Disconnect

Is that what they mean by cognitive dissonance?

^^^shit man, I don't even know what that means lol.

Larry on ignore for not getting Jim's reference.

I do. Sometimes I have to sneak off to urbandictionary.com to translate some of what they say, sure.

For the younger ones (I'm old enough to be their father now) I find it works best if I treat them like a giggle, jiggly, bubbly distraction and just enjoy the show / just enjoy the ride.

I think this is why some of the old dancers -- whether older is 27 or 32 or 37 or 42 -- still make bank at some clubs. For some customers, these dancers are preferred to talk to as a young, but still relatable, woman.

Even with the young ones, I still manage to find something interesting for the two of us to talk about. I think even with these platonic conversations, the convo should steer somewhat into seduction territory. That helps to sell dances, GFE play in the front room, or OTC p4p, I suppose. Civilianize, but seduce!

I typically like older dancers (late 20's or early to mid 30's) for just the reasons you speak of. However, today I met a 19 year old whose car payment was due. We had no disconnect.

I think it depends on the woman. Just like us some have brains and some don't. Some thing you can relate to and some you can't.

To sum it up. YES I do feel disconnected from these young strippers sometimes. But then one comes along that has a decent conversation and I go get a dance from her.

Hell, when the difference in age is sometimes 40 years or more, I am thrilled that they will sit on my lap and speak words that sound somewhat familiar ! ! ! ! (more thrilled when they speak universal language words like, "mmmph" and then swallow.)

I don't usually have too long conversations with the young ones. I just want them to grind on me anyway.

I don't go to strip-clubs for convos w/ dancers; although I accept that many like that aspect of it.

For me, I either:

1. regret trying to get into meaningful convos w/ them b/c the more comfortable they get the more their crazy and dysfunctional side that comes out

2. I can only think w/ one head at a time - if my big-head gets engaged in "meaningful conversation" my little-head has no interest and goes to sleep - and I go to SCs to have my little-head stimulated not my big-head

I banter and tease back and forth with them. But some of them are so dense, they can't even handle that in which case its easy to handle. Next.

I was wearing a t-shirt with an illustration of a beaver with shaving creme on it's face and the caption read "I love shaved beaver". So the 19 yo strippers asks me if beaver is the same as pussy. I tell her yes, we go to VIP and she gives me a great BBBJ. No disconnect problem.

Um, yeah... If a customer didn't probably not the kind of guy who is going to be a PL anyway

they have been brainwashed by the "music and lyrics" of the club. it's difficult to have a conversation with a girl that is intermittently rapping lyrics of the "song" playing.

it used to be that the girls would try and seem interested in you, laugh at your bad jokes, remember what kind of work you did, and present the fantasy girl to you. now, you're lucky if they don't present their entire financial dilemma to you (complete with lack of child support from deadbeat boyfriend/sperm donor), rent, probation, methadone, outfits, tattoos, hair, nails, drugs. the disconnect is not because they're younger than us. it's because their background (especially being in a strip club) is radically different, and their priorities and work ethic are not the same.

There are exceptions even for me, but as a general rule, I relate to them fine, which is good, since my typical trip lasts 3-4 hours straight, all with the same girl. That said, I tend to control the conversation and guide the topics to things i find interesting, I can't abide a 19-year-old babbling in whatever direction her attention span takes her. I may just have a higher tolerance for 20-something conversation than most of you, but I definitely also am an active participant in the conversation rather than letting her control it, and that makes a huge huge difference in whether we're talking about something I'm interested in or not.

Papi " I regret trying to get into meaningful convos w/ them b/c the more comfortable they get the more their crazy and dysfunctional side that comes out" That is good points to you

I wrote: -->"There are exceptions even for me, but as a general rule, I relate to them fine"

I take that completely back. I didn't mean I relate to them -- I generally don't. What I mean is, I have very fun and engaging conversations with them.

Well, I can't say that I typically have much problem with disconnect. After all, I had many of the same problems at their age, even if I've moved beyond those to other problems. Admittedly, that age is long past, and I'm old enough to be grandfather to some of them, but how difficult is it to connect to problems with boys (or girls), money, douchebag baby daddies, and such? Yeah, it's a different world, but it's an understandable world.

It really depends on the dancer. I've met some nerdy 20 year old dancers who were into the same shows and games as me. And I've met late 20s dancers I had nothing to talk about with.

Also bear in mind a lot of 18-20 year Olds haveny honed their sales skills. They get dances for showing up and being cute.

One of the clubs I go to often is a "starter" club. You get a lot of young dancers, but last Monday I did sample two of the older ones on the shift: 21 and 21. They usually have a few 18 year olds in the regular rotation. If they are smart I talk to them like any other smart person. If they aren't I make t hem laugh. Conversation is important because the greater the connection, the greater the time. It can literally be the difference between a decent lap dance and a gfe in public.

I can talk to anybody about most anything, which comes in handy in a SC. There have been a few times where a dancer was incapable of holding up her end of a conversation, so I usually just took her for a dance and usually the dance, like her conversational skills, sucked. I never thought about poor communication skills out on the floor corresponding to a crappy lap dances but its happen too often to be a coincidence.

Hmmm, interesting insight.

I've been meeting my ATF OTC for many years and I'm 40 years her senior (exactly - she was born on my 40th birthday). I know just about every detail of her life and know most of her family members. We relate well, but only on a limited number of topics. I'm fascinated with this year's presidential race & she barely knows who's running. She is so self absorbed that she has difficulty understanding the big picture on most things, even those that directly affect her. She has lost her license for the foreseeable future so I drive her frequently and I can't stand the fucking rap music she gets on the car radio, so we negotiated playlists on my phone which we play - Coldplay, Eminem, Jewel, Three Days Grace, etc. she is in the process of moving to Floriduh and will still find drama in her life, I'm sure. She's going to be in Fort Pierce initially and wants to continue dancing, but I don't see any clubs listed on here for Fort Pierce. Any clubs nearby?

That's probably what's happening to me sometimes with these strippers. I usually chalk it up to neither of us wants to talk. I had one stripper recently I figure 20 - 25 (I'm 31) just come sit on my lap said hi and nothing else. My fav at one of my clubs is in her 50s and we just talk about life in general and she can still keep the conversation fun. I would have to say though I'm probably at a disconnect with the 18 to roughly 24 age.

I love to find a dancer who can carry on an adult conversation. I've had lots of fun with those girls. However, with the last stripper I met we hardly said a word, yet connected just fine. She was plenty tight and had a great smile too. And that was all that mattered.

The only connection needed is her mouth with your dick. Lol

But seriously, the ability to hold a conversation with the girl is directly proportional to how good her dances are ... as a general rule. There are always exceptions.

The French Connection was a pretty good movie

A french connection with a dancer is even better

Yes, they are disconnected from our realities, but weren't we all at that age. What gets my ass is some of the bizarre hair colors and arrangements. I try not to visibly react at some of the weirdness.

wait a minute? Your 26? I thought you were an old man. HAH, you're slightly older than me. Good to know you're dong so well for someone so young.

Connecting with people is a skill that can be developed. It's not about having similar lifestyles, tastes, nor upbringing but about curiosity. It's about finding out the emotional, motivational, and characteristics of not what they do but why they do it. I don't do nightclubs nor interested in some of the same celebrities such as Beiber, Gomez, Arianna etc but do have enough working knowledge to discuss them.

Thanks Tiburon! I worked really hard in college, and I had a couple connections out here. I was kind of in the right place at the right time.

Isn't disconnect just another word for pulling out? :)

I find that age isn't what makes the biggest disconnects. I have quite a few young people in my life through family , friends and work. The ladies I have my biggest disconnect with are those that have become institutionalized (to borrow from Shawshank Redemption ).

Sure there's some disconnect but not nearly as much as you'd expect. I have a lot of experience relating to 18-25 yo strippers, and many of them have experience relating to horny men older than their fathers who want to fuck them.