I might be in the minority, but when I go to the club, I just like hanging with one girl for the whole time I'm there. It complicates things when I have a few favs there at the same time. Of course they're gonna all want dances, and it makes them jealous when they see me spend money and buy dances from other girls. They know most of the time I like to spend money, so they generally don't leave my side. When a fav who is sitting me has to go on stage, another of my favs swoops in five seconds later and sits with me. When the other girl gets off the stage she gives the girl sitting with me a dirty look. What a mess.
You guys ever face this dilemma?
Do you like multiple favs there at the same time or do you like just chilling with one of your favs there for the whole time you're there?
Obviously enough, I'm a "hang out with exactly one fave for my entire trip" guy, as documented in excruciating detail over the last couple of years :) My solution to multiple faves is the same as my solution to most "problems" when it comes to stripper politics, which is: rock-solid confidence and transparency.
By which I mean, this scene has played out for me countless times:
Wednesday: Text CF #1, set up appointment with her for my trip Friday.
Friday: CF #2 approaches, I greet her warmly, tell her "I have an appointment with CF #1 today, but hope to see you next time!" CF #2: "Okay, have fun! You have to see me next time!"
That's it. I think problems occur when the guys act like little bitches, sneaking around because they're scared, and the girls get confused about what's going on, worried that they've lost a regular, furious that they think another girl stole you away. If you're transparent and matter-of-fact, all the jealousy and bad feelings melt away. Obviously, there's always exceptions: some strippers are batshit crazy and there's no way to win no matter what you do, which is a good trigger to give them their walking papers. But I've had a fairly drama free SC life for quite a while using this approach, even though some of my CFs have been known as "jealous" girls
I like just chilling with one girl and just having one fav there at a time so that I can just focus on her and there's no drama lol. If I have multiple favs at the club I'm gonna want to get dances from all of them. The problem is when one of my favs sits with me she sticks to me like glue, and therefore none of my other favs can come over. I'm too nice to tell her I want some company from the other girls too.
Girls know how to share. They just don't want to, and if manipulating you w jealousy works, they will do it. Be honest ab your plans from the start, and when you are done w a girl for the day, tell her you are doing to see if you can catch "other girl" before you go, if you want to see her too. You can also tell a girl, "I'm going to hang out and see who all is here for a little bit. Come get a chance from me after you get off stage (or whenever)."
Don't let girls sit w you while the girl you are talking to is onstage. They might stop by to say hi, but tell them you'll catch up w them later and then get up and tip the girl who has been sitting w you. Girls know better ab stuff like this, but play dumb to customers. If you are sitting w an extablished alpha girl, you will notice that girls behave differently than if she is a young new girl.
Some girls really don't know how to share bc they are insecure brats. I tend to avoid the customers of girls like this unless they really make it worth the trouble. It's your money, so spend it on the girls who give you the experience you want.
yeah, i can't say i've had the same experiences. just like houjack said, i've found that strippers don't get jealous. i've even had them ask me what type of girls i like so that they can send those type over to me
At mu secondary club, which is 100% non-extras I could literally claim 6 dancers as cf's and there are another 5 or 6 I'd like to add to that list. If you are polite and honest, they will understand, but the minute they lay claim to be or get bitchy they are done. There is only one woman on earth who has a right to me and that is my wife.
@bj99 for the short time you've been on here I have to say you've incredibly insightful. Hopefully you stick around.
@vikings- I think the difference that these other girls are also my favs, I've spent lots of money on them and gotten plenty of dances from them in the past. I'm pretty sure they're not gonna ask me what kind of girls and then bring them over to me lol.
-->"yeah, i can't say i've had the same experiences. just like houjack said, i've found that strippers don't get jealous"
As a general rule I don't think the girls get jealous, but as bj99 said, they'll "manipulate you with jealousy", particularly if they think you're susceptible, or sometimes if they're just irritated
Regardless of the fact that it's not romantic jealousy, when customers try to sneak around or play the girls against each other, I have seen it result in resentments and screaming matches. One girl thinking another "stole" her Carbon-based Wallet Support System can result in real feelings and actions... they're just not romantically-motivated
Oh, they do get jealous, just like they feel rejection, but they also know they aren't supposed to. They know how to not display their jealousy, when it's to their benefit.
The vast majority of dancers understand the situation and, if you are honest and polite in explaining, there is no problem. I mean, the dancers all have dozens of "regulars" so how can they begrudge us that we have a few "favorites" ?
On very rare occasion, a dancer cops an attitude. If so, I cross her off my list. On one occasion, it got bad enough that I had to stop going to that club for a few months just to avoid another confrontation with her. I had stumbled onto a psycho stripper. It's just part of the hobby.
I find it nice to have a CF and a few stanbys. I need someone ready to step up when CF either gets complacent or quits the biz or moves or just doesn't show up.
As mentioned above, you just have to be honest and let them know where they fall in the pecking order. They never start at the CF level so as long as their expectations are managed there USUALLY isn't a problem.
I am also clear with CF that whIle spending time with her is important to me I also have others that I enjoy
the company of and that I also like me a little strange.
My typical visit to my regular club is about:
1/2 with CF followed by
1/2 with other members of the flock, just lounging/scoping, and giving tryouts to prospects.
Seems like more of a "you" problem than a "they" problem.
I am the absolute opposite of a "monogamous" clubber, and probably have 10-15 regulars at my main club at any given time. With one exception about 15 years ago, never had a jealous dancer or a cross word spoken to me about "why am I dancing with so-and-so" and not her. The only problem I have is when I have too many "closers" on a shift and one stops my table early in the visit, takes me to VIP and KMSO, then I have to decide if I want to stay and do a double pop, or roll out and miss a few dancers I would have liked to have lapped.
When I am faced with the too many dancers dilemma, I'll make a snap decision on which one(s) I take to VIP, and which one(s) I'll simply do multiple laps tableside. It's your money. Have the onions to tell a dancer your also here to see "x" dancer. She'll understand, and if she doesn't, time to move on.
When you are friendly with multiple girls in the same venue, sometimes they will play a game to force you to show your hand. They will both approach you together, all smiley. It is very hard to treat them the same. You end up showing preferred interest in one of them.
Many expert womanizers are business travelers, hotels paid for by untaxed funds, and able to control it by keeping the women separate, and always having the circuit breaker available of leaving town a bit early to diffuse problems.
But overall Larry, you are not a school boy. You have not surrendered your 14th Amendment citizenship in marriage. So you don't need to spend so much time and money strip clubs. Just pick a girl and start wearing out your mattress with her night after night.
My approach is similar to Subras. I don't regularly make appointments to see strippers ITC, although I will occasionally. But, if a girl I'm sitting with needs to get up for a bit, I'll ask her if she'd like me to wait for her. If she says yes, I'll wait for her. Telling other girls to move along similar to Subra's technique. "Thanks for coming over, I'm hanging out with Tiffani today thought"
There's some girls I won't even bother asking because I know the answer, and most girls who I've been around enough to consider favorites know my MO, so they won't come by and try to stake a claim. They'll come over and say hello, maybe something like "we have to hang out next time" or "I can't wait to spend time with you when you're free" or whatever. Occasionally they'll ask if I'm free or whatever.
Its never been an issue, I suspect because like Subra said, I'm up front about it and take control of the situation rather than relying on them to.
KMSO = Knock My Shit Out. Z-bone euphemism for a happy ending. As opposed to KMSI, which is Keep My Shit In, which is when you're trying to swim against the tide of a very hands-on and goal oriented dancer.
When I was a kid I heard that if a dog is coming towards you and you turn and run that this kicks in the dog's natural chase instinct to keep chasing you and perhaps attack - probably analogous to strippers that are often manipulative; i.e. if you don't stand your ground but just give lame excuses then their natural instinct to go in for the kill will go into overdrive.
There can only be one boss, you or her/the-strippers - you are the one w/ the dough so you should be the boss and set the rules of engagement.
I think skibim might have meant to most on that thread from the dancer who thinks she's just too pretty, smart, and confident, to make any money. Nina made a great comment.
As we all/should know; women can be very competitive w/ each other - I do believe there is a certain amount of "jealousy" just not in the romantic sense but more like when the other ho gets the best of a dancer (gets a custy the dancer was after, etc) - and there is also the "market place" forces; i.e. in certain clubs there may be enough food ($$$) to go around for all the dancers to eat but this is not the case in many clubs where custies willing-and-able to spend may be the minority w/ many just being mostly spectators - thus the competition for "resources" ($$$) is often def at play, IMO - i.e. often times dances will try to maneuver to make sure they don't go w/o
Good discussion because I may be faced with this situation next week.
I currently have 2 CF's and its a possibility that they both may be at the SC next week when I go.
I told CF #2 that Ill contact her early next week to see what days shes working but if CF#1 shows up too then I may be fucked, especially if its a slow night Lol
Then again they both probably don't t give a damn.
Just be sure to get one dance from whoever you don't spend the majority of time w this time. What works well is if you spend most of your time and money on one girl, but be sure to always tip the other girl on stage, and let her know you'd like a dance before you go. Tell the first girl you will be getting a dance from the other girl later. If you sense attitude, you can even ask her to get the other girl for you after you two do your dances.
^^^ "I think skibim might have meant to most on that thread from the dancer who thinks she's just too pretty, smart, and confident, to make any money. Nina made a great comment."
I always thought Nina was the dancer who thinks she's just too pretty, smart, and confident. But supposedly she makes more $$$ than anyone.
-->" I do believe there is a certain amount of "jealousy" just not in the romantic sense but more like when the other ho gets the best of a dancer (gets a custy the dancer was after, etc)"
Without question, while it might not be romantic jealousy, there are various real feelings involved, which on myriad occasions I've seen lead to a stripper kerfuffle and even fisticuffs. These feelings span everything from just general anger that her Wallet Support Unit has gone, to humiliation that the other girl "won", to fury that the other girl "stole" her Wallet Support Unit.
Stories! Stories are always fun. My CF would stay with me for many hours at a time... well past my usual 3-4 hour trips, sometimes. A few times per shift she'd go hunting for other customers, and I'd do lapdances with some of the other girls. One day I did a dance with CF's stripper arch-nemesis, April. CF comes back to me and says, "I don't care if you get dances with other girls, or if you get dances with April when I'm not here. But would you mind not getting dancers with her when I'm here? After she gets a dance from you, she always comes in the back and smiles at me. She got my regular to get a dance with her, so that means she won."
Another story: really hot stripper at the club, but even during her hustle you can tell she's horrible. Completely mechanical, uninterested feel, she'd totally drop the act and make it clear she hates you when you turn her down, etc. Total Beyoch. One day my new CF tells me that that particular girl, Ms Beyoch, *hates* her because one of Ms Beyoch's good regulars got one look at CF and switched over. Funny thing happens: once Ms Beyoch notices I"m CF's regular, she's a completely different person: all smiles, warm, flirty. Every time CF wanders away, Beyoch is turning on the sexy afterburners. It's crystal clear what's happening: CF "Stole" Beyoch's regular, so right now CF is "winning"; Beyoch can even the score with me. All of this has nothing to do with me, of course, I'm the hapless idiot the girls are using to do mean girl things to each other
rickdugan faced this problem one time. And, although he is an Internet Tough Guy on TUSCL. All like "I know how to be the man. I am the one in charge. I'm in the driver's seat not the strippers". But when he ran into this problem that some nights two of his favorites would be working it was not something his "real man" self could figure out how to handle. So he just stayed home those nights for many months. Seriously! What a homo!
And Dougster avoids all such problems by staying in his appartment and watching the Bloomberg financial program. To him women are at best just cum receptacles.
In LA we are fortunate enough to have a ton of clubs, so that if things start getting too intense from girls bickering over "their" customers and "their" money, there are plenty of other clubs to go to until the drama dies down.
^^^^^ And I think that is the way one must approach it.
Lopaw +5
The stuff I was talking about was when I was married and could not move on girls and make it happen, like in my own bed. So I was a PL flirting with them in their workplaces, strip clubs and Viet Coffee.
Now, it is different.
Larry should not be spending lots of time courting girls in strip clubs, nor should he be talking to them like they do sex for money. Civilian and respectful approach, and he may very well find himself waking up the next morning with the girl.
But if a custie gets under a dancer's skin, watch out. She may not only be jealous, and she can be furious if he does not deliver as he has led her on.
I learned this in my very first strip club visits, decades ago.
I treat women like civilians, and in all situations. But this can mean that girls really go for me.
When I was married, I could not deliver. So I had to cool it. I could not express myself freely with girls, strip club dancers or otherwise.
So, if you want to get along with a strip club girl, you have to relate to her as any other girl. But if you do this, then it will be easy to hurt her feelings.
So best is just to asap get her out of the club and into your own bed. Then fter that stay away from her club.
49 comments
Obviously enough, I'm a "hang out with exactly one fave for my entire trip" guy, as documented in excruciating detail over the last couple of years :) My solution to multiple faves is the same as my solution to most "problems" when it comes to stripper politics, which is: rock-solid confidence and transparency.
By which I mean, this scene has played out for me countless times:
Wednesday: Text CF #1, set up appointment with her for my trip Friday.
Friday: CF #2 approaches, I greet her warmly, tell her "I have an appointment with CF #1 today, but hope to see you next time!" CF #2: "Okay, have fun! You have to see me next time!"
That's it. I think problems occur when the guys act like little bitches, sneaking around because they're scared, and the girls get confused about what's going on, worried that they've lost a regular, furious that they think another girl stole you away. If you're transparent and matter-of-fact, all the jealousy and bad feelings melt away. Obviously, there's always exceptions: some strippers are batshit crazy and there's no way to win no matter what you do, which is a good trigger to give them their walking papers. But I've had a fairly drama free SC life for quite a while using this approach, even though some of my CFs have been known as "jealous" girls
If I wanna see X today and Y comes up I say "I came to see X today." Haven't had a problem yet.
Don't let girls sit w you while the girl you are talking to is onstage. They might stop by to say hi, but tell them you'll catch up w them later and then get up and tip the girl who has been sitting w you. Girls know better ab stuff like this, but play dumb to customers. If you are sitting w an extablished alpha girl, you will notice that girls behave differently than if she is a young new girl.
Some girls really don't know how to share bc they are insecure brats. I tend to avoid the customers of girls like this unless they really make it worth the trouble. It's your money, so spend it on the girls who give you the experience you want.
@vikings- I think the difference that these other girls are also my favs, I've spent lots of money on them and gotten plenty of dances from them in the past. I'm pretty sure they're not gonna ask me what kind of girls and then bring them over to me lol.
As a general rule I don't think the girls get jealous, but as bj99 said, they'll "manipulate you with jealousy", particularly if they think you're susceptible, or sometimes if they're just irritated
Jealous? No
Resentful? Sometimes
On very rare occasion, a dancer cops an attitude. If so, I cross her off my list. On one occasion, it got bad enough that I had to stop going to that club for a few months just to avoid another confrontation with her. I had stumbled onto a psycho stripper. It's just part of the hobby.
I find it nice to have a CF and a few stanbys. I need someone ready to step up when CF either gets complacent or quits the biz or moves or just doesn't show up.
As mentioned above, you just have to be honest and let them know where they fall in the pecking order. They never start at the CF level so as long as their expectations are managed there USUALLY isn't a problem.
I am also clear with CF that whIle spending time with her is important to me I also have others that I enjoy
the company of and that I also like me a little strange.
My typical visit to my regular club is about:
1/2 with CF followed by
1/2 with other members of the flock, just lounging/scoping, and giving tryouts to prospects.
I am the absolute opposite of a "monogamous" clubber, and probably have 10-15 regulars at my main club at any given time. With one exception about 15 years ago, never had a jealous dancer or a cross word spoken to me about "why am I dancing with so-and-so" and not her. The only problem I have is when I have too many "closers" on a shift and one stops my table early in the visit, takes me to VIP and KMSO, then I have to decide if I want to stay and do a double pop, or roll out and miss a few dancers I would have liked to have lapped.
When I am faced with the too many dancers dilemma, I'll make a snap decision on which one(s) I take to VIP, and which one(s) I'll simply do multiple laps tableside. It's your money. Have the onions to tell a dancer your also here to see "x" dancer. She'll understand, and if she doesn't, time to move on.
CP
Many expert womanizers are business travelers, hotels paid for by untaxed funds, and able to control it by keeping the women separate, and always having the circuit breaker available of leaving town a bit early to diffuse problems.
SJG
SJG
There's some girls I won't even bother asking because I know the answer, and most girls who I've been around enough to consider favorites know my MO, so they won't come by and try to stake a claim. They'll come over and say hello, maybe something like "we have to hang out next time" or "I can't wait to spend time with you when you're free" or whatever. Occasionally they'll ask if I'm free or whatever.
Its never been an issue, I suspect because like Subra said, I'm up front about it and take control of the situation rather than relying on them to.
:)
KMSO = Knock My Shit Out. Z-bone euphemism for a happy ending. As opposed to KMSI, which is Keep My Shit In, which is when you're trying to swim against the tide of a very hands-on and goal oriented dancer.
CP
There can only be one boss, you or her/the-strippers - you are the one w/ the dough so you should be the boss and set the rules of engagement.
I currently have 2 CF's and its a possibility that they both may be at the SC next week when I go.
I told CF #2 that Ill contact her early next week to see what days shes working but if CF#1 shows up too then I may be fucked, especially if its a slow night Lol
Then again they both probably don't t give a damn.
I always thought Nina was the dancer who thinks she's just too pretty, smart, and confident. But supposedly she makes more $$$ than anyone.
Without question, while it might not be romantic jealousy, there are various real feelings involved, which on myriad occasions I've seen lead to a stripper kerfuffle and even fisticuffs. These feelings span everything from just general anger that her Wallet Support Unit has gone, to humiliation that the other girl "won", to fury that the other girl "stole" her Wallet Support Unit.
Stories! Stories are always fun. My CF would stay with me for many hours at a time... well past my usual 3-4 hour trips, sometimes. A few times per shift she'd go hunting for other customers, and I'd do lapdances with some of the other girls. One day I did a dance with CF's stripper arch-nemesis, April. CF comes back to me and says, "I don't care if you get dances with other girls, or if you get dances with April when I'm not here. But would you mind not getting dancers with her when I'm here? After she gets a dance from you, she always comes in the back and smiles at me. She got my regular to get a dance with her, so that means she won."
Another story: really hot stripper at the club, but even during her hustle you can tell she's horrible. Completely mechanical, uninterested feel, she'd totally drop the act and make it clear she hates you when you turn her down, etc. Total Beyoch. One day my new CF tells me that that particular girl, Ms Beyoch, *hates* her because one of Ms Beyoch's good regulars got one look at CF and switched over. Funny thing happens: once Ms Beyoch notices I"m CF's regular, she's a completely different person: all smiles, warm, flirty. Every time CF wanders away, Beyoch is turning on the sexy afterburners. It's crystal clear what's happening: CF "Stole" Beyoch's regular, so right now CF is "winning"; Beyoch can even the score with me. All of this has nothing to do with me, of course, I'm the hapless idiot the girls are using to do mean girl things to each other
IDK, by a little bit of competition might be a good thing if it gets you higher mileage.
And Dougster avoids all such problems by staying in his appartment and watching the Bloomberg financial program. To him women are at best just cum receptacles.
SJG
Lol!
Hard to deal with it, they are making you put up or shut up.
SJG
Lopaw +5
The stuff I was talking about was when I was married and could not move on girls and make it happen, like in my own bed. So I was a PL flirting with them in their workplaces, strip clubs and Viet Coffee.
Now, it is different.
Larry should not be spending lots of time courting girls in strip clubs, nor should he be talking to them like they do sex for money. Civilian and respectful approach, and he may very well find himself waking up the next morning with the girl.
SJG
I learned this in my very first strip club visits, decades ago.
I treat women like civilians, and in all situations. But this can mean that girls really go for me.
When I was married, I could not deliver. So I had to cool it. I could not express myself freely with girls, strip club dancers or otherwise.
So, if you want to get along with a strip club girl, you have to relate to her as any other girl. But if you do this, then it will be easy to hurt her feelings.
So best is just to asap get her out of the club and into your own bed. Then fter that stay away from her club.
SJG
Pursuits on camera! Great for TV!!
SJG