Why do I do this?

Great post!  I can't seem to shake the habit either even though I have a beautiful, loving wife and my first child due in about 6 months.  For me, I love the feeling I get when I walk in and enter this fantasy world where I can escape the demands of "real" life for a few hours.

The feminists have tried to block the truth of this reality. Every man needs a wife, whom he respects, and a mistress that fulfills the needs that a wife won't fill. Until the 1960's, every American city had a bordello that operated in the open. The reason they existed is because of a reality confirmed recently by scientists-it works like this:<br />
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A woman only has so much affection. If she has kids, she's &quot;affectioned out&quot; by the time hubby gets home from work. She's not interested in cuddling because she's been doing that with the kids. Hubby is shit out of luck, unless he's got some harmless fun on the side. It shouldn't affect his family life, unless the mistress/club becomes an addiction (takes over his life). <br />
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Europe remains in reality about this, the US is in denial.<br />
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In my own case, my mom got a boyfriend when I was seven (dad left the year before). Mom froze us out in favor of her boyfriend. <br />
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So, Rick, see the girls, just don't spend too much time with them. Balance the club and your family and it actually leads to a better home life (if there is a balance).

Frightening, rick, truly and absolutely frightening.<br />
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The only difference is that I don't just suspect that I'm broken, I <b>know</b> it.&nbsp;<img src="/editor/images/smiley/msn/regular_smile.gif" alt="" /><br type="_moz" />

&nbsp;Yes, we have some inner drive that keeps us coming back for more.&nbsp; The hunt, the chase, the score, it's all part of the rush.&nbsp; The mix can be different depending on moods. Sometimes it's the faux affection, sometimes it's the flirting, but mostly it's the lusting that's not limited to window shopping--after all most of us guys hate to shop, we like to buy, right?.

Great Article.&nbsp; Dudester as usual hits the nail on the head.&nbsp; My only regret about the hobby is I wish I had taken it up years before.&nbsp; I don't believe a guy is &quot;damaged&quot; because he likes strip clubs or seeing strippers.&nbsp; Its like a pilot who would rather fly jets than&nbsp; the same old boring prop job.<br />
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My major challenge has been budget management - allocating how much to Projects (strippers) and how much to investments.&nbsp; My advice to anyone is keep the SC hobby off the radar of any GF or wife and don't discuss it with civilians.&nbsp; Keep it need to know.&nbsp; One should not sacrifice family, job, or financial security for strippers.&nbsp; Strippers and the advent of internet escorts (backpage.com, eros, etc.) has essentially replaced the bordellos of the 1950's.&nbsp; While not all strippers do extras, many of them do and irregardless all of them are sex workers.&nbsp; Every girl you will meet at a SC is different both in appeal and performance (and what she will do&nbsp;for you extras wise) &nbsp;but it does not take much effort to find ones that are a good fit for your agenda;&nbsp; its all just a matter of money.&nbsp; I have found the shopping around a real fun part!<br />

I have skeletons in my past &amp; in my closet that lead me to going to Strip Clubs a great deal. I acknowledge it. In my case I'm a bachelor for life &amp; don't have to concern myself with the hurting of a wife or children or parents (Both dead). Now some people may be offended by my next statement or say I'm being two faced, but my feeling is DO NOT get MARRIED if you wish to screw around &amp; Fuck or get BJs from Strippers or any other female willing to do it with you. It saves you a lot of possible trouble down the line. That's just HOW I feel. But Men will do what they wish &amp; that is their private business, NOT mine.<br type="_moz" />

Gentlemen, the answer to the question is that we are addicted to sex.&nbsp; Just as an alcoholic or drug addict.&nbsp; And the addiction varies in degree and form for each of us.&nbsp; We have strong urges to go to the club to experience the ladies in a variety of way.&nbsp; Just like alcohol and drugs, SCs are a place where we can escape real life for a while.&nbsp; And like an addiction, we always want more.&nbsp;<br />
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So...to join my 12 step support group for SC addicts, meet me at the local strip club this weekend for group therapy :)<br type="_moz" />

Don't be so hard on yourself, Rick. The reason you do it is pretty obvious. It's because you are a rich, stud who also happens to like to help out the girls by a) allowing them to be fucked by your studly self, and b) giving them a little bit of your vast amounts of money (so much that the few hundred you give won't even be noticed). All they need to do in return is acknowledge the rich stud that you are. A pretty obvious thing, so shouldn't be a big deal for them to do so, anyway, right? Sainthood surely awaits you.

My name is Skeets, and I have been addicted to strip clubs since 1983...<br />
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Well, not addicted, but I do enjoy them.<br />
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First, any man who does not like to have naked women pay attention to them is, likely, gay...so, they would have no need to go to a club.<br />
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Now, I am not too addicted, maybe a couple of trip a month during the summer, then maybe every six weeks during the winter when I am busier (hell, once I went three years without going!).&nbsp; But, I have never felt the desire to get take out, it has been offered and I have even partaken a few times, but for me this is just a harmless distraction.<br />
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When I was married I went less and never took out, but in a club I can be a little more free, not worry about being quite so professional as I have to be at work.<br />
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But, if you are unable to stop, or are risking screwing up a good family thing, you might be in a position that it is time to walk away.<br type="_moz" />

rick -<br />
For what it's worth, you are obviously far from alone. There are many of us out here that share your same obsession. I'm pretty much the female version of you - I also have a great &quot;wife&quot; and all of the other fixin's that make&nbsp; what society deems a happy life (in between my attempts to destroy the world, of course, as a radical feminist according to Doofster - LMFAO at the stupidity!). And I, like you, enjoy the hunt &amp; chase within the walls of an SC, &amp; OTC as well. <br />
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Damaged? Nah. Fuck that. I gave up long ago trying to analyze this hobby that drives us - just go do what you do. Life's too short to sweat this kind of stuff - run with it &amp; enjoy!<br type="_moz" />

Thanks all and I obviously posted this in the right place.&nbsp; I think that the Jack I was imbibing that night&nbsp;contributed to my maudlin moment of introspection, but in seeing the responses&nbsp;I am very glad that I posted it.<br />
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Lopaw, thank you and I couldn't agree more.&nbsp; Also, from what little you've hinted at in your posts I suspect that you are indeed the female version of me, except with a better game and much more stealth.&nbsp; I&nbsp;look forward to the day when, with a Jack in&nbsp;hand and&nbsp;while munching on popcorn, at least in between drooling moments, you have a momentary lapse of discretion and I get to read&nbsp;some of the &quot;Exploits of Lopaw.&quot;&nbsp;&nbsp;;)<br />
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Dougster, you nailed it!&nbsp; Saint Rick, the benefactor of single stripper mothers and other strippers&nbsp;desperate for&nbsp;cash.&nbsp;&nbsp;Money,&nbsp;oral exploration, the good fortune to be fucked by me - you are right,&nbsp;my giving never stops ;)&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Obviously the IGNORE button doesn't work for article posts, but in&nbsp;one of your rare moments&nbsp;of lucidity you really shined :)<br />
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Skeet, thanks, but walk away?!&nbsp;&nbsp;Please see tha article above - LOL.<br />
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Thanks again everyone!&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />
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Much of the world (America in particular) is very naive when it comes to sex.&nbsp; Men are genetically programmed to reproduce with many women.&nbsp; Women are programmed to nest and to attract strong and secure men.&nbsp; It doesn't mean we can't control these urges but to deny they exist is foolhardy.<br />
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To be around naked women is tremendously exciting for men.&nbsp; I guess some men can control these urges better than I because going to strip clubs is still looked down upon by most.&nbsp; Perhaps, a lot of men aren't aware of what is available today in SC's and, if they did, might be tempted more.<br />
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There have been long periods in my life where I was not tempted and was satisfied by my SO.&nbsp; As I've grown older, the availability and excitement of having young, ripe women to fondle and play with creates a pretty intense desire.&nbsp; Maybe once one has tasted the forbidden fruit it's too late.<br />
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<input type="hidden" id="gwProxy"><!--Session data--></input><input type="hidden" id="jsProxy" onclick="jsCall();" />I agree with most of what's shared here, but with one distinction; I do not get a thrill from the &quot;chase,&quot;&nbsp; which ironically, is why I enjoy SCs. I'm a good looking, middle-aged, and financially sound single guy - think Tom Hanks with less money. Historically though, I've never been a classic alpha-male who enjoys working my game on women in bars. I don't like it the phoniness and even if I did fool a girl with fabricated swagger, banter and jokes, I wouldn't want her for any kind of relationship because I'd feel I'd&nbsp; gotten her under false pretenses and I wouldn't respect her for falling for that crap.<br />
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In an SC, all that goes away. Everything's up front. Both patrons and dancers are there for the same reason; generosity counts; and rewards are to be had by being a pleasant, honest, and authentically interesting man (same for the woman, as well). On that last point, I think there's even more to be gained by being a gentleman because one can stand apart from all that macho bravado and hustle that can occur in SCs. And at my usual clubs, the girls know I'm interesting, I'm generous (buying drinks, getting lap dances, and tipping), and I'm respectful, often connecting with them at a deeper level, more as the women they are than what the illusion suggests.<br />
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So, I feel like I'm rewarded in an SC for the the &quot;real&quot; me, whereas in the outside world, I'm usually wearing some kind of game-face or posturing in some way to cope with the people I normally encounter, including those at work, at single's groups, and in public service contexts (stores, and the like). This is in part, because our American, Judeo-Christian society imposes artificial controls on what is supposedly acceptable behavior - e.g., nudity is bad (and I'm a nudist, which is why I feel a similar sense of relaxation and acceptance similar to SCs at nudist resorts), sex for hire is bad (which in part leads to all the games guys play to get sex), alcohol/drugs are bad (which is why I can't buy wine on Sundays), sexual variety is bad (which is why marriage has become an institution, and we all know how well that works), and on it goes.<br />
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In summary, I'm &quot;hooked&quot; on SCs because they afford one of the few places I can go to experience something that truly brings me pleasure (which may have a genetic/evolutionary hard-wired component, as has been discussed elsewhere), where I can totally relax and be myself. It's an &quot;escape,&quot; sure, but one partly borne of the repressive culture in which we live. I don't think it's necessarily a reflection of something inside that's &quot;broken.&quot; Rather, it's at least as much something on the outside, because it doesn't have to be this way. In many parts of Europe, a man can soak up rays on the beach or in a park while nude and nobody cares. Equally, he can visit an FKK or cruise a red light district with impunity. In&nbsp; some cultures and in some periods of our past, a man could have his wife and his concubines, and nobody would raise an eyebrow.<br />
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Thanks for the excuse to go philosphical. I like Drippy's suggestion to hit a local SC at our earliest opportunity to discuss this &quot;problem&quot; we all seem to have.<br />
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<span style="font-size: small">Rod nailed it, especially 1st sentence in 4th paragraph- &quot;experience something that truly brings me pleasure&quot;.&nbsp; Compare how much money <b>and</b> time we/ I/ you spend on clubbing with other activities ( yours and others), be it golf, fishing, hunting, marathon running, scuba diving, restoring cars, gardening, basket weaving, whatever.&nbsp; People would not be doing those things if they didn't derive some pleasure ( or sense of accomplishment from it).</span>

Rick thanks for the post from the past man.....I agree and conect with you 200%

Awesome post. I really agrree and I have asked many of the same questions. I once asked a good friend of mine who is a psychologist. Very experienced. How prevalent is cheating? He said without hesitation. "it is my business, it runs about 80% of marriages". He even did not disagree with it. "just don't fall in love, in an affair that is a mistake."

Hmmm, sounds like a strip club adventure.

Rod nailed it for sure