FREE MEDICAL ADVICE

Tetradon
I'll act nicer if you'll act smarter.
For entertainment purposes only.
Free and worth every penny.
But better qualified than other advice on this board.

39 comments

Latest

nicespice
3 years ago
What type of crystals best align the chakra?
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ The kind you bang your head against until you stop believing in such ridiculous things.
TheeOSU
3 years ago
Clear Quartz
Clear quartz is known as the universal healer. It is a natural amplifier, so it naturally enhances the abilities of other crystals within the room. You can place clear quartz on all chakra points to restore balanced energy and bring harmony to the body.

Rutilated Quartz
You can also place rutilated quartz on all chakra points. It encourages a multilevel energy flow and works to restore the usual energy to under or over-active areas.

Labradorite
Labradorite links to all the chakra points and enables them to move quickly between states. It is a crystal that easily removes blockages, prevents energy drainage, and prevents negativity from settling in one place.

TheeOSU
3 years ago
Your welcome_ DrTheeOSU
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ Don't hijack my thread lulz
datinman
3 years ago
Dear Dr Tetra,

I went ahead and took Clear Quartz, Rutilated Quartz, and Labradorite. It didn't say how many, so I swallowed 3 each. My chakras are feeling more aligned, but I am having the same queasy feeling I get when i read a Dave_Anderson thread. What should I do?
RandomMember
3 years ago
My annoying uncle David Anderdon is a MAGA antivaxer and he doesn't carry any health insurance because he doesn't like Obama. He also reads InfoWars daily. He's complaining about shortness of breath, and I'm wondering if it's safe to intubate the dude with my old Hoover vacuum? I'll change the filter bag to keep things sanitary. Please advise. Thanks.
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ Queasy feelings when you read Dave_Anderson threads are healthy and normal. If those feelings subside, I suggest a frontal lobotomy.
RandomMember
3 years ago
I swear to God I posted without seeing Justin's post.
Tetradon
3 years ago
^^ Sure, go ahead and intubate. Then stick him with the insurance bill when he's out.

Infowars, I recommend high-dose antipsychotics.
Icee Loco (asshole)
3 years ago
Do you concur with Trumps covid cure consisting of drinking lysol and shoving a flashlight up your ass?
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ I regret to inform you that your preferred home-cure methods will not work, though something tells me COVID is not why you stuck the flashlight up your ass.

By liking your own post, you have been diagnosed with a sadly-common affliction here, known as "having a small penis."
Icee Loco (asshole)
3 years ago
Your reply is an utterance nit an answer. Please answer the question
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ For not reading that first sentence, I also diagnose you with "mental retardation."
Tetradon
3 years ago
^^ Biden does show signs of dementia, though one could argue he was never that lucid or bright in the first place.
Icee Loco (asshole)
3 years ago
So you refuse to answer lulz
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ To dumb it down, the answer is "n. o." If you take medical advice from Trump, you deserve to be filtered out of the gene pool.

I prescribe you some GED prep courses so I don't have to dumb down my knowledge for you.
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ I'll refer you to Hunter Biden for that one.
Cashman1234
3 years ago
When I read certain discussions on TUSCL my head aches and my sphincter clenches. I’m unsure of how to cure this affliction.
twentyfive
3 years ago
Are the threads written by PhatBoy the equivalent of the prep you drink the day before you get a colonoscopy
I mean every time he posts it’s just shit all over the place
Cashman1234
3 years ago
I agree Phatboy had some crazy discussions. They were clench worthy.
Tetradon
3 years ago
@Cashman and @25, depending on the poster, I r prescribe hitting your head against a brick wall till you have double vision (for the one that repeats the same quotes), a few tabs of acid (for the knight of the round huffy), a bottle of cheap vodka (for Mr. lulz above), followed by a good hard wank.

It'll make you feel good, and there's no way those threads could make less sense.
twentyfive
3 years ago
^ I think it would feel better if we could get to bang PhatBoys head against that brick wall, it might even help the poor bastard.
elmer
3 years ago
Two days ago I had multiple double lap dances on a hard seat now my ass cheeks are sore.

Should I avoid double dances or go with small spinners?
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ For him, I recommend post-birth abortion
Tetradon
3 years ago
^^ Elmer, I recommend toughing it out. Papi_Chulo can open his Rolodex of voluptuous black women
JamesSD
3 years ago
Does this look infected?
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ It's severe genital herpes
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ Estrogen blockers mimic menopause
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ I have a colleague who operates out of a warehouse in West Baltimore...
minnow
3 years ago
T-don: Would you recommend going to the following physicians ? What are the reviews saying about them ?

1) Ben Dover - Proctologist

2) Ignatius Peter (aka I.P.) Daly - Urologist

3) Jerry Mander - General Surgery Chairs AMA Political Action Committee

4) Sally Mander - Veterinarian Wife of Dr. Jerry Mander - Could these 2 be the posters who
start Tuscl threads about best clubs for couples ?

5) Hugh G. Rection - Penile Implant Specialist

6) Patricia (aka "Pat" ) Fanny - Licensed Sex Therapist

7) Jen N. Tonic - Substance Abuse Counselor.

8) William Gold - Family Medicine - Played college football, has nickname of "Big Bill"

9) Ben Gay - Sports Medicine.

Thank you for any input.
Tetradon
3 years ago
I believe 1 posts here as BBBC
2 was the golden shower guru at my med school
3 likes to watch me nail 4
5 could rack up some major business here
6 likes to get bent over my knee and spanked
7 moonlights as a bartender at Desire, it brings in business
9, let's just say he "is," not past tense, with 8
minnow
3 years ago
Dr. Hugh G. Rection advises that he's not accepting patients my age. Dr. Harry P. Ness accepting patients my age. Would you recommend going to him ?

Also, would you recommend sending ones teenage daughter to this gynecologist : Dr. Will (nickname "Pop ") Cherry ?
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ Dr. Hugh G. Rection can take care of some of our self-liking posters here. ICEE and Dave_Anderson can use all the help they can get.

Dr. Harry P. Ness is an exhibitionist, and an intimidating one. Would I recommend? Depends what you want.

Dr. Pop Cherry, let's just say it's going to happen to her sometime. Best in a controlled environment.
minnow
3 years ago
Tbnt wrt Dr. Ness. Curious what rick dugan would say about your thoughts on Dr. Cherry.
Tetradon
3 years ago
^ Underneath his swaggering bro machismo, Rick saw me to fix his Stage 4 bed-wetting.
minnow
3 years ago
T-don, you're quick on the uptake, except for a couple of things: 1) You overlooked Dr. Dover's distinguished career as a US Navy doctor. He was the only one in his year group to be selected for promotion to Rear Admiral, retiring as a Rear Admiral after a 33 year career. 2) You failed to address the rumors going around about Dr. "Big Bill" Gold's tendency to overcharge his patients.

Moving on, your recommendations on these 3:

1) Dan D. Lyon - Allergist

2) Moe Mentum - Attorney specializing in medical malpractice lawsuits, and medical insurance claim denials.

3) Moe Notony - Conducts seminars on "Understanding Medicare". Should I sign up ?

Thanks.
Tetradon
3 years ago
Yes, a Navy doctor. He's a real semen, I mean seaman.

1, Dandy Lion was so named because of his fashion sense and rocking beard. Being an allergist is coincidental.

2, whatever, I'm clean as a whistle

3 can't be worse lecturing about the healthcare system than SJG, can he?

Sera, they were Siamese twins sharing a uterus
Tetradon
3 years ago
I prescribe Joe Biden an industrial-size drum of Vaseline.
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