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Up North disappointments

Found myself in a city I haven't ever been to before -- St. Paul MN -- and the major air delays at all my destination cities left me stranded at the airport there. So, naturally, I got out my stupid-phone and read about all the strip-clubs in that area. After I finally figured out that there are NO clubs in the region of the major international airport, I got the good sense to spread my search around a bit (it's not easy with a stupid-phone that doesn't read Google-maps, but I finally figured out how to expand the searches). But then I read the reviews. I had a rental car but umm no thanks. Wow, sorry lot of clubs.

This surprised me a bit. Consistently, ALL the reviews of Mineapolis / Saint P. clubs and area are, that they are low-contact, low-low-low on extras (and you know the way inexperienced reviewers often use the word "extra" to simply mean, "high contact / Tampa-style lap dance" rather than what I personally would mean, "sexual services above and beyond a Tampa-style lap dance"), the girls are below average, etc.

This surprised me, given what I hear about Detroit. To me, Detroit, Mineapolis, Toledo, Cleveland, Madison, and Chicago, are all part of the "upper mid west" range of "big city" destinations. Detroit is famous for having excellent-looking girls and a very very liberal attitude toward contact during "real" lappers" as well as "extra" services. Chicago is big enough that SOMEWHERE in their metropolitan area there are liberal jurisdictions as well as conservative ones, on the subjects of enforicng lapping and extras regulations. So I had assumed, Mineapolis being the biggest thing from Chicago on westwards until you cross the Rockies, Mineapolis would have SOMETHING similar to Detroit or, failing that, AT LEAST as fun as Chicago.

I drove a borrowed car to go look at the strip clubs in Saint P. / Mineapolis and what I saw was disappointing. They're all in old warehouse areas of town, but the warehouse areas have gentrified. Each Deja Vu chain club is surrounded by yuppies at chix-chix joints with cappucinos and new hybrid cars. Once I figured out this demographic shift, the lame-ness of the clubs made sense to me. Of course these areas are now much more carefully policed and enforced, because more money is moving in, the old warehouses are getting converted to "artist loft" space, and so forth.

So, why haven't the strip clubs in the Mpls / St P area moved on out toward, say, for example, the airport? And in the process, recaptured some of their urban ... ahem ... CHARM? Like, you know, some CHARMING activities by some CHARMING ladies? kind of thing? Why are they just remaining in areas poor for high-service, thus not drawing either (a) women motivated (probably by need for money) to work (hence, motivated to make themselves more attractive to ME) (b) customers willing to pay.

What happened in Minesotta?