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Lessons Learned by a Newbie

I am a middle aged male who never previously went to a strip club because of the wife, but am now going through a divorce and decided to go.

Lessons Learned:

1. Stripper quality varies due to experience and skill. You may end up with a cute stripper with a great face and hair, nice body, but can't dance worth a shit. Thank her for the dance, tip her, but don't get mad. Tell her you are not interested next time she asks if you want to dance.

2. Even if you want to tell your stripper you are not interested (due to poor performance the last time), your ego can get in the way of making good decisions. I went back for a second night and 2 girls who I met the other night were greeting at the entrance next to security. They remembered my name which inflated my ego greatly. They then proceeded to tell the security guy that they better "search" me for contraband, which they did at the same time. Followed by hugs and the asking for the first dance. Of course I said yes, even though it was the bad dancer. Obviously her experience did not improve over the course of a few days.

3. Some dancers will overcharge for the 2 for 1 deals. There was no need to overcharge, as I always tipped well. Other dancers did not overcharge in the 2 for 1. A thoughtful girl will charge the correct price for services rendered.

4. Lighting can be poor in the private rooms. I forgot I had a $100 in my wallet and accidentally gave her $120 instead of $40. They will use slight of hand to hide the larger bill when they can. Even when asked, they will lie. Alcohol and dim lighting can affect your ability to see and your thought process. A thoughtful girl will alert the customer to his mistake.

5. Sometimes less attractive girls will "try harder". This can make for a better experience than with a more attractive girl who doesn't do as much. This can also mean violating certain guidelines, etc. A less attractive girl was the first to take off my polo shirt, etc. I think most will get the drift.

6. Some dancers will start a private dance in the middle of a song or even near the ending, and charge you for 2 dances when she should not have started until the song begins. This is done deliberately. A thoughtful girl always waits.

7. Some girls will get the most expensive drink they have at the bar. A thoughtful girl will ask what I am having, and follow my lead. If she only drinks a certain drink and it is expensive, it would be nice of her to ask, especially when she sees I am ordering well drinks (which by the way were full of alcohol and not watered down).

8. Be aware of your alcohol consumption. Take a cab if you are not sober enough to drive. If you think ahead of time, take your lawyer's business card with you and a business card or two of the local cab companies. It never hurts to be prepared.

9. Some dancers will proposition you for sexual acts. Don't be afraid to say no.

10. Some dancers will give you their pity story in an attempt for more money from dances, or just in hopes you will give them money. Don't be afraid to say no.

11. Some dancers will be high or drunk. Sometimes this will result in a poor dance, or sometimes it will result in your best dance of the night, especially if they are into it.

12. You will get pressured for extras, such as VIP Room or Shower Dances. Don't be afraid to say no. You will find that quoted prices for the Shower Dances can vary, even greatly vary.

13. Everybody lies - strippers and customers. When you realize the lie, ignore it
and move on. Don't point out the discrepancies.

14. Couples do come to the clubs, and the wives of the customers can be hot too. When she kisses the stripper at the tip line or does other things, feel free to look. For me it was the first time I saw two women passionately kiss in person. It was definitely cool.

Tips:

1. Shower and shampoo, get a shave and a haircut just prior to going. Put on a good cologne and deodorant. Dress to impress. It will result in better service.

2. Wear dark shorts and a button-down shirt of comfort and easy access (weather permitting).

3. Leave the cell phone and any weapons at home or in the car. You will be searched upon entering the club.

4. If they have valet parking, ask if you can self-park. Most of the time they have an area for that which is only a few feet from the valet parking.

5. Tip your waitress well and your stripper well. Most of the time you will reap the rewards. Good money management is key to having an enjoyable night.

6. Don't forget to you are there to have a good time. Enjoy yourself.

17 comments

  • 3LeggedMan
    12 years ago
    Lesson 9a. If you're inclined to say 'yes' to an offer of extras, have protection!

    Tip 5a. In some clubs, tipping the bouncer/floor manager can help you to acquire a girl who meets your particular needs.
  • TortillaChip
    12 years ago
    1. Why would you tip for a bad dance? The dancer has no incentive to improve.

  • cnyknight
    12 years ago
    is there such a thing as a "thoughtful" dancer?
  • NotSteve
    12 years ago
    A thoughtful dancer thinks of the best interests of both herself and the customer. There are differences in dancers. Some just care for themselves, others try to make it a mutually enjoyable experience by giving the customer the best experience for his money. This is accomplished by doing the few things I mentioned above. I don't forget those who do me right, and I don't forget those who do me wrong.

    In answer above, I tend to tip for a bad dance if they are at least trying. If obviously they don't give a damn and aren't trying, there is no incentive to tip. I just think tipping is the right thing to do in most cases. Also, I believe right or wrongly that word will get around that I am not afraid to tip, which will at a minimum get you more company, which may help when the club is crowded.
  • motorhead
    12 years ago
    "3. Leave the cell phone and any weapons at home or in the car. You will be searched upon entering the club."

    Bullshit. I bring my Tec-9 wherever I go. Won't leave home without it.
  • Alucard
    12 years ago
    I have yet to go to any club that has " searched" me. But I'm not fucking stupid enough to take a gun with me.
  • Chaplin
    12 years ago
    I can say as a former dancer this is for the most part true. I'd like to think of myself as a thoughtful stripper
  • Player11
    12 years ago
    9b When taking extras it helps to negotiate before hand. Never take extras if you don't know what the price is (I have done them ITC for $100-$300 here in Houston). If your unsure if you will want extras with a girl your taking to VIP just start with a couple of dances first and see if there is chemistry. Don't afraid to say no if the price is too high or bad vibes from the girl. You can just say (using their same ss) "I like to get to know a girl first before I play." I use Trojan (thin) large size condoms and always have a couple with me when entering a SC. If you take viagra take it about an half hr or hour before going to the club on an empty stomach. Warning: It will make you very horny and vulnerable to extras proposals but strippers will be impressed with your rock hard dick. Many stripper believes viagra increases penis size and this is why they may ask if you take it. Strippers love big dicks and the idea of shopping money and some strange dick is a jumbo package many of then can't resist especially at some of the extras clubs here in Houston. At one Houston club where I am VIP I can lay the girl down on the couch and fuck her silly.
  • Player11
    12 years ago
    6a I have found many dancers to be very thoughtful. I remember taking one to the upstairs VIP to fuck. We were almost there when she called (hubby?) about little Bobby's bedtime n stuff giving him instructions and ending with "Love you honey, will be home from work about midnight." You would think she was calling from her office.

    As soon as the brief call was over smiling, she started fondling my already hard dick, and motioned over to a dark couch area "lets go have some fun." She fucked me CG style and it was great. Had to use condom though as she said "Trojans allways, I am married" she smiled.
  • Player11
    12 years ago
    5b Watch out for heavy girls especially if they have a big fat ass. Some of them are really too lazy to give good dances and want to sit on or bounce up and down on Mr H. This can lead to a sore dick but don't panic and go to doctor next day. It should abate in around a week. Just be careful. Nothing like a girl built like a Defensive Tackle bouncing up and down on your dick. Not good - don't be afraid to set her straight and give her some coaching on how she should really handle Mr H.
  • Player11
    12 years ago
    11a Drunk dancers your take to VIP can mean bareback opportunity sometimes for free. Drive carefully and enter with caution. You don't know where they have really been. Chances are, they won't remember you after the experience if you try to "remind" them the next time your in the club. I would suggest you stay mum in the event you got them preggers.
  • carolynne
    12 years ago
    i have always found that treating the customers with respect is the best way to get tips and repeat business! duh!
  • Player11
    12 years ago
    I spend more on strippers who are respectful and have class. Gals who are impatient to drain my money get none of it.
  • OralJakes
    12 years ago
    Well written and yes there are thoughtful dancers. One of the regular clubs I have been visiting has two for one dance days (2 dances for $20). I was getting a private dance from one of the nicer gals there towards closing time one night and the dj decided to end the night at 1:30 am instead of closer to 2:00 am. This was at the end of our first song. She apologized and offered to give back $10 instead of the $20... i said keep it. The next time I went and had a private dance, she gave me a free dance because of what happened last time. Then again there are girls in the same club who given the opportunity will take you for all what you came in with, if they do then it is your fault.
  • dw.buck
    12 years ago
    plenty of thoughtful dancer out there there thoughtful of the money u giving them
  • georgmicrodong
    12 years ago
    "3. Leave the cell phone and any weapons at home or in the car. You will be searched upon entering the club."

    I've never been searched. The one time the doorman wanted to search me, I left without allowing it.

    As for the gun, in most places, carrying a gun into a place that serves alcohol, if you live in a place where clubs serve it, is illegal.
  • SketchinGuy
    11 years ago
    Interesting responses. Even with my experiences I learned a couple things here. One thing I'd add on being thoughtful is don't wear a belt with a large buckle. When your dancer does her thing, the edges or corners of the buckle can make it uncomfortable for both of you.
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