Anybody else miss the glitter days?

avatar for Muddy
Muddy
USA
When strippers would be drenched in a sea of glitter. I would hug my favorite stripper and have it on me so thick that no matter how much I rubbed I couldn't get it off me. After leaving the club was always an adventure. Well I actually enjoyed those days...thoroughly.

I would strut down the street, shine and sparkle. Do it a little twist, a little sugar shake, a little boogie bake, glow and glimmer. I was shooting star...personified.

I would jump up on the podium, extend my arms and yell "CHA!" And all the townsfolk would flee in terror at how sexy I was, I would glow like the sun.

The children in the neighborhood would hem and haw. Laugh hysterically at me, call me faggot of the century. Me, in response, hands and voice shaking, tears streaming down for the face would answer: "Well this, this, this fag's got sheen, this..*deep breath*...this fag's got gleen" I told them off. I sure showed them. (They were 7, they were 7)

Oh how I missed those days.

23 comments

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avatar for IWantHerOnMe
IWantHerOnMe
2 months ago
Some guys don't want to have to explain random glitter to their wife.
avatar for misterorange
misterorange
2 months ago
^^ Some guys just want to spoil a good joke. Asshole.
avatar for drewcareypnw
drewcareypnw
2 months ago
Nope. One time I woke up after a night out at the clubs, looked across the bed, and MY WIFE had somehow gotten 1 piece of stripper glitter on her just from sleeping next to me. There's a herpes metaphor in there somewhere...
avatar for TheeOSU
TheeOSU
2 months ago
Muddy, don't give up! You can bring those days back again!



avatar for mogul1985
mogul1985
2 months ago
Man or Man! I needed this! Most Excellent. This would be a most bodacious day at a strip club!
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
2 months ago
I would take a stripper covered in glitter over what I see a lot of now, which is strippers covered in crappy tattoos.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 months ago
Muddy, you're a very disturbed individual. Just sayin. 😁
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
2 months ago
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 months ago
@Motor: Way to keep this site young and relevant with a Stairway to Heaven reference. This title was my prom theme back in the late 80s and it was old even then, lol.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
2 months ago
It was my prom theme too in 1977 and it was 5 or 6 years old then

Wonder what year it finally disappeared as a prom theme
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
2 months ago
When Muddy wears glitter:
"Instead of a Dark Lord, you would have a queen, not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! Tempestuous as the sea, and stronger than the foundations of the earth! All shall love me and despair!" - J.R.R. Tolkien
avatar for Icey
Icey
2 months ago
I liked the whole glitter look
avatar for TheeOSU
TheeOSU
2 months ago
^

Sure dougie, wearing glitter probably cheered you up when you were thinking of killing yourself because your crack whore gf left you for a bigger lowlife than you. Lulz
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
2 months ago
Glad that glitter is still a thing with some of the girls...
avatar for chiefwiggum
chiefwiggum
2 months ago
NFW, that glitter shit is everywhere
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
2 months ago
The solution to your word is simple, Muddy! Simply bring your own tube of multicolored glitter along with a container of corn syrup to act as an adhesive. You can then pour the syrup and glitter over both you and the dancer! I'm sure that she'll thank you for it!😜😂
avatar for Manuellabore
Manuellabore
2 months ago
The guy who invented Just for Men probably next invented glitter just to expand the market for the hair dye. Glitter is just ineradicable. It turns up in the the most inconvenient places at the most inopportune time, and it is impossible to explain in your car or on your body or clothes unless you have a preschooler in your immediate family. I had the bad taste and judgment to pick up a batch of green glitter roses for an OTC meetup 8 months ago and I'm still vacuuming that shit up. If I ever have the misfortune to to do a lap dance with a beglitterd dancer, I'll probably have to check myself into a 30 day rehab just to cleanse myself of the glitter before the SO sees me
avatar for ClubFan81077
ClubFan81077
2 months ago
I think the most abundant elements in the universe are:

1. Hydrogen
2. Helium
3. Glitter

Hasn't glitter been around since the big bang? :)
avatar for elmer
elmer
2 months ago
Oh yeah I miss those days leaving the club covered in glitter stopping at Taco Bell on the way home to change clothes trying in vain to wash off the smoke smell before going home

PSA give glitter covered greeting cards to the SO that shit never goes away
Busted with a speck or two of glitter.. must have been from that GD card
avatar for Studme53
Studme53
2 months ago
When I get nostalgic I just go to Hobby Lobby and pour a tube of glitter down my pants
avatar for misterorange
misterorange
2 months ago
^^ Lol
avatar for Jacks4thson
Jacks4thson
2 months ago
My experience was with spray tan about 7 years ago. A lovely tanned all over blond crawled all over me in a club. Went back to the hotel, slept and got up to shower for work. Washed my face and thought “what is all this brown shit washing off my face?”. Checked the clothes I had been wearing and no glitter but shirt and slacks just coated with brown spray tan. Sent that shit right to the laundry.

Now I know how she had such a great tan in December!
avatar for Lurker-X
Lurker-X
2 months ago
@elmer - luckily I don’t have to hide my strip club habit from my wife because she knows I indulge, but for those that do the PSA about the greeting card is brilliant.

Or at least it would be if glitter was still a big thing. I don’t think I’ve encountered it on a dancer in quite some time.
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