Getting Stood Up.

36 comments

• winex

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  4 years ago

  It happens. Sorry to hear that it happened to you. But life does go on.
• Warrior15

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  4 years ago

  Should I give the 9 another chance tomorrow ?
• wallanon

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  4 years ago

  That sucks. Since you asked, not to pour salt but it sounds like her tomorrow might've moved up and bumped you. Unless you absolutely must have that 9 I'd scratch her for now. You can play it cool and maybe it ends up being fine, or maybe she thinks she can jerk you around and she'll be flaky all the time now.
• winex

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  4 years ago

  As long as you don't have to blow someone off to be with her, why not? The worst thing that happens is that you get blown off again. The best thing that happens is that she shows up and feels guilty. I don't know enough to calculate the probability of either event happening, but the upside far outweighs the downside. So it seems like risk/reward is in your favor.
• Papi_Chulo

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  4 years ago

  As the saying goes - karma is a bitch - you stood up the '8'; then you got stood up by the '9'
• rattdog

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  4 years ago

  yeah give her another shot. from then on you'll really know where you stand with her. tomorrow is also saturday - you gots to make the most out of those.
• Papi_Chulo

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  4 years ago

  "9's" often have multiple options 😎
• Papi_Chulo

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  4 years ago

  I guess next-time it'd be better to just wait for her outside or at the bar so you don't have to endure "the walk of shame"
• IceyLoco

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  4 years ago

  If youre paying her then cancel on her for a while. Let her hurt financially for standing you up
• Warrior15

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  4 years ago

  Papi, That is probably want I am most mad about is that "walk of shame". I'm not going back to that restaurant again for a while. I at least let the 8 know a couple of days ahead, so it's not like I kept her from doing something else.
• winex

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  4 years ago

  @Icey - you may find this difficult to believe, but most people can date someone other than prostitutes or stray dogs. I know that is foreign to you and far different than anything that you have ever experienced. But there is a reason that people call you “special”. And in your case, that isn’t a good thing.
• pistola

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  4 years ago

  I’d give her one more shot, she may make it up to you. If she flakes again, well...
• CJKent (Banned)

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  4 years ago

  @Warrior15 Make sure that you let her know that you prioritize reliability above almost all other traits as you search for a lasting relationship with a 9 you are interested in. “You teach people how to treat you.” I suggest that you tell the girl (stripper or sugar baby or civilian) what you need/want regarding being on time and or letting each other know in advance (this is the key to no get upset, enough advance notice) if anything changes or you have to reschedule. If you’re just getting to know a potential ATF and she is late more than once or not show, your know she has failed to honor basic social conventions in such a fundamental way that I don’t believe it is worth your time to try to change her behavior. If she doesn’t get it by now, and adult 18 years or older when will she ever get it? I have told a Fav before that I don’t wait for doctors, lawyers, teachers, priest etc or even family members more than 15 minutes, without communication or explanation. Now days with cellphones is even easier to let each other know if you are going to be late. I explained to her that having people waiting is a power trip, is disrespectful and you would be wasting their time, and time/life is one of the most valuable things. Needless to say she failed to show up one time for OTC after a handful of good meetings, I texted her, no response, I left after 15 minutes. Next day she gave me a lame excuse she was sick and fell asleep at a girlfriend’s. And asked to please give her one last chance. We meet a couple more times for OTC and it was OK. The third time again she was a no show, after 15 minutes I sent her a text telling her “I waited for you 15 minutes for the last time”. I haven seen her after, she texted me and left me voicemail messages apologizing and trying to get together for OTC, I never responded to her. My last FAV and I would agree to meet for VIP and was never late, if something came up we would let the other know and reschedule accordingly. One the best girls I have had the pleasure, she texted me one last time to let me know she was moving and tanked me for the good times.
• NAAAASTY

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  4 years ago

  Tell her you're not into dealing with flakes (but phrased more tactfully, such as someone who can't keep commitments). See how she responds. If she talks about how she's going to make it up to you, she's still game. If she gives some excuse w/o a counter offer, you were just one of many options. If she ignores, she was never serious. NAAAASTY
• herbtcat

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  4 years ago

  Whether she's an 8 or a 9, while you are balls deep in a dark room or booth, she's going to be a 10. Gives a whole new meaning to the old saying "One in the hand is worth 2 in the bush," doesn't it? Maybe we should paraphrase that to: "One in the bush is worth two on the text app." Anyway I agree with CJKent. No matter how hot she is, if you let her dictate your schedule, you will always be her consolation prize when a PL with a bigger... ahem!.. "wallet" bails on her... which is probably why she said "tonight" only at first. Then, Praise the Lord! A spot opened up the next day. Aren't you lucky? (The answer is no. She pwnd you.).
• doctorevil

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  4 years ago

  Bummer. Ordering her drink too was probably testing fate though.
• Lil Jayne Doe

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  4 years ago

  You were quick to blow off the 8, the 9 was quick to do the same to you... You jump to next availability and she knows she owns you... I'd make her wait... As for the 8, maybe dont blow her off she may be a notch lower, but respects your time ....
• rattdog

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  4 years ago

  something does not seem right. the 8 being described - well maybe she wasn't an 8 to begin with. she may actually have been a solid 7, maybe 7.5 tops. if she really was an 8, most guys would not squash a date already in place in order to be with that 9.
• MackTruck

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  4 years ago

  This is why I always pick up my sugar Baby at da truck stop
• Muddy

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  4 years ago

  Warrior did you still get any thing to eat there. I would like proud lonely champ. I deal with this shit all the time. I would give it one more shot there. That just how these girls are, you already know that though. She might be talking to a few guys at once and double booking.
• Lone_Wolf

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  4 years ago

  OP: A second chance would depend on if I had an established OTC relationship or not. If it was the first meeting I would next her. If we were already doing nakey than second chance it is. As pathetic as it is, I always gift $ (not much for just a meal). I've never been stood up at restaurant. However, early in my hobby days I was waiting in the restaurant. Honey is texting every fifteen minutes saying she was just around the corner. Waiter keeps asking if I want to order but I kept saying my guest is about to arrive. An hour later the honey finally shows looking every bit a dancer and acting frazzled due to some drama she was going through. Like you, everyone around me saw this unfold. Embarrassing as hell. Now, I'll wait 15 minutes then walk... probably.
• Warrior15

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  4 years ago

  A little background. I had seen both of these sugar babes before. The 8, only once a few months ago. And I remember the sex as being rather blah. But it's still sex with an 8. The 9, I had a history with. We were a regular item for a while. The evening was going to be one of those hang from the rafters type sessions. I'm sober now and not mad any more. I now know the cause of the cancel was her legitimate job got in the way. She just started somewhere and they dumped something on her last minute. I've got history with this girl, so she's not lying. Of course I"m gonna give her another chance. It's hang from the rafters sex with a 9, right ? I was just embarrassed, mad and a little drunk last night. Thanks for listening.
• wallanon

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  4 years ago

  Stuff happens. Garfield is still in the lead for the TUSCL time wasted rant of the year, but yours was up there. If the sex with the 8 is a dud the next time, might need to retire that one.
• RTP

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  4 years ago

  This discussion is exactly why we call ourselves PL’s.
• Muddy

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  4 years ago

  Dude if you DIDN’T drunk rant I would be pissed. Honestly look at these other threads we really have nothing better to talk about
• rattdog

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  4 years ago

  now it all makes sense. dude already hooked up with them before. a 9 that is almost willing to do it anywhere and do it good is a given to be forgiven. that 8 could only be a max an 8. but now that we know she's a dud point deductions will have to be made. in this case it's a full point. if it was real bad -1.5, which makes her a 6.5 8's like these - i don't know why they even bother to go for guys. they should just buy an electrical cock and buzz themselves to sleep.
• winex

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  4 years ago

  @Warrior - I didn't realize these were paid dates. That does change my recommendation considerably.
• Papi_Chulo

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  4 years ago

  ^ a guy that can get 2 non-pay dates, one with a '8', and another with a '9'; is not gonna be posting on TUSCL
• Papi_Chulo

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  4 years ago

  ^ except Juice
• CJKent (Banned)

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  4 years ago

  @Warrior15 Make sure to always show your best self by not drinking and posting. “I am serious about no alcohol, no drugs. Life is too beautiful.” Believe it or not, you don’t need alcohol to have fun. You should have offered to help her with her working late assignments and bring her dinner. In any case thank you for your clarification, just don’t drink and drive or post or get mad etc. Just don’t drink and don’t have blah sex and don’t get mad or upset about anything, life is too short and to beautiful. And Pics and Vids of hanging from the rafters sex with a 9 or it didn’t happen! :D
• Warrior15

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  4 years ago

  Papi, Even I have to give a Up Vote for that last comment. Am I capable of bagging a hot 45 year old ? Sure. But if I want a hot 25 year old, I'm paying. Sorry I didn't make that clear from the beginning. Any comments that I ever make on this board are part of my mongering exploits. If they were actual girlfriends, I"m not talking about them here. :-)
• Nidan111

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  4 years ago

  The worst that could happen is that she blows you off by not showing up again. The best that could happen is that she shows up and then BLOWS YOU OFF under the table. Life’s a gamble. Just do it.
• gammanu95

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  4 years ago

  A buddy of mine would always wait at the bar. The hostess or maitre'd will understand that you arrived before your date and will work with you on holding the table (for a price). It costs less than losing face.
• DeclineToState

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  4 years ago

  Context is everything. With you having clarified you have history with the 9 and a lot of fun, me personally I'd give it another shot but walk for good if that happened again. It's so easy for her to have shot you a cancel text in advance of you arriving at restaurant. -@CJKent: "I don’t wait for doctors, lawyers, teachers, priest etc or even family members more than 15 minutes, without communication or explanation." Totally agree but am guessing you've walked out of a lot of doctor's offices then - doctors are notorious for keeping you waiting.
• rickdugan

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  4 years ago

  I rarely do advance planning anymore with strippers, in part precisely because of the risk of my time being burned. A day is like a week in stripper time. Anything can change between the time she agrees and her mindset on the day of the planned event. And in the rare instance where I make an exception to this, I minimize my time and cash investment until she shows up. With that said, I've never actually had a girl tell me she's on the way and then ghost. That would suck, but I would have been in the parking lot instead of the restaurant in this scenario, especially with a new girl, so I just would have just switched gears and pointed my car to my favorite club. I find same night club to hotel meet-ups much more reliable. She's already out working in stripper mode, so she: (1) doesn't have to make an excuse to her SO; (2) isn't neck deep in her inevitable daytime life drama; and (3) doesn't have the cold light of one or more days to question her impulse decision.
• Studme53

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  4 years ago

  1st comment - good for you. Nice to have such problems. 2nd comment - you are experiencing Karma