Selective Dancers

More than a few times, but then I'm buying a huge number of dances and spend many hours at strip clubs. And, the dancer doesn't have to be hot, either. Usually, it is not an outright ban on a dance. What will happen is the dance will have NO contact or almost NO contact. The discrimination could be for any reason including height!

I'm overly focused on the dollar although some people strangely conclude that money doesn't interest me just because it doesn't always make my number one spot. I remember about 2 years ago a friend had a property for sale and quoted me a price. I assumed if his price was met that was all that concerned him-----my assumption was dead wrong. I found a buyer who was eager to buy and well qualified. A very high class individual who I'd known for years. My friend more than double his price because he felt that he should receive a large premium for doing business with people he disliked. In fact, he told me he'd rather NOT sell or sell for less than his asking to the right kind of person. It is funny I hear people yap it is all about the green and then when confronted by someone who truly doesn't share that value system they usually become all bent out of shape. If money is their god, then by god it has to be everyone's god.

Wait a second, Doug. You mean to tell me that a hot young girl who squirms on my lap isn't always doing it because she's attracted to me? Oh, that's a good one.

I don't ever recall (but then I am really really old), having a dancer turn me down. However, I've gotten dances (usually at the old PP in Memphis) where a very hot looking dancer would hardly do anything lap dancing for me. There are dancers that could be considered stuck-up, but most will lap dance for anyone for the $$$$$.

I've seen a number of dancers that dance for no one! I guess tips are enough for them. I've also seen some that will only do private or VIP area dances and then, often for only selected customers.

I will also state, I did not see any of them working for very long.

The place where my ATF worked had a really attractive dancer who spent all her time with a guy in a wheel chair whenever he was there, which was fairly often. If he was there she wouldn't go near any other customers, they spent all their time shooting pool. I obvioulsy don't know the full story but I always sort of admired her for that.

I don't know if I ever ran into a dancer who would only dance for certain guys, but I've known a lot who wouldn't dance with certain guys. I think that's pretty common.

I remember one selective dancer who worked at the same club for about 3 years. This clean cut young guy was telling her that she had to dance for him because he was willing to pay her. She laughed and said she didn't have to dance for anyone if she didn't feel like it. He takes out a impressive roll of cash whereupon she says look there are plenty of nice dancers for you please go and make one of them happy. He gets more aggressive and she then throws herself at me (she didn't like me even a little when we first met years earlier). The young guy says you prefer that loser to me?! She says damn straight and you better be careful who you are calling a loser. He's very popular in this club. The young guy shoves his face into mine and I think it is great fun. I say boy, it ain't worth it, but if you need to see blood and pain you come to the right bar. He seemed to pick up on "right bar" and as if by magic he took a couple steps back. The selective dancer is now goading him. Saying what you afraid of a small old man? I had to tell her to pipe down and the kid to go buy a dance from one of the other dancers pronto. Actually, needed to get up and point him in the right direction. He complied, but I had to grab the damn dancer hard to keep her quiet. She was just so eager to see some blood. :( Says the boy needed to be taught some manners. :( I did finally talk some sense into her silly head.

I have noticed some dancers that I have perceived to be selective, but maybe not to the extent you talk about. On several occassions I have noticed dancers go from table to table and get turned down for dances then bypass me completely. It's usually young, less experienced girls who are looking to party and find some guy to buy free drinks for them. I'm usually drinking bottled water or Diet Coke, so the party girls seem to pass me by sometimes.

That's interesting. I notice that dancers' on average seem to dislike my drinking the bottled water. Perhaps they're fraid I'm probably watching the money more closely or am less of a good time or just cheap.

This one dancer commented that she was surprised that I spent more on her than the guys buy Hennessy and other high ticket items. In her opinion it makes more sense to spend money on a real product like expensive drinks than waste it on a dancer. Sort of like buddies who believe in spending money on a fancy car to impress the ladies, but can't see dropping a $100 on a drop dead beautiful dancer. I've been asked this question it seems like a million times: Would you rather be spending this money on dancers or have a brand new truck/sports car/boat/some other garbage. Everytime the person is amazed that I'd rather have the women over some garbage made in Detroit or even something good from Japan. To me it is such an easy choice. I remember a lady friend saying wouldn't you rather have a new wardrobe? I answered even if I was wealthy I wouldn't have interest in fancy duds. It bores me. Then she says what about stocks? I say yes stocks are real cuddly and cute. :( One friend says but a woman is only good for 15 minutes! I said I didn't know that and explained that it is easy for me to spend hours at the club.

It's every customer's fantasy that a girl agrees to dance for him because she likes him, so it's no surprise that the kind of rumor Doug describes gets started. Customers are also quick to take it personally when a dancer skips over them, like David writes, so a rumor could start from that side of the deal, too. Although that kind of selective dancer may exist, I bet the rumored ones outnumber the actual ones.

I've known escorts like that, but never strippers.

I've had strippers who happened to be with a customer or busy and couldn't dance for me, but never "no, you aren't part of the crowd I'll dance for.

That said, I have seen situations where a dancer simply doesn't like a guy and won't dance for him, but that's a bit different from the scenario you're suggesting.

As I say, that's more of a "courtesan" or escort mentality in my experience.

O.

Of course some dancers will avoid some customers just as some guys avoid some girls. There may be something about the way a customer looks (such as that type of guy never seems to have any money or is rude, or something else she doesn't like). It may or may not be true but if that dancer has experienced it enough, she'll believe it. Some dancers who look very hot are selective with going after regulars first and guys with lots of money to spend. If she thinks you're not willing to pay her dance price, she'll probably avoid you even if she gets time free.

I've had several dancers tell me or show me how they will give me a better lap dance than they'll give to most other guys. I think that is a bit of selection as well. Of course maybe they tell this to a whole lot of guys.

Selection does exist. The dancers are constantly scanning the crowd looking for guys who seem well dressed with money to spend. Start spending the money and they'll come over like flies.

Hi casualguy,

In my experience the money doesn't usually change the game for the selective dancer. I was chatting with one a few days ago. A very pleasant person, but money just doesn't ring her bell. A gentleman was spending $20s like they were $1s and it didn't budge her. Contact didn't seem to bother her in the least. She seemed more interested in playing with the other dancers or the video games than anything else. Who knows when a customers starts spending $100s like they were $1s then that might get her bell ringing.

20 years ago it wasn't abnormal at all for me to meet people who just weren't go go go for money and that included dancers which shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone since they are people too. It almost seemed like an organized campaign that money had to be the number one criteria or goal. In fact laws were passed making it a crime not to view money first under some circumstances.

There is one at the local club I visit who tends to be overly selective which is too bad, because I think she is certainly one of the top 5 stage performers there and should have guys begging for her. I got a private dance from her once, and it was clear she was not enjoying it. The really crappy thing about her is that she only seems to go with the young gangster-wannabe type.

I've also seen some ethnocentric dancers who only seem to prefer their own race or nationality. On the other hand, I knew one black dancer who only danced for white guys (or at least non-black guys).

Over at Angels, ALL the dancers seem to have become selective when it comes to the drooler. He is probably the most pathetic customer I've ever seen. He loves all the dancers regardless of their looks. The fondling and grabbing would be fine, but the drooling all over the dancers has provoked hostility. Very open hostility. I watched security pleading with dancers to give him at least one dance. One of the dancers said to security if you want him to get a dance then you give it to him! Security replied but, I'm not a dancer. She shot back I'm not a dancer either when it comes to him. Let him drool on you and see how it feels. Security apologized to the customer and told him he'd have to wait for a new girl to show.

It also seems to me that each club has sort of developed its own "culture" of selectivity. Girls at the Mons Venus in Tampa, for example, will ask any guy with a pulse that walks thru the door, while at the Flight Club in Detroit, girls seem to target the well-dressed high rollers and leave others behind. Two of the top clubs in the country - yet dancers' attitudes are somewhat different.

David120: I personally like that selectivity. I don't like the idea of being with a dancer that has just been pawed by some scum bucket, lowlife guy. Again, another reason why I like to hit the club early and monopolize a girl before she's been with anyone else. That's made me the "whale" that I am.

Tuesday night I had an outstanding session with a dancer who was frank about the fact that she sought out men with money to dance for. She said that her main screening criteria were age (middle-aged and older); shoes (leather; Aldens, Johnson & Murphys, etc.) and the type of drink the man had (liquor rather than beer). She said that she just can't enjoy dancing for men who seem to hold on tight to a few bucks.

She was a self-admitted materialist, and said that she could be attracted to a rich enough man, even if he was a lot older than her. Her goal is to find a rich man to marry in the next couple of years, and retire from dancing.

Well, I fit the bill for that dancer, except........... the rich part! She'll just have to wait for my class action lawsuit to finalize! :-)

I remember when I found out one guy I was familiar with was a millionaire or close to it. He dressed so poorly whenever I saw him that I thought he must be really scrapping by because he reminded me more of a bum than anything else. My relative told me that he didn't want everyone to know that he had lots of money. I believe he actually owned a clothing store at least I did eventually visit at least one of them. He offered good discounts to people he knew. I'm really not sure how much money he had but he certainly wasn't poor and you would never know it by looking at the way he dressed. If the materialistic dancer saw him, she'd probably walk right by unless she wondered who let the bum in.

I agree some dancers are not as interested in the money or not every night. I've had several experiences with different dancers who preferred to spend their time with me on different nights even though they knew I wasn't going to spend much money on them.

Yes,it happens- for the time that I got on the short end of the stick, see Bones war story thread.// Chitown- well, I meet some of the criteria- I don't wear $300-$400 shoes, but I seem to get same attention in most clubs rather I wear Nike,Rockport, or Florsheim.// CG- Some of the biggest tightwads I've known make 6 figures.

minnow - BINGO! I've been wearing Florsheim shoes for years. I usually buy the Royal Imperial loafers that are made of kangaroo leather. I love the way they mold to my feet, but a bit expensive, so I get them re-soled and re-healed a lot.

Back to the original topic, I see a lot of new young strippers who seem to always hang out with and dance for younger guys. I never thought it was because they selected guys they considered "hot", just that they are more comfortable being with their peers. In time, they either change or leave the biz. I've also known young strippers for whom making money off their peers was the last thing they wanted to be doing.

chander: my ATF confirms your point. You may have figured out that my ATF works in Lansing - a town with a large college nearby. So there are always lots of young (broke) college guys in the crowd. All the new, young strippers do in fact always hang out with the hot, young college guys. I asked my ATF why that is so (because generally there isn't much money to be made)? She agrees with you - they are not being selective, they just don't know how to talk to or relate to the older guys. On the other hand, my ATF, a seasoned pro, targets the older, less attractive guys - the ones willing to have dances, not just tip on stage.

Being a dancer, I have moments when I am selective, and it's moreso the customer and their demeanor and not how much money they are or arent spending. I generally try to avoid the guys that come off as assholes who think we are supposed to paw and beg for their $$$. On the other hand, if I notice a guy, no matter what he looks like, who has been just sitting by himself for a few mins, I will stop by his table and chop it up with him for a while just to make sure he is having a good time.

Once I noticed this guy who had been in the club for about an hour and no one stopped by to at least speak to him. He had a friggid look and came off as a shy, standoff-ish guy. He wasnt very attractive but he wasnt ugly either. He was just an average guy. I stopped by his table and sat down to talk to him and out of the blue he hands me a $100 just for taking the time to acknowledge him. I found out he was in the military, was leaving in three wks to go overseas, and his fam was pretty well off. After that night, he came in every night I worked, until he left, and spent a lot of $$ on me. He also brought in friends a few times before he left who still come into the club although he is overseas now. Similar things have happened with other guys who were just happy someone noticed them and made them have a good time.

I think some dancers forget the fact that one person can either start a buzz or keep people away from the club where you work. So as a way of maybe saying "hey you chose our club, have fun, and hopefully you will come back", I just try to make them feel comfy and welcomed. Just because they may not spend much that particular night doesnt mean they will not come back and spend. I have had many guys come back with friends because I was so nice that they figure most of the girls in our club were the same way and they would spend loads of $$. Afterall, you never know who enters a club and I'm a firm believer in not judging a book by its cover. (or maybe I'm just a happy go lucky person and I like to have happy people around me)