"I don't like to be teased therefore I don't get lapdances"

15 comments

• motorhead

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  17 years ago

  When I'm at a club, I notice that a majority of the guys seem to get at least one or two lap dances over the course of an evening, but there are always a few that never get a dance. I always assumed it was just because they were young guys without a lot of cash -- but I had a dancer tell me basically exactly what you are saying. Some guys just come to look at naked ladies, they DON'T LIKE lap dances. They just end up leaving the club sexually frustrated so they avoid lap dances. Apparently, it is more common than one might think.
• ThisOldManPlayed1

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  17 years ago

  Jpac73 - I know exactly where you're coming from. Many of my friends feel the same way & really have no idea what goes on in SCs nowadays. I believe some guys are intimidated with dancers and SCs in general. SCs have always meant to be "fantasyland" for us guys. We don't necessarily go in for 'sex', but to fulfill a fantasy, and I believe 99% of dancers agreee with the line of thinking. david120 - Same here david, as I see guys get multiple dances and other no LDs, sometimes not even tip the stage dancers (PLs). From recent SC visits, I'm beginning to see less and less guys getting LDs, and instead just sit and drink with a dancer. Could be economics also.
• Jpac73

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  17 years ago

  It could be about money if they were young but these paticular guys were in their mid to late 50's, one has already retired from a previous job. They stated they went a 2 or 3times back in their younger days, but never really fell in love with it.
• FONDL

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  17 years ago

  I think there are a lot of reasons why some guys don't partake of the fun. They don't think it's worth the money or can't afford it. They're intimidated. They're afraid they might have an accident. They don't want to get that intimate with a total stranger. They have an SO and would consider it being unfaithful. They think it's silly. I'm sure there are others. Take your pick.
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  I find the premise of this question kind of amusing. Is there something wrong with guys who choose not to go to strip clubs? I thought we were the ones who are supposed to be screwed up. Like FONDL says, guys go to clubs for all kinds of reasons, so it should come as no surprise that many guys don't see any reason to go. For example, I usually like lap dances and stage tipping, but I don't have much interest in extras. Some guys are indifferent to stage tipping but make extras their holy grail. Then there's a guy who posts here who only enjoys stage dancing at nude clubs, not lap dances. Sometimes, I get bored with the routine of lap dances. I only enjoy them in a strip club. The times I've had a girl try giving me a lap dance in private, it's seemed pointlessly contrived. So I can certainly relate to guys who never have any interest in them. We're all wired differently. Also, at times when I've been in a committed relationship, I've had little interest in lap dances. I only enjoy them when it feels like there's no limit to where it might lead, so when I'm in non-cheating mode, they're not very fun for me. There are many things going on between the ears other than religion that could get in the way. Finally, remember that the vast majority of clubs suck. Odds are, the only experience these guys had was at a crappy strip club, especially if it was decades ago. Based on my early experiences at a few bachelor parties, I thought strip clubs were a complete waste of time, too, until my first exposure to a good, full contact lap dance club. If not for a chance meeting with a hot chick named Stephanie in late 1993, I could still be in their shoes.
• casualguy

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  17 years ago

  I heard the same thing from some other guys many years ago. They didn't want to bother going to a strip club and just get teased. I wouldn't want to bother explaining everything to them either that in some clubs, the teasing is about the same as you could expect in some regular bars or more in some other clubs. I guess for them, they only want to go places where they feel they have a definite shot at going out with every girl in the place and won't get teased or flirted with by any girl who doesn't want to go out with them. I'm not sure who you were referring to as rarely getting lap dances at a nude club but I'm in the same boat there. The lap dance prices are much higher than other clubs down the road and you aren't allowed to do as much touching if any. Why bother in that case? I do try to limit my spending since I'm not Donald Trump. Some of the girls working at the local nude club are like ewww, how she'd get a job here? Any girl who looks very obese not just fat, or very gross and I wouldn't go near them on the street let alone in a strip club, yet there they are in a club. I guess they think they can make more than at Walmart. I think they are wrong and they find out hopefully sooner rather than later. Made me want to leave but some good looking girls got on stage first. I think the guys who used to say they don't like to be teased don't want girls flirting with them unless they can get it on with them. Meanwhile last night, I was teased with a number of girls showing me their pussy, then I was teased with some girls rubbing up against me so close that I could have been poked by a nipple in the eye. I was sitting in my chair and along came a sexy dancer who decided she wanted to do a little bump and grind against my shoulder. Then at another club, I met a few more sexy dancers who really liked to tease me, I just hung onto the handrails so I don't get knocked over by all that teasing. I really do not care for the teasing that includes a tongue in the ear. I can think of a better place for that tongue but I probably need to go out with them for that. :)
• chandler

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  17 years ago

  Just to clarify, the poster I referred to has no interest in topless clubs nor in lap dances anywhere. He only likes going to clubs where he can see a lot of dancers nude onstage. I believe his nickname is Officer.
• casualguy

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  17 years ago

  I enjoy seeing nude dancers onstage. I think money is a factor here. I think what some dancers do on stage is teasing as well. The lap dances in some clubs aren't much different than what you see at the stage. It just costs 20 to 40 times as much. Maybe you should just call him smart.
• lopaw

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  17 years ago

  In some of the smaller, divier places I frequent, it really is all about the money. These kind of clubs draw in a primarily blue-collar crowd, and many day laborers. When the dance prices recently went from $10 to $20 a pop, many folks walking in with $20 in their pockets probably decided that it would last a lot longer being spent on a pitcher of beer & some stage tips than 1 lapdance. It's not uncommon to stop by on a Friday night and the place is packed - full of people drinking and watching, but not much activity in the lapdance area.
• DandyDan

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  17 years ago

  I have to agree with Jpac on this. Most of the people I work with think it is all a tease. They don't mind going to the club, mind you, they just don't like lapdances. They'd rather just drink beer than get any lapdances. Then again, they probably wouldn't bring a whole lot of money with them to the club such that they could get one. Oh, they might tip the stage dancer and get dollar dances, but lapdances are out of the question. One other thing about some of the smaller divier places such that lopaw visits, they typically don't have the high ranking girls, so even if people are prepared to spend money, they don't for the lack of high quality women. And the one you want to get one from is always busy. At least that is my observation of the typical stripclub goer.
• DougS

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  17 years ago

  Thinking back on when I first started going to SCs, it was actually fear that kept me from getting dances. I didn't know what to expect, to I was afraid of the unknown, basically. It seems downright silly, now. I was always with a group of guys and a part of me was afraid that I'd be seen "pitching a tent", or worse, with a wet spot. Finally, a vendor had taken me and a co-worker to a Pacers game in Indy, then took us to a SC. At the club, he talked to a dancer and gave her money to give my friend a dance. I looked at it almost as if he was "hazing" my friend. I felt sorry for my friend and at the same time was breathing a sigh of relief that I'd been spared by not having a dance bought for me. (can you believe that?!) Upon my friend's return, he had a sheepish look on his face, and proceded to talk the vendor into buying ME a dance. The vendor picked out a huge titted blonde - one that I wasn't the least bit attracted to - and gave her money, and grabbing my hand she dragged me back to a couch area. Oh the embarrassment! There was very little contact allowed, but she straddled me and grinded a bit, then she took my finger and licked and sucked on it, while moaning. I was thinking, "Damn! this is pretty hot... she actually acts like she likes this!" To keep this long story from getting much longer, at that moment, I decided that I kind'a liked getting lap dances. So began my clubbing ways. I have a close friend (another co-worker - different job) that I've dragged to clubs a few times, while on business trips together. He definitely shares my girl-crazy attitude, but he very rarely partakes in the dances. He can't get past the thought that there is a possibility of getting germs / STDs, etc. I'm working on him, though. [wink]
• motorhead

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  17 years ago

  Doug, I can somewhat relate to your early fear of getting dances. I was never afraid of getting a lap dance, but I was hesitant of going into a private VIP room for the first time. Like you, I didn't know what to expect. I'm not normally into finding girls that provide extras, so yes, I was a little afraid of what went on in private. I was relieved to discover that the occurrences of sex with a total stranger in the VIP are probably overstated.
• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  Sometimes (back to the subject line topic) I wonder why I'm interested in lappers. I think of myself as someone who hates to be teased-but-not-pleased, yet I really enjoy the "pleasing" aspects of a lap dance. I don't think of it as, somehow, a prelude to going home to the missus (I don't have a missus at home anyway) or in any other way a "beneficial tease." But I do have to admit, a lap-dance that does not lead to coitus is, indeed, by some definitions, a tease-without-please. So, I don't know how I work inside my own purdy li'l head, I guess ...
• casualguy

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  17 years ago

  I remember when someone first dragged me to a strip club I was in my 20's and really did not know what went on there. I was wondering if BJ's were common but didn't ask who I was with for fear of sounding silly. I went with them and was pleasantly surprised. The only sexual thing I saw were some naked tits on stage during a dancers second or third song on stage. The table dances were pretty much air dances but the dancer was only standing a few feet away instead of 10 to 30 feet away as she could be on stage. There wasn't anything to be concerned about. All the stories you may read about on a site like this are the exception for the majority of strip club visits. It really is just a big tease but for a guy who enjoys visual stimulation, it's not so bad a tease.
• Book Guy

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  17 years ago

  Sounds like a lame strip club, Casualguy. You need to find a "real" one where something a lot more than "naked tits on stage" is the STARTING line.