tuscl

He Didn't Like Strippers . . .

Monday, November 12, 2007 12:02 PM
and he was telling me about an invasion that radically change the world, which is now many years past due, from non-human humans that resided on planets billions of light years away. He claimed to be one of these non-human humans even though he was given birth by a human female. For a limited time only trusting humans were invited to join the winning side and enjoy all manner of luxuries such as nudie cuties. :) I said why bother when you can just go to the local stripclub to find nudie cuties? The answer was that prostitution is evil. I asked even if they don't have sex? The answer: Yes, prostitution occurs just by showing the flesh which is a sin that non-human humans as well as god will not stand. Who knows if he even believed his own stories, but it sounded like he was trying to create his own religion. It was interesting in that he did visit stripclubs. He explained that his human body was defective and thus he unfortunately needed human contact. If he had his non-human human body, then he would be immune from the powers of evil strippers who just want to take advantage of him and refuse to return the genuine love he offers. In his opinion the human female strippers engaged in the greatest of all crimes. Namely, the selling of love for worthless money. He asked how could they be so heartless and look so attractive? His answer was that maybe they're not evil and just have defective human bodies like he was stranded with.

11 comments

  • Professor906090
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    17 years ago
    Jablake, remember I told you not to disclose my true identity on TUSCL? Oh, you ruined it! The signal has been sent and you might be abducted: they always need fresh test material. You might be able to bribe them by buying a few $5 LDs... :)
  • jablake
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    17 years ago
    Sorry to let you in on a little secret, but you fooled only the lesser beings. The highly developed TUSCLERS spotted you your first post! :) I suggest you keep the invas- the liberation forces under lettice till this site has been neutralized. Key Code: lettice = cover little secret = large secret liberation = invasion neutralized = nuked LDs = lascivious dances LLDs = long lascivious dances
  • Professor906090
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    17 years ago
    In that case I must self-destruct immediately. It takes about 2 seconds of my planet's time, which translates roughly to 97 years here, on Earth :(
  • jablake
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    17 years ago
    Not to worry. I'll just report you to the IRS. $5 million in LLDs on a declared income of $50,000 just ain't going to play well to the gmen or even the peanut gallery. And, while you're at let's see you explain the marble toilet, to wit: "Ministries from Fenton, Mo., to explain the tax-exempt purpose of a $23,000 'commode with marble top.'" [view link]
  • Professor906090
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    17 years ago
    Haha, good story. How did you know I was black, LOL?..
  • jablake
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    17 years ago
    Well, you frequent Angels and like BIG BOOTY. A. + B.B. = BLACK. :) And, when you're singing your travails it twaint over the wire . . .
  • ThisOldManPlayed1
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    17 years ago
    Personally........ I don't see where this topic has the slightest thing to do with strip clubs........... therefore *somebody* is being added to my "MUTE" list. Goodnight!
  • Professor906090
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    17 years ago
    Bones, are you there?
  • jablake
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    17 years ago
    Bye Bye Bones. :) Apparently he doesn't like kiss and tell. These strippers are truly angels to put up with half the garbage they do==at least at the less expensive inner city clubs. And, yes I did know a stripclub customer who 1) thought he was an advanced non-human human and 2) hated strippers for not returning his "love." In all fairness I think the customer sold his religion better than I attempted to explain it. I just had a closed mind because he could produce any hard proof or show special knowledge or special skills.
  • casualguy
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    17 years ago
    I think the strippers I talked to liked my alien story better. I told them I was abducted in a dream I had one night. (Notice as a disclaimer I said it was in a dream.) Anyway, the alien devices that are supposed to immobolize most humans didn't work on me. I don't remember now what the one alien did, but he/it ticked me off. I sucker punched him and knocked him out. Then I proceeded to attack the remaining aliens. Then I was hell bent on causing trouble on board their ship. I neutralized a lot of aliens. I traveled through different levels of their ship. I planned to take it over. However I discoved the ship was extremely large and I didn't know how to work the controls. For some reason I thought maybe they had emergency teleportation chambers. I remember chasing down a few terrifed aliens. I accidently got tricked and they emergency beamed me back to my sleeping body. I got the message that they were terrified of me and I am now black listed as far as future alien abductions go. I was thinking Darn, I wanted to take over their ship. Or I could tell the story of the 3 very hot looking blonde human looking aliens that took me aboard their ship. Actually I just remember a pleasant experience. I guess if you're really into it, you could ask a dancer, your planet or mine? The dream where I said I was watching an interstellar battle between two alien species far away from here didn't seem to get much interest. I said my dream became lucid and I got ticked off when one alien ship noticed me watching and fired on me. I was floating in space just watching. First with a thought, I annihilated their entire fleet with massive explosions wherever they had a ship. Then, with another thought, I wiped out their entire species on all their planets. The other species was real happy with me at that moment but the war would have dragged on. But then I went back in time and wiped out the one species from existence. I felt somehow still not satisfied as I saw time go back to now because the other species suddenly had no knowledge of me or what I did. Well I did say the dream was lucid. It's late, I'm rambling my thoughts. later.
  • jablake
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    17 years ago
    Hi casualguy, I see we have a budding sci fi writer. :) But, where are the alien strippers??? Seems like they would have been tasty morsels . . .
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