The "L" word...

shadowcat
Atlanta suburb
I have only had one stripper use the word "love". She was my first and only real ATF. After a year of our relationship, she started ending her mails to me with love ya. Then it became more personal. In person. When ever we met. I felt kind of clumsy the first time I responded to her and kissed her. It was real on my part. Do I think that it was real on her part? Yes! But not in the romantic sense. More like father/daughter except that I had special privliges. There was a 40 year difference in our ages and I think that we both knew that nothing could come of it but the sharing of caring for each other was enough for us. She is gone but will never be forgotten.

13 comments

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casualguy
17 years ago
My first ATF that I remember used to like using that word alot. She kept asking "you love me don't you?" I found it slightly annoying at times because what am I supposed to say to that? No, I hate you? I didn't think that would go over well. I did feel some kind of special connection with her for a while. At other times I wanted to avoid her but she found me anyway. I think once or twice I even visited her club when she wasn't supposed to be working. She mysteriously showed up a while after I had been there. She reminded me of a small puppy or dog very happy to see someone come home. It seemed like we had a slight age difference since I was about 9 or 10 years older than her. That seems like a lot when you're only 18 or 19.
Clubber
17 years ago
shadowcat,

Sounds like my first ATF, although she isn't really gone. We had and have mutual friends, but I had done something stupid and messed it up some time ago.
Clubber
17 years ago
casualguy,

Your ATF was about 9 years old?

"It seemed like we had a slight age difference since I was about 9 or 10 years older than her. That seems like a lot when you're only 18 or 19."
Professor906090
17 years ago
Casualguy must be 27-29. I wonder if he would be the youngest member of the board.
motorhead
17 years ago
Of late, my ATF of a year and a half has started using the "L" word. I refuse to use it when responding back to her because I just think it is stripper shit. I told her that the word "love" is forbidden to use in strip clubs, but she just dismissed that notion. We even had a discussion of the three words the Greeks used for love: "eros", "philos" and "agape" and we mutually agreed that what she felt was not erotic love. (PS - maybe Book Guy will help us out with the definitions, cuz I'm not an expert).

Like shadowcat, I often think of it as father/daughter relationship (I don't have any kids of my own) but that sort of freaks her out.
FONDL
17 years ago
My ATF tells me she loves me every time I talk to her. Which is almost every day. But she says that to all her close friends and relatives. I like it.
ThisOldManPlayed1
17 years ago
Doug S - I can imagine the "I love yous" going on between you and your ATF. Good luck young man!

Myself.... I'd rather hear my dancer telling me, "I love the way you suck on my clit" or "I love the way you keep me wet & horny". I don't particularly want to hear the "I love you" line for quite awhile, although my current S.O. says it daily. If you can read "between the lines", you note I used the word 'current'. Things are beginning to change (as well as her) and the 'current' may be the 'past'.
lopaw
17 years ago
I still cringe abit when any dancer uses that word near me. I don't know why....intimacy issues, perhaps?

Hee hee hee...when I first saw this thread, I thought the "L" word was for "Lesbian" (from the Showtime series). Damn.
parodyman-->
17 years ago
Ever hear the "S" - word? SUCKER! That's you if you believe the "L" word. Can't you see it is just another ploy to extract cash from your wallet?
casualguy
17 years ago
I was remembering when I was around 27 and my ATF was about 19 years old. Then I was remembering when I was 18 or 19, someone in their late 20's or 8 or 9 years older than me seemed a lot older at that age. After all at the young age of 18, nine years is half of your entire life. I thought the dancer probably felt the same way since she acted like I was a lot older than her even though I didn't look that old. This was over 10 years ago. I can talk about things like it just happened and take different perspectives. I guess not everyone is used to my way of thinking or I didn't clarify it enough.
DougS
17 years ago
Bones:
I have been VERY careful not to use the "L" word with any of my girls, especially Miss ATF. I HAVE admitted to her that I have "feelings for her", but even though she probably suspects it's more than that, I don't think it's time to throw that word out there. It's one of those words that once you "play" it, you can't take it back... it's "out there". It's also not a word that I tend to use freely, or take lightly.

As for her, she HAS uttered it once, I think. It was probably in January. They'd had some heavy snow down in her neck of the woods, and one day she had to leave work early in order to get home. If she worked later, she'd probably have been stranded in Indy, not able to get home. Anyhow, upon her return to the club for her next shift, she was told that because she left early, she was being suspended for a week. She called me, beside herself. It was bad enough that she'd just driven over an hour to work, but now she was going to have to be off work without any money coming in. (I'm a sucker for a pretty girl that is crying... they could get me to do just about anything) I told her to hang on for a few minutes and I'd call her right back. When I called her back 15 min later, I informed her that I'd just wired her money to help out. She didn't ask for it... it's just the nice guy that I am. Anyhow, she said that was the nicest thing anynone had ever done for her and she was noticeably very happy and excited. I think her exact words when I first told her, were... "Oh thank you... I love you!" Of course I knew it wasn't said in the context of what I'd like to have heard, but it sounded and felt good, nonetheless. I think she realized what she said, and since I think she's been careful not to let that word slip out there like that.
chandler
17 years ago
As I said the last time Shadowcat asked, strippers and I say it all the time. Same as I do with friends and lovers in regular life. It's not anything I have a big hangup over. Sometimes, she'll say, "I love you you're so obnoxious you asshole." It's the thought that counts.
ThisOldManPlayed1
17 years ago
I can't recall the number of times I've told 'evilcyn' that I loved her while she was climbing all over me. But, let's be serious, it was in the heat of passion! Licks
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