Mexican standoff. (no offense). She says I need to do more. In the real world (I realize the irony here) if an employee is up for a raise, there is an evaluation to determine whether or not an increase is merited. Of course, in the real world, due to tardiness, absences and general complacency, she would have been fired long ago. There is the old saw: No matter how fine she is, there is some poor bastard that is sick of her shit. The sense of entitlement based on looks alone has diminished the total package. Going for the hottest girl in the room is a tough game. I am about played out, but not in the way she thinks. Do I show my hand and keep her, or trade in for better mileage?
The employer-employee relationship is not the correct model for teachers and students, as teachers shouldn't think of their students as employees that they have to please. However, it is more appropriate for the interaction between customer and stripper, except that the customer is the *employer*. It is not up to you to jump through the stripper's hoops. With an attitude like hers, unless she's super-hot and accommodating, you should kick her to the curb.
Today I just did the opposite. I told mine we're lowering OTC. I laid out the facts of how she has it very good with me; steady income, long-term relationship, lots of gifts, dates, and trips. Both of us could look for greener pastures, she's already worried that's going to happen.
Super hot. Expects everything on her terms. She can do good on the one shot deals, hit and run. That's ok. In sales, the 'hard close' backfires sometimes. Lucky for me, her timing was poor. No regrets, but I won't be played that hard again.
Too many times we PLs are the ones paying yet letting the dancer make all the rules and treat us any ole way - that is whack and is upside down and not the way it's supposed to be - and when things are upside down that is how we end up w/ upside down whack results.
IMO, w/ many a dancer the best way to get proper treatment is to stand one's ground - if you allow her to treat you like shit or any ole way then you are more to blame than her - IME the firmer I stand my ground w/ a dancer more often than not the better treatment I often get.
Sometimes standing your ground may mean she walks - but personally I rather lose her than have her not treat me as I deserve per the $$$ I'm paying her.
Oh, yes. I accept full responsibility for allowing myself to take this plunge. The disparity between cost and benefit has been too great for too long and she pressed too hard too often, and this time, too soon. It's like pulling a thorn, it hurts, but the relief that follows! I'm just glad I got the wake up call before, well, she'll never know...
"No matter how fine she is, there is some poor bastard that is sick of her shit."
I have heard a saying similar to this. For every hot bitch, there is some guy tired of fucking her. Funny how a shitty attitude will take points of a woman's appearance.
^^^"In most cases, the moment she sends you off, there's 3 PLs willing to take your place." Yup, and if one goes back to the club again, and she is there, one will find out that she is doing just fine without a hard to get PL.
Bitches got all the pussy, and half the money. Well, they got half of my money anyways.
If you don't stand your ground with these girls they will fuck you, over take as much as they can, and you will not get shit for your effort, OTH if you are a regular and demand that you be treated with respect not falling for false promises or giving them money without getting something of value to you, in return, you should be good to go. As far as the other 3 PLs waiting to take your place trust me she will rarely see those guys again whereas if you are a regular and contribute to her income the smarter girls will treat you fairly and you will enjoy your SC visits more.
That's my advice, and also how I roll.
Trick is to remember (and this is easy to say harder to practice) that you are not in a relationship with a stripper. Not in the traditional sense anyway. In a relationship you are emotionally tangled up with a woman and you can expect some back and forth. You are in a p4p relationship with a stripper. All you can expect is to get the service that you negotiated for the price you negotiated. If she doesn't honour that you walk, if you don't honour that, she walks. If you think you are in a some other kind of relationship other than straightforward p4p, you will get screwed (and not the way you want).
Actually, it got to the point I was as doing more and more for less and less in return and would have done so much more if she could only keep a date. She knew what I was bringing but maybe she got a higher 'bid'. I'm just lucky she did this before her birthday.
"... and would have done so much more if she could only keep a date ..."
That's the thing - one should not expect them to "keep a date" b/c as been stated a million times on TUSCL we are not "dating" these girls nor are they "dating" us (in the traditional sense) - so expecting them to act/behave/respond like a civie we are dating is the old "square peg in round hole'" shit.
Strippers have their own lives OTC most of them don't want us as part of their OTC life - so getting a dancer to honor OTC dates should be seen as the exception rather than the norm and if this is something one can't deal w/ then OTC is not for them.
When dancers are OTC they don't wanna deal w/ club stuff especially needy PLs - if they need/want your $$$ they will respond OTC - if not then they are busy living their lives and no reason for them to wanna interact w/ us - i.e. they will interact w/ us OTC when *they* need/want to - not when we need/want to - just the nature of the beast.
Pali Chulo, believe it or not, I get all that. Time and again she would pick the time and location to meet and cancel after I was already there or flat no show. Then a couple days later she would want money. Pay for no play. I may be an ultimate pl chump, but please!
She seems to not have any desire to do anything/much to earn your business - or may be so fucked up in her personal life that she is unable to - only choice is to find someone that appreciates and wants you as a custy and this may be a kick in her ass to change her tune - or not in which case it's best to cut your losses.
Exactly! #s 2,3,4. are lined up to take her place. I'd get more mileage for half the price and hassle free as well. There's just th one thing... None of them are her. But I'm getting well past that, and I'm not going to make a show of it in front of her, not vindictive like that.
"... None of them are her." That's the problem. All of them are her. This is P4P not a girlfirend. Even a girlfriend you really click with is eventually replaceable. 100% of P4P OTC strippers are replaceable.
I understand what you are trying to say. And to the superficial user, this may hold true. But. It's like this. I have never but once in my entire life been this vulnerable to any woman, no matter how fine, alluring, charming. But, I'll be ok!
Your story happened to me in https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=4… . She tried to renegotiate the tip rates. I had to dump her like a brick off a building and walk away no matter how much I lusted after her and no matter how much I thought "maybe it is real". The moment the ex-ATF mentioned $, it shot my feelings and thoughts for her like an AR-15 to the chest and I had to go "next".
Never beg infront of a stripper. All they do is beg for $ from men as their job. It is as comical as asking a bum for a dollar. Only beg if it is a joke on her and you cancel on her as a last FU.
Listen up, Ima its just business, and it is ok to do business with someone whom you like, the key is to treat it like a transaction and be sure you get your moneys worth. Every successful business transaction is (in theory at least) supposed to end up with a satisfied buyer and a satisfied seller. Rethink your approach is what everyone here is telling you so you don't get burned.
If I am understanding the OP correctly, the girl is starting to relate to you in a civilian manner, telling you what you should be doing.
I don't think enforcing the strict rules of P4P are a good way to respond to this. I think keeping it semi-civilian is good. You just need to learn how to stand up for yourself and handle it, as you would any with any civilian girl. Most important is to never let her get you into a position where you are dependent on her approval. At bottom, she is either going to give you good GFE and spread her legs, or she is not. You can only do so much in trying to influence this. But women test guys, to see if they can push them around.
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Too many times we PLs are the ones paying yet letting the dancer make all the rules and treat us any ole way - that is whack and is upside down and not the way it's supposed to be - and when things are upside down that is how we end up w/ upside down whack results.
IMO, w/ many a dancer the best way to get proper treatment is to stand one's ground - if you allow her to treat you like shit or any ole way then you are more to blame than her - IME the firmer I stand my ground w/ a dancer more often than not the better treatment I often get.
Sometimes standing your ground may mean she walks - but personally I rather lose her than have her not treat me as I deserve per the $$$ I'm paying her.
I have heard a saying similar to this. For every hot bitch, there is some guy tired of fucking her. Funny how a shitty attitude will take points of a woman's appearance.
Unfortunately jackslash is right. In most cases, the moment she sends you off, there's 3 PLs willing to take your place.
Bitches got all the pussy, and half the money. Well, they got half of my money anyways.
That's my advice, and also how I roll.
That's the thing - one should not expect them to "keep a date" b/c as been stated a million times on TUSCL we are not "dating" these girls nor are they "dating" us (in the traditional sense) - so expecting them to act/behave/respond like a civie we are dating is the old "square peg in round hole'" shit.
Strippers have their own lives OTC most of them don't want us as part of their OTC life - so getting a dancer to honor OTC dates should be seen as the exception rather than the norm and if this is something one can't deal w/ then OTC is not for them.
When dancers are OTC they don't wanna deal w/ club stuff especially needy PLs - if they need/want your $$$ they will respond OTC - if not then they are busy living their lives and no reason for them to wanna interact w/ us - i.e. they will interact w/ us OTC when *they* need/want to - not when we need/want to - just the nature of the beast.
1) Don't fall in-love with a stripper
2) Don't forget rule #1
Ignore these two rules and get emotionally involved at one's own peril :)
I don't think enforcing the strict rules of P4P are a good way to respond to this. I think keeping it semi-civilian is good. You just need to learn how to stand up for yourself and handle it, as you would any with any civilian girl. Most important is to never let her get you into a position where you are dependent on her approval. At bottom, she is either going to give you good GFE and spread her legs, or she is not. You can only do so much in trying to influence this. But women test guys, to see if they can push them around.
SJG
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