A Bones Wedding? Hmmmm.

avatar for ClevelandTom
ClevelandTom
Ohio
Okay, Bones started all of this with his "Have you ever considered marrying a dancer?" thread and then mentioning how he is close to going over the deep end for the 42-year old spinner from Columbus.

This begs me to ask. . . what would a Bones wedding be like if he married his current Columbus favorite? I guess I am more interested in what the reception would be like, especially considering it would probably have to be held at the PP in South Carolina.

Have at it boys (and girls of course). Throw out your observations.

My thought. . .

With the brides side being heavy in dancers and Bones side being either dancers or TUSCL members, I'm sure there is going to have to be a VIP room where $5 dances are available.

Red Bull will be served instead of champagne.

The bridesmaids won't wear dresses. . . it'll be more like a bikini top and a thong.

Cash bar. $2 beer for the guys but the drinks for the girls will run $8.

I am eagerly awaiting the other observations of the board.

12 comments

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avatar for trojangreg
trojangreg
17 years ago
All ushers and his best man would get Viagra as a gift from the groom.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
17 years ago
I will be his best man but I will no longer share my favorite dancers with him. Dumb ass broke the code.
avatar for evilcyn
evilcyn
17 years ago
The chicken dance would be replaced by 2 for 1 specials..

The Bride would slide down a pole instead of walk down thee isle.

avatar for FONDL
FONDL
17 years ago
Insted of the groom throwing the bride's garter, the men would all stuff dollar bills in it.

Instead of a band, there's be an obnoxious DJ. And the music would be too loud.

There'd be ugly bouncers making sure the guys kept their hands at their sides while dancing.
avatar for ThisOldManPlayed1
ThisOldManPlayed1
17 years ago
"mentioning how he is close to going over the deep end for the 42-year old spinner from Columbus" - close to her, yes, can't get any closer, but deep end???? I seriously doubt that would ever occur! There's still too much strange out there I've haven't tasted yet!!! Kid in a candy store environment..... like the M&Ms, Milk Duds, Hershey---NO, forget that one! No Hershey Highway for me! Still got many flavors to choose from!!

shadowcat - You WOULD be my best man, but ain't thinkin' 'bout breaking THE code, if ever! So, better keep sharing those HOTTIES, just better have them cleaned up if you go first!!!! That 'fish' smell along with my Curve cologne does not mix well together!!

I know CT is just having fun with this topic.

Here would be my wedding preferences:

1) Ushers & best men would be complimented with packs of Viagra! (thanks greg) great idea.
2) Brides maids would be complimented with hygiene sprays and a dildo.
3) Brides maids would wear bikinis or be topless (thanks CT)
4) "Scarlet & Gray" (Grey Goose & Red Bull) would be served by that name in honor of the OSU Buckeyes! (thanks again CT)
5) Open bar for the guys; Cash bar for our gals, drink prices ranging from $10 shots all the way up to $500 bottles of champaigne!
6) Garter would be stuffed with dollar bills (thanks FONDL)
7) Bouncers for security would be present, but BLINDFOLDED!
8) A DJ would be present with a gagball in his mouth!
9) During the reception dance, inflated condoms would fall from the ceiling.
10) After the topless and thonged dance of the newlyweds, all others would be invited to join the dance floor in any desired fashion (clothing optional)
11) Wedding guests would be invited to view the honeymoon evening, with the bride & groom being on a round rotating bed, and the guests permitted in lockable peep boothes with an open window surrounding the bed, to view and throw tips! Booth entry cost=$20-----Tips=$20----Watching the newly married couple frolick on the wedding bed?-----UNTHINKABLE!! P.S. All bothes must be cleaned up by occupants!!!!

This short lived topic was fun & enjoyable, although like Larry the Cable Man would state, "GIT 'ER DONE!", but like Dr Laura says, Now, go do the right thing.

Uncle Bones Quote of the Day: Enjoy & live life daily to its fullest! Tomorrow, you may wake up and find you are not able to attain anymore HARD-ONS!
avatar for evilcyn
evilcyn
17 years ago
Bones, I can't ever imagine a day where you don't wake up with a hard on...LOL That would be a sign the end of the world is near...
avatar for ThisOldManPlayed1
ThisOldManPlayed1
17 years ago
LOL@<evilcyn>. You had me 'pegged' a long time ago sweets! Come to think of it.... I did wake up with another hard-on this morning, probably because when I went to sleep, I was thinking about my UPcoming visit! *lick*

I'm going to bring a printout of this topic with me for laughs.

avatar for DougS
DougS
17 years ago
Bones: If you ever have a wedding as described above, you BETTER invite ME!!! Hell, I think you could charge a cover for that shindig! Kind'a puts a new spin on the old reception tradition of the "dollar dance".... I'm sure the line for THAT would be out the door and around the block!
avatar for danapdg69
danapdg69
17 years ago
Instead of the wedding march, they would play "I'm In Love With a Stripper."
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
17 years ago
sick o dat song

avatar for ThisOldManPlayed1
ThisOldManPlayed1
17 years ago
Play "I'm In Love With A Stripper" for the wedding march.
Play "I Touch Myself" for the bride/groom dance! LOL

Doug - You know you had better be at that wedding!
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
17 years ago
Play "A little bit o' Monica in my life" (the mambo song that goes through about a zillion girls' names) for the DAY AFTER the wedding ... :)
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