Dancer confiding in you she's about to get evicted, what would you do?
I remember several years ago, I got 2 or 3 dances from a nice looking dancer. Then she sat with me and started talking. She talked about "there's not enough money here tonight." I need a few hundred dollars or I'll be out on the street tomorrow because my landlord told me I had that long before he kicked me out. She didn't know what to do. I was out of town and just visiting so I just sat there and didn't say much. What would you have done? Offer to give her money but get sex out of it? Actually being a guy, that thought did cross my mind momentarily but then I thought 4 or 500 hundred dollars? No way. Plus it sounds like you're trying to make her into a prostitute. I guess she may have been out on the street shortly afterwards though. Or do you think she was trying a scam?
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However, I'm sure the contrary point of view among some dancers is that a bunch of men can be manipulated by sob stories and other sorts of lies, and that approach improves the cash flow. I just can't see it as a long term recipe for fulfilling life's aspirations and enjoying life after 40.
This may sound calloused but, maybe the "sob story" tellers should plan ahead better and prevent that situation from happening in the first place. That is, of course, if thier storey is a true one.
Either way, I don't care.
Sometimes on line I still whine, and I'm kind of up in the air about whether or not that's a good plan. I still do it because I "get started and can't help myself," and then after the fact sometimes I realize, "Hmm, I shoulda just sucked it up and accepted responsibility for my own disasters." But sometimes I think, "No, online it's fine to whine. That's your therapy, you're allowed a little indulgence, as long as you realize it's not reality. The 'talking cure' might be useful." So, I don't know exactly where I stand about whether or not online is a good place to air grievances in a self-pitying manner.
But I do know, that because I do air grievances online, therefore my online and offline selves are rather different. I really do believe in finding out what you can do differently next time and going ahead and doing it. You need to think about "what I did wrong" and also "what other people did wrong TO me," but you need to just think about it in terms of identifying the culprit(s), learning from the experience, and then getting a better result next time.
Doesn't sound to me like that's what's going on here at all. She'll do it again. So will he.
It works just as well for dancers. If I'm sitting with a dancer who's happy with her life, maybe she's in school or just happy partying or whatever, it makes *me* feel good too... her success creates a positive vibe I pick up on, I enjoy her company, and she makes more money. The converse, some loser complaining about her fucked-up life, worthless boyfriend, financial woes or whatever is just a huge turnoff.
So what would I say if she said she was being evicted? "Wow, that sucks. Well, I don't want to keep you then, guess you better make the rounds and try to get some dances." Then I'd find a girl who's having fun. Pretty simple.
O.
Losers don't NECESSARILY attract losers; but given that the winners are pro-actively (though maybe not deliberately) moving toward one another, what's left is a sea of unattached losers looking for attachment to someone that's available ...