DATY...

Stupid Old Man: “Do you really what to go down on some chick that you have just met?”
Parodyman-->: If I met her loitering among the bottom feeding whores at your favorite SC club then the answer would be, “Fuck no! I’m not into creampie…”


Stupid Old Man: “I don't Where has that pussy been?”
Parodyman-->: I bet you don’t where your Grammar Primer is at either.


Stupid Old Man: “I recently asked my favorite dancer if I could kiss her(pussy),”
Parodyman-->: Did she say, “Daddy, no.” Then bolt from the VIP area?


Stupid Old Man: “When we were alone, she pulled the thong aside and let me lick it.”
Parodyman-->: Wow she really is a slut. Of course incest is the norm in that area.


Stupid Old Man: “It tasted and smelled normal.”
Parodyman-->: Like home cooking?


Stupid Old Man: “She giggled the whole time.”
Parodyman-->: You were probably licking the wrong hole.


Stupid Old Man: “She said I don't,normally do that and added that she knowes that I am selective.”
Parodyman-->: She is lying. She also knows that you can’t spell. And as far as being “selective” we all know that you are a discriminating connoisseur of bargain basement pussy.


Stupid Old Man: “Yes I AM GOING TO take her flowers next week.”
Parodyman-->: You might want to cough up some of that child support you probably missed out on when she was growing up.

Parodyman; The rules of engagement call for a second. I could bring my son (30yo) My son in law(28yo) My 31 Yo old daughter( who has read your shit and would bitch slap the shit out of you but I would prefer to bring a life time older buddy. He would only have to record the results and post them here. Maybe you could bring your mom to caress your balding head. At 66, I still have a full head of hair, as one dancer put it. I have the chest of an 18 yo. I have to show my ID to get a senior citizens discount. I am stronger than my sons but do not have their stamina. Better get your shots in early or shut the fuck up.

Are you on drugs?

Stupid Old Man: “Parodyman; The rules of engagement call for a second.”
Parodyman-->: A second what? Are you talking about a duel? Not only are you giving away your age but your southern pride is showing.

Stupid Old Man: “I could bring my son (30yo) My son in law(28yo) My 31 Yo old daughter( who has read your shit and would bitch slap the shit out of you but I would prefer to bring a life time older buddy.”
Parodyman-->: Bring Michael Jackson for all I care. As I do not frequent glory holes I doubt I will ever see you.

Stupid Old Man: “He would only have to record the results and post them here.”
Parodyman-->: What results? Are your children taking paternity tests in the hopes that they can call the mailman daddy?

Stupid Old Man: “Maybe you could bring your mom to caress your balding head.”
Parodyman-->: What makes you think I’m losing my hair?

Stupid Old Man: “At 66, I still have a full head of hair, as one dancer put it.”
Parodyman-->: Was she laughing when she said this?

Stupid Old Man: “I have the chest of an 18 yo.”
Parodyman-->: An 18 year old pansy? Or is it more of a sunken old man’s chest. I bet you wheeze when you breathe.

Stupid Old Man: “I have to show my ID to get a senior citizens discount.”
Parodyman-->: For lap dances?

Stupid Old Man: “I am stronger than my sons but do not have their stamina.”
Parodyman-->: Will you stop with the incest talk please.

Stupid Old Man: “Better get your shots in early or shut the fuck up.”
Parodyman-->: What the fuck are you talking about? Do you honestly at your advanced age want to embarrass yourself by getting into a fist fight?

Shadowcat is currently the reason I have a hard time respecting someone just because they are older. You have to show me something worthy of respect. Shadowcat will never amount to anything more than a pathetic old clown.

hhmm...you would go down a dancer as long as you haven't seen another customer going down on her? thats quite a safety net. right!! I would never DATY a dancer because I don't want some sort of outbreak on my face. Its possible it could happen. Just not worth it. A dancer I know who has HSV 2 and offers lots of extras, I'm sure DATY amongst them, was enough to convince me that it's not worth the risk.

I was drunk. She offered. She claimed that she came. I don't remember and don't care, because I shouldn't have engaged in such reckless and potentially disease ridden behavior.

HSV-2 is very hard to catch on your mouth.

HSV-1 is more likely, but once you reach a certain age it is very likely you already have it anyway (80% of the population does).

OTOH, if you do have HSV-1 you might be concerned about spreading it to her although this is she is allowing DATY with customers it's likely just a matter of time until she gets it from someone.

(Remember one of our golden rules of strippers: no matter what she says or how special you feel you are, what she does for you she is certainly doing with many others).

Once a dancer had me DATY while she was on stage. It was only a topless place, so she moved the front of the thong to one side. It was crowded that day, so I was a bit self-conscious about doing it. I stopped after only about 10 seconds and she grabbed the back of my head: "I didn't say stop!"

That was a truly unique occurrence!

I used to DATY all the time, and often had the favor returned. But afterwards, any time my tongue would tingle or I got a cold sore I'd freak out and kick myself for having done it. Also the thought of possibly bringing home some uninvited STD to my SO was a sobering thought (not to mention the thought of other people probably "dining" ahead of me - UGH.)
Nowadays my tongue stays in my mouth. Mostly.

I've done lots of DATY at the MSC in SF. In LA, it's a lot harder to arrange.