Swipper no Swiping

I hear ya, I go commando cause I'd hate to lose my favorite pair of chones

The last time my wallet was missing, the girl searched the folds of the couch and handed it to me. Then I lost my membership ID and driver's license a week later... Drove back to the club, the dancer had found them after I left and turned them in. This is a dive club. Maybe the girls give a shit, a little, for locals willing to go there.

I have since stitched velcro snaps onto the pockets of those lapping pants.

Why are you bringing your wallet into the club? For those clubs that require ID, I'll bring my driver's license in, but I only pay cash so I don't need a credit card of any type.

You guys make this so hard. It's not.

CP

Never been clipped by a dancer, but a hooker lifted my wallet once.

My ex wife took me for WAY more than any hooker or stripper...

Come to think of it, strip clubs are a bargain compared to marriage and divorce.

I caught a girl trying to sneak a roll of bills from my shirt pocket about midway through a lapper, and called her on it loudly enough to turn every head in the club. She told the bouncer I was accusing her of theft because she refused to suck my dick. I decided to leave, and the bitch had the gall to tell the bouncer to shake me down for the half-completed dance.

There was one dancer where my phone ended up underneath a chair two visits in a row. I called it with my work phone that I was also carrying when I noticed it missing (within a couple of minutes when she was still sitting by me) to find it. The first time, she walked back with me to where we had just done a dance to "help me look for it" and it ended up under the couch, and the second time it somehow ended up under her chair when she was sitting in the chair next to me.

I love the name of this post! It makes me laugh :)