A delicate subject

I'm not into any kind of drug other than alcohol. Nor would I be into a girl that did illicit drugs. So I would find a different "regular". But that's me.

From my perspective, it's a matter of time before her problems with law enforcement become my problems with law enforcement.

I'd find a new CF.

Give her condolences on her friend and tell her to be careful coz you care.

If you're not close to her don't bring it up but ask how she's been. If she doesn't bring it up then don't.

Personally I'd keep my distance from her. Problems like that just escalate

Good thing the cops didn't pointlessly charge her. But, when the cops charge people and then give them deferred sentencing to leverage them into rehab or harm reduction, I think that may on the whole be good thing.

I would not knowingly buy dances from a dancer who uses heroin. If she bought the hot dose that killed her with money she made off me, I think that would be hard to live with.

Dancers with an addiction are, in general, tricky to deal with. If they end up homeless, that's a situation that's hard to bootstrap out of. But, it's often a $ pinch that will help motivate addicts to get serious about rehab or harm reduction.

I'm with those who would find another fav, unless this incident serves as a wake-up call that causes her to quit.

But I'm an asshole. I don't fuck with girls who I <em>know</em> abuse heroin, meth, crack, or opioids. I even tend to avoid those who can't control their alcohol or weed use.

Heroin? I’d avoid her like the plague.

She gave the other girl the dose that killed her and the police basically let her skate?

No way I'd keep seeing her. She is drama just waiting to happen. Don't get sucked into that whirlpool.

I think in order to truly understand you would have to do heroin as well doc. To get on her level. Then I would talk to her in the club about it And whoever sold her those drugs bring him into this too. Let’s have a group talk. I think we have to come at this from all angles. Also move her out for the house, get some fresh air, sleep outdoors for a while. I usually do this with my favorite strippers, if you can’t find the woods, the street is fine. If it’s cold just hop in the dumpster.

I’d find another club for a few months. Seriously.

I don’t see why there needs to be any change – at the end of the day he's a customer and she’s a dancer/service-provider – it’s not as if he’s dating this chick, and per the OP nothing indicates he’s seeing her outside the club.

99% of custies are not purview to a dancer’s personal life nor is it really their business – as long as she behaves properly in the club that is all that matters – so I don’t see any reason why the OP has to dump her – again 99% of custies have no-clue what a dancer does in her personal life and one would imagine many of these girls have a lot of shit/drama going-on in the personal-lives that 99% of custies are totally clueless about but at the end of the day it’s pretty-much a non-issue if you are keeping it ITC.

w.r.t. what to say when you see her – what is there to say? She’s neither a family-member nor a personal-friend – the dancer may likely not wanna bring-it-up herself; and I don’t see what can be gained by talking-about-it – I’d just take a chill-attitude and ease back into it w/ her ITC and if she brings it up be sympathetic but I don’t see it as something “you can’t get past" ITC – perhaps it might be a bit awkard the first time you meet-up w/ her but life goes on.

you can still see that dancer if you so choose. that overdose topic should be avoided as talking about it - well i just don't see anything good out of it by doing so.

there was guy i used to to the strip clubs with had a fave that was a heroin addict. she was a fucking pig. sometimes he would go on drug runs with her to these shitty neighborhoods. he told me that instead of walking her dog she would just let it shit all over the bath tub.

I guess if you see her simply as a piece of meat with tits and you have no conscience go on like nothing happened. Personally Id kiss her goodbye and move on.

I see her as contributing to the death of another human being. I would hope the prosecutor would review the facts and file charges.

When the girl overdosed did your regular make any attempt to get her help?

You should consider this your last and best warning to stay away from her. Heroine people are trouble and soon enough her trouble will spread to you.

Don't mention it unless she brings it up.also don't get involved with stripper bullshit,they have hundreds of boyfriend's dead or in prison.

I've known some stripper that were renting houses and a few that were even buying them.

This story reminds me of one involving a favorite Follies dancer. She was cute and petite and we had done several VIPs together. One day she came up to me looking very sad. I asked what was wrong. She told me that she didn't feel like being there but she needed the money. Seems 3 guys broke into her apartment, shot and killed her BF and make off with $1200 that belonged to her. After hearing her story and seeing how pathetic she looked, I just couldn't bring myself to want to do a VIP with her. I gave her a $20 and hoped that things got better for her. An after analysis by me and my friend decided that the whole break in was drug related.

Papi said "I don’t see why there needs to be any change – at the end of the day he's a customer and she’s a dancer/service-provider"


That's true. Nothing has to change. But, he came here for feedback and most people here seem to be solidly of the opinion that he should look for another dancer. If the dancer's heroin use is such that she's causing her friends to die, then it's likely that she has a wide range of destructive habits. My experience has been that if you spend time near such people (even in a customer/provider framework) then those destructive habits will eventually bleed over. And, I'll be honest and say that I don't love spending time near such people, especially when there's absolutely nothing I can do to help aside, except finance their destructive habits. And that's not how 'helping' works.

I absolutely don't think that docsavage needs to feel guilty about any part of this. But, if it were me, I'd consider what small part of my money went towards buying the heroin that killed someone, and I'd move on to someone else without thinking about it.

^ That's what my dad always told me, if you roll around in the gutter with the dogs, you're bound to get fleas.

@C.M.I.: "And, I'll be honest and say that I don't love spending time near such people, especially when there's absolutely nothing I can do to help aside, except finance their destructive habits. And that's not how 'helping' works."

Bingo. I certainly don't insist that others feel the same way, but having more than a few friends and family who are addicted one substance or another, I know the truth of the fact that giving an addict money is <em>not</em> helpful.

Sounds like she should be in prison.

I'd stay away from her and her obvious lack of care for human life.

@shadow what causes you to think drugs were involved? Many people know strippers tend to have a lot of cash at home, cause they can tax problems if they deposit it.

After reading your description of what occurred, your stripper regular seems to have dodged a very bad situation. She provided drugs to a friend who subsequently died.

If your stripper regular is an addict, and her main drug is heroin, I would recommend you move away from her. If her club is small, and it’s difficult to distance from her, you might need to find another club too. This type of addiction, and drug sharing, is no joke, and it can lead to other bad situations.

As has been said above, it is only a matter of time before her problems become your problems.

ilbbaicnl - because them killing her BF needlessly.

No way she looks good if she shoots up that stuff has people looking like zombies find some standards.

@shadow Usually the people who last as slingers are the ones who are not heavy users themselves. I don't think you can assume that the average slinger has a itchier trigger finger than the average robber.

What are you trying to say? Are you trying to console her, advise her, scold her, give her an opportunity to take responsibility (lol) I just don't see the point of any of that. Addicts are notoriously selfish and will lie/cheat/steal for their next fix so don't expect honest answers. You are just a means to that end.

Otherwise you could see this as an opportunity. Just follow the Icey model and become her new dealer (of clean junk) and pimp her out.

@eastcoast addiction is a very individualized thing. Most heroin addicted get emaciated and beady eyed, but not all, or it at least it takes them much longer to get like that.

Do something (someone) else.

"One of my stripper regulars just invited another stripper over to her house. She then gave this girl some heroin and she had an overdose and then died there in my regular's house. The police investigated it and decided it was an accidental death. The next time I go in this club and see her I'm not sure how to handle this."

How do you know that one of your stripper regulars actually gave another stripper heroin causing an overdose and death? Who told you? It may not even be true. At this point, it's just gossip.

If your stripper regular doesn't mention it, keep your silence, too. If she mentions it, tell her she needs to see a drug rehab counselor and let the professional deal with all the sordid details. Don't get involved. Most likely (like 100%), if she mentions it and can't get you involved she'll distance herself from you and you will no longer be one of her regulars, problem solved.

Thank you everyone for your responses. There are differing views but there is an overwhelming consensus among the experienced strip club goers here that I should not ever see or have any kind of relationship with this girl outside the club so I will certainly follow that advice.