How to say no to your regular stripper

You gonna get a lot of “be direct” advice aka just tell them straight up you would like to give other dancers a spin. If you throw a dance their way every now and then they will likely understand and still appreciate you. For the more possessive ones yeah you may just have to pick one way or the other.

To me though having a multiple regular relationships with dancers is going to cost an obscene amount of money. But maybe your killing it out there.

Don't be a Pussy (trying to avoid to not hurt their feeling) and just be honest, you want to check out the other dancers.

I don’t have any advice but in a similar situation, so would like to hear what others say. Muddy9, Realized too late that you are correct

That’s why I am reluctant to label a customer as “my regular”. I don’t want them to feel no kind of way about moving on.

I think moving forward you should let dancers know that you make rounds. Don’t scope them out every time you come.

You have to be direct with ya old friends, because it’s a part of the game. Tip them a $5 and send them on their way. After awhile they will figure it’s not worth it to approach you.

I'm in the "just let them know you're looking to mix it up today" camp. I've never had an issue.

But, be careful what you wish for. Often, dancers treat regular/loyal customers much better than random dudes. Your regular girls may drop service a notch or two if you start playing the field. It really depends what you want out of the experience, maybe that's not an issue.

^ That’s true. I wouldn’t give the same amount of attention if a customer is seeking someone else. In fairness why should I. But again it is part of the game.

It’s an interesting problem. I sort of like the idea of seeing only one dancer every time I go to the strip club. We get to know each other and build up some trust. Unfortunately in my area there seems to be a shelf life to dancers and they disappear after a period of time. So I have to find the next one.

This is a complete non-issue. The only place where it's an issue is in your head.

I walk in, big smile and hug, "hey Porsche, good to see you! I'm just doing dances today with the new girl, but catch you next time?". If you act scared, they'll try to intimidate you or make you feel guilty. Act 100% confident and like you're not doing anything wrong -- which you're not -- and you'll see there are no repercussions.

But do agree with Dolfan -- regulars do get YMMV treatment, and that might dry up. But since you're looking to move on anyway, who cares?

Or you could just hit a bunch of different clubs and maintain a cf in each one, that’ll take care of the problem you created by being a weak type. I never have a problem because I’m always straightforward about my interest and have no problem telling ginger that tonight is Bambi’s but we will still hang another time.

Be polite but be assertive and confident.

A few times I've told especially clingy dancers that I am the customer and I get to choose what I want to do. I doesn't usually make them feel any better, but they don't have a comeback.

Step 1 is to grow some balls (perhaps your wife took them in the divorce-settlement IDK).

Trying to appease dancers is usually counter-productive in a strip-club; one has to have a spine - a salesperson's job is to try and get you for the most they can; not to worry if you can afford it or not nir even if you really want the service - nobody is gonna look out for your best interest in the club except you - what you're doing by not being assertive is basically encouraging them and giving them an unlimited-leash - you will enjoy yourself and your visits more being in control of the visit.

Reality is they don't give a flying-fuck about you other than the $$$ they get from you; no matter how much they seem to really "be happy to see you" - if you didn't have anymore $$$ they would not struggle dropping you ASAP - you don't owe them anything other than treating them fairly when they are entertaining you (and vise-versa) - it's business not an f'ing marriage so why allow yourself ro be treated as if you were their strip-club husband.

Dancers know how to manipulate custies; it's basically how they make their $$$ - it's up to you to see that and not allow yourself to be "claimed".

Dancers know custies wanna play the field; it's not news to them nor will they feel "hurt" other than not liking they can no longer raid your wallet.

Yes - regulars often get better treatment but not uncommon for some dancers to become lazy and complacent with custies they feel worship the ground they walk on.

IMO a regular will always be a regular in the context she already knows you - IME dancers that that I've stopped getting with often seem to try harder "to get me back" and also try harder if I get back with them in "order to keep me" - may not apply to all dancers but it's been mostly the case for me.

This is a good TUSCL article written by an experienced SCer about strip-clubbing 101:

/article.php

I should refresh that article with a paragraph on "what do I do if I have a regular girl but want to play the field", in the Don'T Be a Little Bitch section...

You have a mouth, use it. Just tell them to excuse you for a bit, that you want to get dances from "so and so" and be on your way.

===> "I should refresh that article with a paragraph on "what do I do if I have a regular girl but want to play the field", in the Don'T Be a Little Bitch section..."

While you're at it, you may want to modify the "Don't be an asshole" section with a non-San Francisco version. In some places, if you don't show a little grit up front, the girl will assume that you're prey. That nice middle path you no doubt envision in your head just doesn't exist in some places. It's almost always better to be viewed as a mild form of asshole than any type of bitch.

@subraman be sure to add a chapter about team winning team, and how pimps like us make our CFs pay for us to get dances from the other girls we want to try out;)

25: Rule #3: On being on a winning team, behaving like a bad boy (starting with Axe body spray), and offering your management services.

Check and check

Rick, I gotcha, you've been saying that for a bit. My "don't be an asshole" has worked for me in SF, but also other places I've SCed recently like Phoenix and even Vegas. But maybe there's a "sprinkling of assholiness" we all subconsciously develop, but I definitely don't consciously show "a little grit" until she does something to trigger it, and then it's often a one-strike-you're-out dismissal from the table.

I have had two situations where I was ready to move on and the stripper wasn’t. first time it was sort of a dive bar. Dancers were a little older which I don’t mind, at my age they all look young to me. One dancer approached me she gave me good milage in the VIP area and discounts for multiple dances. I came back to this club every chance I got to get dances from her. But she got pretty needy. She would text me and beg me to come to the club and when I did she would hound me for more dances more drinks. I just stopped going to that club and moved on eventually she stopped texting me.
Second situation dancer that gave really nice dances and I enjoyed her company, became a full time bartender. She said she could still give dances but it would cost double since she would have to reimburse the bouncer to tend bar. There was absolutely no room for negotiations. I took another dancer for a dance and when I walked back by the bar she shot daggers out of her eyes at me. No way was I going to get another drink at that club I would worry she would put something in it. I don’t go to that club right now either.

IMO a seasoned SCer; particularly a TUSCL educated one; can pretty-easily see thru the BS and doesn't necessarily have to put on a "dont' fuck w/ me" face - seasoned SCers can usually see the hustle and SS right-away and know not how to get suckered - often times I play dumb and give a hustler enough rope to hang herself.

I think Subraman's "being direct with a smile" is the most-effective way - getting upset/angry and/or confrontational probalby makes one look weak in her eyes where she would double-down on the SS - I must admit though that although I know better, my low EQ often takes over when a dancer is hustling me and I'll sometimes get pissy even though I know better (but def much better these days than when I was a less-experienced SCer).

IMO many dancers try to use the "gentleman card" where they know the avg SCer is conditioned by society to always be polite to a woman and not say no (or at least try to be accommodating) - many dancers use this to sink their teeth into the wallet of an inexperienced SCer.

An SCer should constantly remind himself that the visit is about him, not her - she's there to please the customer and accomodate him; not the other way around; that's why she's getting compensated (and often well) - it's business - if one is contantly trying to get the dancers "to like you" then one will often get taken advantage of (SCing is often cutthroat and many dancers will use w/e angle they can to get what they want).

A SCer should always remind himself - "it's about me" - doesn't mean one screws over a dancer - just means the visit should go according to your likes and wants; not the dancers' likes and wants - there are def dancers that try to earn their $$$ by showing the custy the best time possible; but there are many that just care about what's best for them and what's best for them is usually the opposite of what's best for you.

===> "Getting upset/angry and/or confrontational probalby makes one look weak in her eyes..."

Not that I would care what she thought if I didn't like her, but did anybody suggest doing this? I'm in the direct with a smile camp myself - I'm not emotionally invested enough to get upset in a strip club. But the rest of that stuff, like don't brush her off, don't ask her personal questions, have a permission dialogue when touching her, ugh.

If a pig approaches me, I send her away before she can get 10 words out of her mouth. I don't have the patience to bother with a girl who is too old, fat or ugly to be taking her clothes off for a living.

If a girl asks me personal questions (and they almost all do), you bet I'm going to ask in kind. I get some of my best targeting intel this way.

And in those rare instances where I end up in a back room with a girl, you better believe I'm going to see where I can take it. Though this is uncommon.

I'll also add that I have a somewhat thick northeast accent and can have loud moments after a few pops. It's all part of the authentic simple man charm. But in dealing with me, girls learn very quickly that I have zero tolerance for silliness - usually without being told.

I've taken countless girls OTC from numerous clubs in 14 different states doing what I do, so I'm pretty comfortable in my approach. Most of these girls didn't grow up coddled and pampered with white collar parents - they grew up surrounded by rough and tumble types and it's what they're comfortable with. Like I said boys, a little grit goes a long way if you have any.

I have a few places that the girls will all come over to me as soon as I walk in. I will always buy them a drink and then go to the restroom, come back out and find a dancer to talk to. I just go up to the new dancer and start talking. It’s that simple. I have purposely made SCing into an experience where I am a 3 times VIP and done if I like them. One time VIP and done if I don’t. I guess that means that I simply do not have any “favorites”. I know that this is all fantasy and I go into the SC with the mindset of enjoying a night of fantasy. My fantasy is to hang out with, talk to and feel up beautiful women without them outwardly thinking I’m a pervert; I don't give a shit what they really think, just so long as my play fantasy is fun.

Say “I’m good right now” firmly and carry on about your visit. As Papi shared, it’s about you. I, personally, talk to strippers and let them know how full of shit they are and no need to lie. If I’m interested, I’ll call them.

Rick Boy Douchebag: " It's all part of the authentic simple man charm. But in dealing with me, girls learn very quickly that I have zero tolerance for silliness."

I guess the Douchebag thinks "authentic simple man charm" requires dressing up in a suit an pretending to be a chemical engineer. /discussion.php Any dancer subjected to the Douchebag's "charms" would have to have an extremely high tolerance for silliness to put up with him.

"I'm not emotionally invested enough to get upset in a strip club." This is the guy who talks about wanting to assault customers for smoking cigars and ambushing them in the restroom for some strange reason, and who threatened to "fuck me up" because he didn't like one of my reviews. I wonder what he would be like if he did get emotionally invested?

===> "Any dancer subjected to the Douchebag's "charms" would have to have an extremely high tolerance for silliness to put up with him."

^ I guess a number of them must then girly man. As far as the rest, stop whining already. It makes you look even more girly than your made up dancer friend profiles, which btw is weird as all get out.

Notice he doesn't contest anything I said? Of course, how could he? It's all in the TUSCL record.

As for my "made up dancer friend profiles," well why don't you explain what the hell you're talking about, Douchebag? (Hint: it's just a part of the fantasy world he lives in.)

^He caught on to us, docE. I am just but a lady boy. And you and every other TUSCLer who has met me in person who could say otherwise are secretly working for Baby Dolls and writing shill reviews.

Smash that like button!

Damn! Wrong account!

Perhaps the most important word for an SCer is "no" and being comfortable using it - o/w often times one's visit won't be as good as they could/should be

Some good advice above.

Another option is to ask the girl sitting with you, the one you don't want dances from, what she can tell you about the hot new dancer you are interested in. Direct and unambiguous.

Tell them you'd love ro get with them but you are currently going thru another of your herpes outbreaks

I once told a dancer I liked "I'm ready for some variety. Who would you recommend?" She knew I would like a little more than she usually offered. She introduced me to another dancer saying, "He's a good guy. Treat him right." The new dancer wasted no time putting her hand down my pants. When it was all over, I tipped the first dancer for the recommendation.

Papi Chulo and Subraman have some great posts scattered around TUSCL that put together would make a great PL Bible. Maybe with a foreword by Rick. Maybe.

===> "Papi Chulo and Subraman have some great posts scattered around TUSCL that put together would make a great PL Bible. Maybe with a foreword by Rick. Maybe."

LOL. A "PL Bible" indeed, with ample stories of ethically sourced LDs and stripper attention. We might even occasionally read how the good guy who isn't remotely an a-hole and never pushes any boundary or comfort zone reap the rewards from their pious behavior. It will be a real tear jerker for sure.

But as great as it will no doubt be, I just couldn't in all conscience agree to provide the foreword as I'm just not the right person for it. If my books was visible in the same stripper section of the same bookstore, it would have a title something like "Daddy Dugan's Guide To Making Naughty Girls A Little Naughtier." 😉

No criticism in any of that. We all do what works for each of us.

I already wrote the forward for the Douchebag’s book. Here it is: /discussion.php

^ I knew a comment from troll girl was inevitable after that post. 😀

So Ricky Boy Douchebag likes to start shit, puts me on ignore, reads my posts offline anyway, and then sends notes through third parties like a 13-year old girl, but I'm the "troll girl."/discussion.php Nice fantasy world you've got there Douchebag. Are you off your meds again?

^ Of course I put you on ignore. You've been following me around the board for months posting the same goofy satirical thread. Every once in a while I make the mistake of responding. You used to be a contributing member, but sadly now you're just an Internet troll.

Forget saying no to your favorite stripper. Some of you should be saying no to your Post Your Comment button 🤣🤣🤣

^ LOL for sure 😂

“Every once in a while I make the mistake of responding.” “Every once in a while”—that’s pretty funny Douchebag.

I can’t say that I’ve had this problem yet. The only “regular stripper” I’ve had is the one who was my “wingman” on my first extras trip.

I don’t think I’ve gotten “dances” from the same girl twice in a row since then.

there’s a few girls I’ve had seconds from... and even thirds...

If she knew you were low on cash or broke, she would not worry about passing you by. This is not high school dating. It's a business and your dollars rule.

One of the rules I keep for myself in the club that saves me from being bored of a specific girl is to always escalate every meeting with her. If the first time I meet her I get to touch her breasts, then the second meeting I'm touching her pussy. The third meeting I'm sucking titties. The fourth we're kissing, the fifth we're making out while she stick shifts me, the sixth we're doing it OTC. I might push things slower than this but typically I'm not going to be doing the same thing with the same girl more than once. There will always be something new added on every time I see her. She's within her rights to stop the escalation at any point and that's where the relationship ends. It's nice and clean break and she knows what she needs to do to restart it if she ever wants more money from me.

The benefit to me is she's always exciting to see again because I'm going to get more from her than some random new girl. If I have to choose between only touching her titties and touching the titties of a new girl, the new girl is always going to be more exciting. But if she also offers touching of her pussy in addition to the titties, she might be more exciting than the new girl. In this way, I never get bored and she has a constant regular spending money on her. When the relationship ends, I get to move on to other, younger girls and leave the relationship with a nice, happy, fulfilling memory.

I was once kinda in your shoes. If I told her That I wanted to see what a dance from the new girl was like I got the evil eye. It got to were no other girls would even ask me for a dance or to buy them a drink. I felt like a walking ATM at times. I knew that if her pissed her off it may ruin the only club that I go to. I know the that I screwed up and got feeling for a stripper, But I know that she only had feeling for my wallet. I use to get the text form her telling me that I miss you so much and I want to see you. Finally I grew some balls and text her back asking why do you only miss me when your at work and not on your days off ? Beside I spent to much money in there last night. ( I lied. I did not go in the night be for ) She ask who all I got dances from and I told her I don't kiss and tell. That drove her nuts. The next few visits was awkward. I did get the best lap dance ever from a pissed off striper trying to win my money back. She eventually found a new sucker and I got to move on.

I broke off a possessive dancer situation by telling her “if I wanted to fuck the same girl every night, I would be home with my wife - instead of in here”.

-->"I was once kinda in your shoes. If I told her That I wanted to see what a dance from the new girl was like I got the evil eye. It got to were no other girls would even ask me for a dance or to buy them a drink. I felt like a walking ATM at times. I knew that if her pissed her off it may ruin the only club that I go to. I know the that I screwed up and got feeling for a stripper, But I know that she only had feeling for my wallet. I use to get the text form her telling me that I miss you so much and I want to see you. Finally I grew some balls and text her back asking why do you only miss me when your at work and not on your days off ? Beside I spent to much money in there last night. ( I lied. I did not go in the night be for ) She ask who all I got dances from and I told her I don't kiss and tell. "

Speed, just to keep pounding the point home, it's great that you finally broke your chains. But the better path is to not let her put those chains on you in the first place. You don't magically get to a place where she can control you through via stink eye, or feels entitled to ask you any questions she wants. The process of a 20-year-old in her underwear, completely dominating you, is progressive. It's a pattern you might not have noticed, but she took more and more control and as you submitted to each act, she escalated -- and then next thing you know, your only way out is to send cringy texts like "why do you only miss me when your at work". Take control of the customer/stripper relationship from the start, don't let her cross your boundaries, don't submit to her acts of domination, ensure she understands that things should be win-win here, don't be the type of little bitch who considers any sort of fantasy hustle on her part as "stripper shit".

I would imagine most of us, when we started strip clubbing, ended up in the situation you seem to keep ending up in, so it's not like it's uncommon. Hell, when I made my transition from variety guy to ATFer, I think it took me a few years to understand and break the pattern (slow learner, I guess!), and it was watching another regular who also had CFs but had somehow wired things up so that he was completely free to get dances however he wanted, that made me realize I was doing things wrong.

One thing I’ve done a few times when they became clingy and possessive was I went in and invited another girl to join us, I know it seems kind of a dick move to you @Subraman, but it had the desired effect, and now the one I did this to most recently, is sweeter than sugar, when I’m in the club and she knows if she starts being a bitch, that I always have options.

One thing I do from time to time is to bitch-slap her for no reason just to make sure she doesn't get out of line - has been very-successful so far

Or, you could just be a man and tell her to go away or that you want to try different girls or talk to someone else.

^ yeah but that's kinda hard for most PLs (since we're PLs)

@Papi has the bitch slap thing worked well ima try that at some point.

^ very well- key is to not let her see it coming and bam backhand all up in her grill

^ I like it open or closed hand ?

^ I personally start with an open-hand and progress if necessary but the open-hand usually suffices

Thanx for the information 😂

^ PLs gotta help PLs

This is some good stuff, I was confused as to whether backhand or forehand is best. I could also use my pointers on my drug game -- what drugs should I get my stripper addicted to, what's the best way to manipulate her once I've achieved that outcome --, if anyone can help a PL out

^ This is TWT stuff only for the Florida TWT you cali guys need to listen when we dropping knowledge

East coast vs west coast, beef back on! Tupac!

^I’m wit Biggie and Death Row mofo

^ You’d best keep your head on a swivel ^

Eastside Crips nigga

Laugh if you want but being direct works the best. You'll get more respect and self respect for it too.

www.youtube.com

^^^^^^ A-town Miserable Socially Isolated Troll Locos representing!

Not really. I'm doing well.

^ I’ll bet you are for a bottom feeder

No, I'm pretty up there.

Up where, I guess the street is a step up from the sewer 😂

nah I have a 2 bedroom townhouse.

First and most important, east coast representing right here. Fresh off the hook. Word is bond. I was a teenager when all this was fresh so I can go 90s thug talk all day muthafuckas.

Secondly, I solved my regular problem by just taking a little break from main place and visiting some new clubs. I’m enjoying the variety and seeing how it’s done else where and I’m thinking a little time to cool things is good. And when I get the urge to go to my regular place, I’ll just be polite but up front.

Oh so thats why you attack me, coz you're a little bitch who can't just tell a bitch you want to spend time with another bitch coz yous a bitch lmfao

You actually stopped going to a club coz you can't tell a stripper hoe to go away so you can talk to other stripper hoes and I'm the woman???? ROTFLMFAO

A lot of PLs are defensive about dancers approaching them b/c as I previously posted too-many dancers in too-many clubs don't respect a custy's space and/or time - as I've posted in the past, I feel the M.O. in clubs should be for dancers to ask if the custy would like company but in too many clubs this is not the case - I feel if it's a club where a dancer does not respect my space and/or time then I don't feel I owe her my time nor convo.

It often feels uncomfortable and awkward when a dancer plumps herself on you that you have no interest in and she tries to "seduce you" while you have no interest.

Papi Chulo, that's exactly the time where you tell her you're not interested right away.... its that simple. I've had girls just sit on my lap or force themselves on me and I tell them I'm not interested in their company. Some get offended, some beg for a tip, some get bitchy, some refuse to leave so I just ignore them, but the vast majority just goes away without wasting either of our times.

Icey I replied to this on the other thread

Good day sir.

In person you'd run to another place rather than face me lmfao