Daddy Issues?

Recently at a clean club. Really hot chick, decided to shoot my shot anyway, I ask about a menu. She’s responds, “Can’t do it here, but I’ll tell you what: Why don’t you meet me out back by the dumpster”

I began to nod intently and rub my hands together. Oh yeah I know exactly what that means, I thought to myself, ofcourse I would get access to the secret menu, the black market because that’s just the level of monger I really am, an absolute bad-ass.

I walk out back, open the door and out by the dumpster I see a big bonfire. Multiple strippers encircling it, sitting Indian style, singing Cats in a Cradle on a loop, again and again and again. I close the door. I never did return to that strip club, and likely never will.