Friending a dancers on social media?

avatar for PaulDrake
PaulDrake
Off again on again PL
So recently my ATF offered to be friends with me on social media. I pretty quickly politely declined (to which she seemed surprised and a little miffed). Although I would love to do it the risk seems too great considering I am married. I don't want her to know my last name, I don't want other dancers in the club to even know my real first name, and I don't think giving a stripper potential access to possibly directly contact my wife is a good idea. On the other hand I am probably being a little too cautious, I have been seeing this ATF for almost a year so she has earned a good bit of trust.

Has anyone ever had a good/bad experience friending a dancer on social media?

33 comments

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avatar for playfulsteve
playfulsteve
6 years ago
I have multiple social media accounts for such purposes that aren’t linked. One for mongering and one for regular use. No issues, makes it easy to keep in contact with the regulars (and enjoy the daily
Eye candy from them)
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
I was probably stupid in friending my ATF on a social media account, but i did it and nothing negative (so far). In retrospect i wouldn't recommend it.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
6 years ago
Many of my past faves are FB friends....I love looking at THEIR friends and seeing who I know!
avatar for Vantablack
Vantablack
6 years ago
I'm friends with my ATF on every social media. She knows both my real first and last name and I know hers as well. I guess it's only a problem if you're trying to hide it from somebody. I don't have a wife nor do I have a girlfriend so I don't have to hide anything from my ATF.
avatar for NJBalla
NJBalla
6 years ago
The mind game people play on facebook and instagram these days is no less different than a strip club. I saw go for it
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
6 years ago
NJBalla: Only if a dancer type account. All of my dancer FB friend's pages make no mention what they do for a living.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
6 years ago
I don’t do much social media, so there’s not much on my fb. If you are married - and your spouse doesn’t know about your habit, it’s best to keep your social media away from strippers.

However, after seeing several dancers Instagram accounts (thanks to Juice), they have everything in one place.

But, since you have more to lose with a wife and family, it’s best to be safe and secure.
avatar for azdd
azdd
6 years ago
Yeah, I recommend serious caution. If you have hundreds of friends on FB, it might be OK, but it depends on how racy your dancer’s page is. FB has a lot of privacy settings where you can select who can see your friends list, and anybody’s posts. The problem is that it seems every time FB updates their program, everything switches back to public mode and you have to reset your privacy settings. If your wife is reviewing your friends list, she’s already suspicious. I say either don’t risk it, or set up separate accounts from your real life. I have one FB friend out of hundreds that is a retired dancer, but her page is very ordinary, doesn’t say anything about stripping, and she’s married. It’s nice trading PMs once in awhile since I never see her anymore. So far no problem, but I would not take the risk with an active dancer. Interestingly, my ATF has zero social media presence, so not an issue with her.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
6 years ago
You're not being too cautious for a married man.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
I have many stripper contacts on LinkedIn because im trying to become a pee troll.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
6 years ago
There is a simple way to look at this - as you can ask yourself -

What good might come from sharing my social media account with a stripper?

Then weigh what negative shit might come from sharing. I’m guessing the negative shit outweighs the positive.
avatar for justaguy79
justaguy79
6 years ago
Just make a fake account.
avatar for Timbuck12
Timbuck12
6 years ago
You’re married? Dude why are you even asking the question. Hell no don’t do it.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
My FB, snapchat, instagram, are all strippers, SBs, FBSM girls, etc. So, no worries about anyone in my real life seeing them :)

It can be pretty fun, even incredibly fun, to be on a stripper's snapchat (and Instagram, and to a far lesser extent, facebook), and worth starting up your own stripper-only facebook account. With the caveat that facebook digs deep into your contacts to make connections -- there's a real chance that if you run the facebook app on your phone, it will figure out the connection between both your accounts and your stripper, which means your stripper might find your real account
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
Very interesting to follow up on strippers 10-20 years after I knew them. They seem to tend to marry or pair up with so-so looking blue collar workers, in most cases. Lots of divorces.
avatar for PaulDrake
PaulDrake
6 years ago
@Timbuck12 - I am not asking for advice. Already made my decision. Just thought this would be a good discussion topic as the forum seems a little dead today. I think nicespice must be sick as the trolls are all quiet.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
6 years ago
If you allow any aspect of this hobby to infect your real life Paul you're insane. I make a decent living off people who trust others. Why set yourself up for blackmail or just a random chance somehow she's friends with people you know.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
6 years ago
If you are married, I think you are absolutely insane to friend a stripper to your real account. Even if your wife isn’t on social media, even if you “trust” the stripper, who is to say some shit doesn’t go down one day.

Divorced, or single? Then go for it, everyone already assumes you’re a perv anyway.
avatar for grand1511
grand1511
6 years ago
My CF popped up on my page a couple months ago as a suggested FB friend. Found out her real name. I had no intention of friending her but made a passing comment that I saw her of FB the next time I was in the club. She didn't even let me finish my thought before she started saying she doesn't friend customers. It was pretty funny.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
6 years ago
I have two alternate FB accounts I use for keeping contact with dancers. One of them I make no bones about being me to the girls. The other is a stealth account. Lots of common friends between the two.

My ATF is friends on my real account. I asked her to so she’d know if anything ever happened to me that might prevent me from contacting her.

I long ago forbade *any* social media app or web site access to my contacts. Hopefully, that’s enough.
avatar for NJBalla
NJBalla
6 years ago
@rockstar to clarify, people present a very distorted view of themselves on social media these days (facebook, instagram, twitter). Its very similar to the mind game that dancers play when you get in a club. The best way to know someone is offline and out of public view
avatar for LinzeeDet
LinzeeDet
6 years ago
Make a separate account n then u dont gotta worry about it...

I encourage everyone I meet to add my Instagram cuz I post my work schedule, travel schedule and promote my pay site there as well as post sexy (and random) pics!

I have separate accounts for my regular life aka things my family and non-industry friends.

Linzeedet on insta
Linzee Detroit on facebook
Linzeedetroit on patreon

:)
avatar for Vantablack
Vantablack
6 years ago
@Cashman

If you and your ATF have more than just an ITC/P4P relationship then I don't see a problem with it. You can be friends with a dancer as you would with any other person you might meet out on the streets.
avatar for mal_hodgson
mal_hodgson
6 years ago
I’m married and I first connected to my ATF on SnapChat. I wasn’t on it yet so I made a new account with an obvious fake name and she friended me. I was surprised that she actually had her real name as her SnapChat name. Being inquisitive I had discovered her FaceBook and Instagram accounts before the day was over. After almost 2 months she admitted she had tried to look me up (using the bogus name which she thought was real) and hadn’t found a thing about me. By then I trusted her so I let her know my real name and we became friends on Instagram and FB also. She also knows where I live now and has been over a couple times and I know where she lives. We live VERY close to each other by the way and I more worried that I will run into her with my wife in the real world than I am that she will find her on social media (My wife isn’t on Social Media at all.)

What is interesting is my ATF unfriended me on FB because her boyfriend had access to her account and was always checking her friend list.
avatar for BigPimp69
BigPimp69
6 years ago
All my hoes follow me on all my social media
avatar for TrapBaby304
TrapBaby304
6 years ago
its not a big deal
avatar for BigPimp69
BigPimp69
6 years ago
“I think nicespice must be sick as the trolls are all quiet.”

Naw she ‘aight. Gotta put my hoes to work.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
-->"her boyfriend had access to her account and was always checking her friend list."

I've had one stripper like that, ultra-controlling, ultra-jealous (and rightfully so, I was fucking his girl OTC) boyfriend, super toxic relationship. It's just as well you don't end up involved in whatever drama they have
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
6 years ago
Vantablack - I think it’s fine for a single or divorced guy to do that. But for a married guy - whose wife doesn’t know about his mongering - there’s a big risk.

If he has a separate phone for mongering - that would be better. It’s important to be safe - as Facebook definitely mines your interactions - and when his list of suggested friends becomes filled with strippers - that might cause an issue.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
-->"If he has a separate phone for mongering - that would be better. It’s important to be safe - as Facebook definitely mines your interactions - and when his list of suggested friends becomes filled with strippers - that might cause an issue."

Exactly what I was saying. And if you're worried about anonymity, the reverse is true, too -- she'll eventually get a friend suggestion of his real facebook. Even if facebook doesn't have access to your contacts, I'm guessing that if you access both accounts from the same phone, it can tell those accounts are from the same IP address some of the time, and connect them. Just guessing; all I know is, these social media apps, and communication apps like WhatsApp, Voxer, Kik, seem to be incredibly aggressive at finding connections.
avatar for Warrenboy75
Warrenboy75
6 years ago
Also for those that don't know FB owns Instagram. So understand that while you may not see it at first if you log in to one or the other with the same account information you'll start to see the overflow on both social media accounts.
avatar for Daddillac
Daddillac
6 years ago
I would not tell them a real name.... I was with my whore for 18 months, she got pissed when I found out she was an escort. We were not friends on facebook but she messaged a ton of my family to tell them I was fucking hookers..... I really don't give a shit but bitches are crazy, especially that whore
avatar for aham5
aham5
6 years ago
First of all, assume that all strippers are crazy and unpredictable.
If you have a job, wife, or even a mother - dont give dancers your real social media or real phone number for god’s sake.

If you dont have a second account..... get one. Stripper Snap chat and instagram is always good for a laugh. If you thought you heard a lot of stripper drama at the club., just wait until you see what they do on social media. Don’t even bother with facebook, unl;ess yuour CF is over 30

If you have an Android phone.... get an app called Parallel Space.
And a hidden app launcher.


What I’m really surprised is that many of the girls use their real fucking names in the social media that they give to you. I’m sure the experienced dancers like LinzeeDet use a fake account for their customers. It’s amazing how much you can find out about someone if they give you their real social media account. A quick google search after finding the real identity of a dancer usually includes a mugshot.
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