RIP Stephen Sondheim

Space geneious and inventer of the grunges

Sunday, November 28, 2021 1:48 PM

One of the greats has passed. I remember this time when the great Sondheim replied to a letter from an aspiring composer/songwriter named Doctor Phil (yours truly, not the bozo on the TV) I had sent him a synopsis of a libretto I was working on that was called “Cats 2: Even Cattier”. It starts off as a dark and gritty tale of Rum Tum Tugger in the throes of heroin addiction. But then fate slaps that cat upside the head when aliens from Uranus attack and it turns out the only thing that can gum up the alien death rays is cat hair. So bingo bango bongo ol’ Rum Tum becomes a general and saves all life on Earth. But he sacrifices himself to do so. Then God descends from heaven and tells everybody that Rum Tum is actually a Devine being and instructs them to venerate Rum Tum, who rises from the pet cemetery as a being of light. Then it ends with a nice dance number. Do any of you weirdos want to guess what Mr. Sondheim said when he replied?

9 comments

Cashman1234
•
3 years ago
RIP Steven Sondheim. I’m sure Mr Sondheim was fascinated by your script. But, if Rum Tum wasn’t packing fudge along the great white way - I doubt any musical would be written about him.
twentyfive
•
3 years ago
Are you Dave Anderson?
DoctorPhil.
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3 years ago
Mr Cashman are you prejudiced against homosexual cats? Don’t be homocatophobic. You’re welcome.
Cashman1234
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3 years ago
I’m not homophobic. A Dr should have better reading comprehension. My comment indicated that Mr Sondheim was likely heterophobic.
DoctorPhil.
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3 years ago
Did Mr. Sondheim pan you big musical extravaganza because you are straight? I bet it was the quality of the dance. I mean really, straight white guys can do a lot of things but dancing ain’t one of those things. In fact, there was this time a few years back I saw some dork in a cheap suit with slicked back hair imitating John Travolta while swaying away in perfect three quarter time. Alas, few techno songs are waltzes. Wait...that was in Jacksonville FL...I bet I know who that was.
Cashman1234
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3 years ago
Please don’t try to counter your claim calling me homophobic by disparaging another race. I see your counter argument has devolved to insulting the great Rick Dugan (and his stylish wardrobe)!
DoctorPhil.
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3 years ago
Mr. Cash, you seriously need to relax and grow a sense of humor or you’ll become another Dugan. You should google “Bill Maher how to take a joke” and watch the video. You know why I insult Dugan? Two reasons. First, he’s a gimboid. Second, he often says funny shit when he is criticized. I laugh when people say funny shit. I like laughing. You should try it. You’re welcome.
Cashman1234
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3 years ago
I laugh at things that are funny. But insulting a an esteemed fellow high-standing member of this site is not something I can condone! The last thing I need is a council of Ricks showing up at my home. They would leave my lawn in a shambles - and I doubt they pick up after themselves (when nature calls).
DoctorPhil.
•
3 years ago
Touché

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