Lapdance from Hell!!!

I can't tell what is a men's or women's scent, just by smell. Some few men's scents are totally male-only, but so many are floral / Island-spicy / citrus, that it's just all a mish-mash to me. I once asked an older cosmetics lady in a department store what samples she was passing out because they reminded me of strippers. I told her why, as well. "Hey, that smells like a lot of the girls who strip at the club out on Airport Road! What is it?" Nonplussed, she informed me that it had a heavy vanilla content, and therefore probably the girls were just using vanilla extract because it's supposed to be some kind of "natural attraction" scent. If the vanilla is so damn easy, and so readily available at a grocery store, how come women go to department stores to buy fake imitations of it?

Jimmyblong: Sorry, but there is NO way that I could get a dance from a girl that smelled like a guy.

Most girls that I've been with will use a light scent that smells great, but isn't overpowering and thus doesn't linger on your clothes - or maybe leaves a very faint smell. Other girls will just be sporting that clean, freshly bathed smell. My ATF has me addicted to the fragrances of her body wash and especially her shampoo. A whif of her shampoo will have me sportin' wood in seconds...

Of course anything that incriminates you to your S.O. is bad, the worse thing being glitter which is impossible to totally remove. Heavily perfumed dancers can also leave a mark, there was this one dancer I knew who only wore men's cologne so you could use the excuse that you stopped at the mall and tried out a new scent.

A lot of us on this board have commented that we don't like that acrobatic sh... err crap. I don't see anything at all sexy about it. Although, SOMEtimes the flip move that puts the dancers legs up in the air, and their pussy at your face, a la Lacey (BBF, in Indy) DOES have some advantages [wink].

I hate it when I'm getting a dance and the dancer all of a sudden makes that warning ("hold still", "don't move", etc), or starts moving in preparation for a strange maneuver that you can sense is coming... you never know where to hold on, or when to duck...

Just give me the slow sensuous moves with her on my lap straddling me while facing me, plenty of eye contact and some DFK... a little moaning from both of us... and I'm a very happy guy.

Sounds rough.

I once had a wild dancer literally jumping and bouncing up and down on top of my lap doing what was supposed to be a table dance. She was really rough and had something sharp somewhere on her leg. I felt a slight pain in my leg after the dance. When I looked down, I saw blood running down my leg where she had apparently scratched me. I was wearing shorts (summer time at the beach) but never expected to get cut during a table dance.

Last night I was waiting to get a lap dance and both of us were watching this pretty dancer near by tell the guy she was dancing for. She said to guy "DON'T FREAK OUT! STAY STILL. I'm not going to hit your nuts." The dancer next to me said to me "yeah just one nut." The dancer suddenly did a back flip landing her head near his nuts (actually on the sofa) Guess the guy lucked out.

I once got a nasty bloody nose from a dancer I was trying to tip during a stage tip. I swear I've had dancers do all kinds of acrobatic moves including putting their high heals on my shoulders during some one dollar tips. I think some like it dangerous (for me that is). If I see a dancer who seems to rough, I'll avoid the dancer unless I'm not thinking straight.

Some girls seem to think the more extreme the friction the better. It's most common among young, new strippers. Some of them never catch on. One of my faves was like that when she started out. Cute, but her lap dances sucked. After a few months, she began to calm down, and now she gives great, slow, sensual dances.

If she was as bad as Jpac describes, and didn't follow my request, I would just tell her to stop dancing.

Some of you may recall that I previously mentioned a situation from that top-ranked Lap Dance factory in Hammond, IN: Industrial Strip.

A dancer who I had remembered from another club had switched over to (IS), Fairly athletic and sensuous, I sought her out for my fully-nude full-contact, 3 dances for $55. We never completed the series. I began to smell her "womanly fragrance" early during the second dance. She had opted to forego the little hand towel they provide the dancer to keep the "snail trails" from coming into direct contact with the patron's slacks, bare legs, etc.

The smell engulfed my senses and I aborted the mission. She had to have one of the more putrid pudenda I had ever experienced. This smell was now in/on my dress slacks. It became more pronounced in my car. I stopped at the local service station and bought one of those evergreen air fresheners, rubbed gasoline on my hands and thought about buying a cigar in order to mask the smell.

Yea, glitter and perfume may start an argument with the SO. But, putrid pussy smells will start a war and dissolve a relationship. Let's be careful out there.

I agree with Doug. A stripper wearing a men's cologne would remind me of too many lesbians who may be fine people but are not at all hot.