wandered onto SA a year ago and bagged it after a couple months. What I thought was interesting is you get some of the same gals on Tinder. After a while I just decided SC and OTC would get me more of the action I wanted, which has nothing to do with keeping a college gal in Louboutins. I don't even call it SD or SB. There are a large number of escorts on there. If you are going to do this, agree with the idea of keeping your profile private and just pick those you find interesting.
  • day_trader
    7 years ago
    1. Finding a classic sb on 1500/month maybe difficult, but not impossible. The hottest girls in your area might not be happy with that and quite possibly you would get outbid by higher spenders. However, most sb's would do pay per date in the beginning. For once a week meetings at say 300 your already at 1200 for the month. You could save quite a bit on hotels if you can do it at your place or hers. Every meet up doesn't have to entail a night out some where, maybe a couple of times out doing things and a couple of times per month staying in.

    2/4 I've ran into more then my fair share of flakiness on SA. I try and do a lot of filtering out over email so there is less flakiness later on. Over the first couple of emails I let them know what I'm looking for or I ask them what they are looking for. I tell or ask them in a respectful way and we continue talking depending on what their answer is. No one has bit my head off by asking early on.

    3. Yeah number three is so true. I met up with this Latina chick a couple of months ago for a meet and greet, she looked so feminine in her photos, nice looking and sporting a single piece mini. Her pics were real. She looked more like a ghetto type of chick in person, not my cup of tea.

    5. I haven't ran into too many strippers but that may have a lot to do with that I'm in a smallish area. I did recognize one but I didn't initiate a conversation with her, a buddy of mine fucked her for a ride and some weed one time, lol.

  • PrimetimeSchein
    7 years ago
    The knowledge on this thread is top tier. Thanks to the OGs for laying some critical foundation pieces for us younger guys. By me living in a very populated area in the Midwest and being an hour away from two Major universities I think this is something I will investigate into.
  • joc13
    7 years ago
    Thanks Subraman. Great article. My own recent journey is nearing a conclusion with article pending.
  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    Interesting perspectives, Roadworrier and day_trader. At this point, definitely not surprised that there's a lot of overlap in the experiences we're all having. joc, looking forward to your article! And thanks BigTezzy, let us know how it goes
  • yahtzee74
    7 years ago
    I think you need to consider Subraman's location, San Francisco, for what his experience has been compared to what you can expect in the rest of the country. I've seen people write that SF is the worst place for men seeking women because their are so many wealthy men in the area versus the number of single women.

    For example there is this thread from Reddit comparing SF vs NYC for a sugar daddy.
    https://www.reddit.com/r/sugarlifestylef…

    There is also this article about a sugar baby who did poorly in Florida, Chicago and New York but is doing well in San Francisco.
    https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/dp5pz…

  • Subraman
    7 years ago
    Just like strip club experiences vary widely between areas and cities, I'm certain you're right that SA experiences also vary wildly, and being in this particular areas has to tilt things a certain way. Like I said, I do know the $3000+/month crew is having a pretty easy and fun time of it out here, it's the rest of us who are less-than-satisifed with the experience...
  • LecherousMonk
    7 years ago
    LOL at paying SB's monthly allowances. In my market the standard is 200 roses per meet.
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