Speaking of getting in contact with prior girls I've known...
JeffTUSCL
California
The one I reached out to today on IG is still a wanna-be model, same as when I met her. She gets some paying gigs but nothing really big. No idea how she pays her bills. She is hot as fuck, perfect thin body, classy appearance, one of the best looking girls I ever spent time with. Nice personality, no drama beyond typical 20-something stuff. I was hoping she would jump on any chance to make some extra $$ but I didn't say anything about it, just reached out to first politely say hello and bring it up after. She claimed I must have confused her with someone else LOL nope but I get it, it's her polite way back to shut my re-pursuit down but I did jog her memory after 1 more message with a mild reminder and she got all flustered about me contacting her on IG. It's not like she has an agency managing it, it's obviously her useless personal account.
Kind of a shame, she looks even better now than when I first met her. Odds of me re-sparking something was low but I had to at least try.
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How did you find their instagram or FB account? If she did not give her account you should not contact her through IG or FB? They will get scared.
She might have retired from dancing and got a day job.Who knows. Usually young hot chicks like her work only couple years as dancers to test waters.They cannot cope up with the stress and schedule. So they move on.
After you reminded her, what was her response ? She did not want to meet you?
She gave me plenty of her contact details in the past, but it was a few years since we spoke and the contact methods I had at this point didn't work but finding her was easy since we know our names and she uses her full name as her IG name. I wasn't asking to meet her, I just sent her a message to say hi and see how she's been doing.
I think she probably doesn't want a current boyfriend to stumble on DMs like that based on her responses. I wasn't explicit, I only responded with enough for her recollection. The point of the post was the disappointment of not being able to re-spark any traction. I have had some girls change phones and initially tell me "wrong number" when testing them after a gap of 2 months, but turn it around when the obvious confusion is cleared up. This instance was years so very slim chance but worth a shot as she's stunning.
If I consistently see the same girl for a very long time, weekly if possible, at some point it has nearly perpetual motion even with big time gaps. If I see a girl sporadically or only a short time and a similar time gap happens, then it takes some work to regain traction and the longer time passes the more effort it takes and at some point no amount of effort works.
Dynamically, the same type of girl with the same lifestyle will have a certain perception of the need of a relationship and the willingness to let go, like any addiction. If a girl has enough time pass where her life goes on as usual then it is reinforced to her that she doesn't need you. If you continuously see a girl, whether she needs you or not, she will perceive that she does need you.
I do believe that any girl can get by in life without any help from anyone, it is just a matter of her willingness. The need for p4p or SD or whatever the dynamic is a mental cocoon. It is a choice and that choice can either be made over & over which builds one belief system or it can be cut out for long enough to form a new belief system.
Obviously the same choice can be made on our end. I don't need any of this, but I am continuously choosing it. The break may happen when I run out of options and need to go cold turkey for some length of time long enough to get past withdrawal.
Too funny.
If I get any sort of communication that is uncomfortable like that, I block the person in every way I can think of.
This is the mindset of “Well I had to ask!” Meaning, you had nothing to lose and only (in your mind) potential gain, where you have made the other person uncomfortable/compromised in some way. No sweat off your back, right?? Her new bf that she really likes might be sitting next to her on the couch and see the messages and call it off. No sweat off your back though, you had to ask.
You’re RIGHT, Jeff! Since you haven’t been in her life in YEARS, she is probably the exact same person and you know everything that’s going on with her so feel free to just tread carelessly all over her inbox! Looks like ya did, good work buddy.
Keep up the manners and etiquette, it is hard to see why you are losing contact and then later having little success in fusing those very old connections.
If there was no merit to my points you might not be so defensive. Best of luck, Jeff!
SJG
The mistress is not a whore, but she is not a wife either.
Never liked the idea of Sugar Baby.
SJG
Better not call those plumber numbers on the fridge that haven't been called in 5 years, either! They might not be in the business and might have moved onto the true life they wanted to lead: cabaret dancer. Saver instead to scour the phone book for random new plumbers.